Has mumsnet changed a great deal?

[dontlikechange]

I just wanted wanted views from people as to wether they think that mumsnet has changed.

I must admit that a while back I was hooked and spent hours daily on the site, I had another child and was unable to post of ages, now I have come back and its feels so cliquey. I started a post within the last week and it got 1 reply, yet the imho the cliquey group threads seem to get a lot more replies and it wasn't as if my thread was not interesting enough.

I started lurking again about a month or so ago and couldn't believe it had changed so much, people flouncing off in huffs etc etc.

I used to feel at home on mumsnet, it just seems to alien, perhaps I am showing my age, times change and my 'face' doesn't fit anymore.

Yes, Mumsnet has changed, and I daresay everyone is entitled to their own view as to whether this is for better of for worse...

I've been on here for 5 years now (the age of my eldest child) and in the last 6 -12 months I've definitely begun to use it less and less, and also actively 'wean' myself off it...
WHY?

Well, I guess it's a combination of all sort of things:

• I probably don't need it in the same way as I did when I had a newborn baby or emerging toddler - second time round you just don't have all the same questions, fears or uncertainties
• with 2 kids and a full time job I have less time, and MN doesn't feel like such a valuable investment of limited time

so, I'm not sure whether Mumsnet, or me, or both has changed (probably!) but there are certainly a few observations I've made over the last few months which make me feel 'it's not so much for me' any more, or that I have 'outgrown' it or something.

I'm sure this will upset someone, because everything evenly remotely debate-inspiring does these days, but I think Mumsnet has become :

• one one hand, more trivial (personally I hate Chat, and think it clutters up the whole place...) and yet, at the same time, in contrast, it has become
• much more serious in terms of the high level of threads dealing with serious life issues (abuse/ divorce/ depression/ debt/ health issues etc)

Although MN is undoubtedly a great support network for a great many people (and has been for me too in the past at the time of my mum's death - thank you!) I sometimes worry that a great many people here use it as their ONLY support network, and actually use it to avoid having to face the real world out there.

I sometimes worry that people don't realise the effect that 'living' the Mumsnet daily 'soap opera drama' might have. Several 'old-timers' have recently posted their intentions to 'ease off' for a while, in order to get on with 'real life' for a while.

I'm afraid I actually mostly find Mumsnet rather depressing these days - too quick to condemn people willing to share their genuine feelings/ too 'transitory' in that threads disappear so fast they're impossible to track, and also just a little bit banal too much of the time - sorry

Whoops - have I just inadvertantly flounced then???

No, I don't think so !

That wasn't a flounce, mo2, just an honest opinion.

Another thing I've found about the increased size of talk, I think I am getting increasingly anonymous. I am sure far fewer people 'know' me now. Most people don't know what I do for a living, how old my children are, where I live, what my opinions and tastes are on all sorts of things, whereas a couple of years ago more regulars would have had some idea at least, just because more people read most of the threads.

This is one reason why I have never permanently changed my name. I don't think there is any need to as few people know that much about me

I never mind if I don't get a reply to a posting - I just think of the armies of lurkers out there all most likely nodding in agreement with me!

I've lurked and posted here for the bet part of 3 years, some this under a different name.

It has grown bigger and in some ways I think this has forced people to congregate on different topics, so that they can chat to the people who they like and have things in common with.

There does appear to be a bit of an air of confrontation about at the moment. I tend not to post on the 'heated' threads but I confess to lurking like mad on them. It really is like watching car crash tv - as soon as certain topics come up then its not a case of 'if there will be a disagreement, but when'!

Still sometimes I think some people are probably nicer in RL as a result as they can vent all their fury and anger on here and then go back to their RL friends much calmer and happier.

I still like mumsnet but don't really tend to post as much as I used to or post as avidly. Mainly as I haven't the time, but also with older children now (4 and 6) a lot of the threads no longer apply to me!