I want everyone to promise that next Christmas they're going to be strong and not invite the IL's, the parents, anyone who doesn't enter into the Christmas spirit and behave well as a house guest

[thehollyandtheivy]

There's so many of you that seem to be destined for a really crap Christmas due to your respective guests. Next year I want you all to say no to these awful relatives/friends and only spend Christmas with those that you love and can guarantee will have a good time with!
I speak from experience, this is the first year in god knows how long I have said no to my miserable sister who every year ruins New Year. It was hard, I was made to feel very guilty, but I can honestly say I'm looking forward to the festive peiod now.

This is the first year we are having my parents for 6 years due to their location and our location. It's going to be hell, they arrive this Wednesday and have an open train ticket for their return.......

I for one couldn't live with the guilt of saying no.

Holly, I totally agree with you I have told DH that his family can come for Xmas dinner( 4.30ish) but cannot stay as I want Xmas and boxing day morning just us and DC, My family are having to wait until 27th to see us.

this might be selfish but it will make for a much more relaxed and happy xmas.

Yes but what do you do when your dh wants to have 50 million people to stay and you don't?

(other than this year's solution of staying in hospital till Christmas is over)

Form an orderly queue behind me, ladies...

Have had my parents once in 24 years

Had MIL twice in 24 years.

We do our own thing at Christmas, see my parents weekend before, dh will fly up to his mum for an afternoon 3 days before.

V. stress free Xmas.

(it is a lot easier if everyone is at least 7 hours drive away, I must admit)

However strong I am the pressure of 4 v elderly gps one with alzheimers + their incontinent ancient dog will be stronger.

This is why we have Christmas Day to ourselves. Have done since DHa nd I moved in together some 10 years or so ago, and we love it, especially with 5yo DD around. It is relaxed, stressfree, and fun. It starts with champagne breeakfast whilst opening presents in PJs, and finishes with a film in front of the TV, in PJs, with wine when DD is in bed. Dinner is stress free, we do what we want when we want.

We actually get on well with both families, but even so we do the family bits on all the other days surrounding it, but Christmas Day is the one day that is all ours!

Does it include going to see relatives you hate, are nasty and snide, feed your children chocolate etc till they go berserk then chuck you out with screaming whirlwind children because said children are making them 'tired'?
I am trying to find an answer to that one.

I stopped doing family I didn't want to about 8 years ago.
I don't have parents or ils over. I don't visit family unless i can get to see my gorgeous sister ( not the other 6 siblings). And I don't invite or go to see anyone that we don't want to.
Just Dh , 3DC's the dog and me - all christmas. Heaven !

(takes small bow and leaves)

(pops back in case anyone is wondering......)
My secret is being in my 40's and finally realising I don't give a shit and I don't feel guilty . It nearly makes up for the wrinkles and the terrible things age has done to my knees.

No-one gets to come to ours on Xmas day. Absolutely NO ONE.
We do the rounds Xmas eve, go to DH's mums on Boxing day for family get together but Xmas day is our own.
The house isn't big enough for many, our table only sits 4 and I am fecked if I am spending all day cooking for people.
We don't like turkey, we like our veg al dente and I can do without people saying "these sprouts aren't cooked", "Oh, but you've GOT to have turkey" etc [bah humbug emoticon]

I wish

See, we can't "do the rounds" because none of our family are local. So when people visit, they come to stay.

Next year we shall have to invite the ILs. It will be the first time we have had them to us for Christmas. Which should be interesting...

I managed to tell my dSIL that her and my not so dear brother aren't welcome to ours this year.
And man, it feels good .
My brother is a nightmare house guest - rude, argumentative, unappreciative. Hurrah for a brother-free festive period.

Geekgirl
doesn't it feel so good
I remember clearly the first year just saying it and it just worked "sorry everyone we are just having christmas on our own this year. We will post your presents. have a good time. catch you sometime in the New Year"
And that was it.

I'm doing just that this year. I decided I'd like to enjoy Christmas this year rather than suffer intolerable relatives who make my life a misery, criticise everything I do, and are such hard work. Life is too short!

We are the same just the 4 of us Christmas day and Boxing day.

In laws came up Boxing day (MIL, SIL and 2 neices) and I would spend 2 hours + cooking a lovely dinner for them whilst they played with the DDs inbetween making them cups of tea etc then to be told so and so doesn't like X Y and Z. DP has put his foot down this year and said there is no way I am doing it again and they can come up on the 27th for some sandwiches. Two years ago they all sat on their bottoms whilst I made dinner when I was 8 1/2 months pregnant!

Same with my family we never get an invite yet they expect to come up here and be waited on hand and foot.

Blimey can't believe how many people seem to hate there families You only have one family you know.

You don't have to spend christmas day with parents/Mil fil etc you could see them beofre or after so you can have a stress free christmas day?

We are spending christmas & boxing day here we can't wait, all relaxed in our pj's, eating nice foods & the kids with there new toys.

We are however off to Mil & Fil next week for a couple of days.

My mum & my sister will pop over on christmas day to see the kids but most of the day will be just us

have put my foot down this year & am only doing a buffet xmas day & going to chill boxing day, last year after finishing work rushed round doing sarnies etc etc,family came hardly ate anything,loads of wasted food,mind you the dog enjoyed all the beef !
and guess what this year have we been invited to anybodys....NO & thats after lots of hints off dh
not really fair is it