Do people take it personally if a child moves to another local school?

[yulebesorry]

Have seen this happen and about to do same but don't want to upset anyone. Would teachers be upset- after spending time with pupil. Move is not related to dissatisfaction with school.Just wondered if you have any similar experiences.

my friend moved her two children to a different school in the area (various reasons) and she got a lot of stick from the deputy head and several parents - who still harp on about it almost 3 yrs on !! It's your business and your decision,so I wouldn't worry about other people's reactions. I suspect that in my friend's case the other parents were unnerved by her moving the children,wondering why she did it (she was a v respected member of the school community)

God yes. i moved my dd out of reception class three years ago to a different school, in the same town but a nicer area.
Head was fine about it, but several of the mums gave me the cold shoulder and still do if i see them around!

the funny thing is though, that after i removed dd from the school in the november, eight others left and went to better schools in the same way, and another seven left the next year!

So i obviously started a trend..

actually,several parents followed my friend and moved their cghildren to the other school - I can't believe that people still hold a grudge about it !

the teachers didnt seem tooooo bothered but the headteacher has ignored me for several months now. and the parents of ds's old classmates no longer talk to me. but we did move him to a private school and i think thats why. but proud to say i dont really care, i did what was best fro my child and had they done everything properly i wouldn thhave moved him. he is a changed boy now. best thing we ever did. will also be moving my other 2 as well when we can afford it.

We live in a smallish town and decided to move DS2 out of his good state infant to the private prep thay DS1 was going to without too many people tkaing it badly.

I think there is a way of ensuring as little 'fallout' as possible though, if you live in a close-knit community, and worry about these things.

In our case I did the following:

• wrote a genuinely gushing letter to the Head of the infants thanking her for all her support of my children and explaining our reasons for moving DS2 (focussing on the family/logistical, rather than things I hadn't been happy about).

• when other friends/ mums at the infants asked or commented, I said something along the lines of "well of course X is a fantastic school (validating their own choice, so i.e. not making it sound as if they were bad parents for leaving their kids there!) but in the case of DS2 I think XYZ at school B will work so much better for him...)

It might sound a bit contrived, but in a small town you never know when you're going to meet up with other families again (sports/ clubs/senior schools) and I just don't like the feeling of having enemies/ folk bad-mouthing me!

We knew why we'd made the decision, and we were happy wioth it, so i guess that's all that mattered.

funnily enough someone in my DS's year (but not class) moved schools in Sept after the first year
spoke to one mother who seemed a little put out
I personally dont feel bothered - if I saw her, I would ask why she did it out of curiosity but my DS is happy where he is so I wont be moving him.
Our school is huge (3 classes per yr) and said child is now in a village school so maybe she didnt like the size.

seems silly to take it personally doesnt it

Yulebesorry - don't think the teachers will be upset, although depends on how you deal with it. For instance, parents of a child in my class moved their child to my own dc's school and told me she was getting much more attention now (ie 'you were a crap teacher')!

I have recently moved one of my dcs and left the other at the original school, and definitely feel like billy no mates when I go to pick up the remaining child now!

You just have to move on really and tell yourself that you made the move for the right reasons.

Actually, forgot to add, the one family we DID fall out with a little bit were the parents of DS1's 'best friend' at infants, as right up to January we, and they, assumed that DS1 would be going to a different prep school (with their son). When we actually got a place at an alternative we hadn't previously considered, we decided it was was a much better school, and opted for it. Since then they have been a bit cool with us, although the kids still see each other. I think it's such a shame, as we really like them as a family, but just wanted different things from the schools I think.

Many thanks to all. I had hoped I had imagined the cold shoulder reactions because I know it really wouldn't worry me if someone moved. However have also noticed that mums can worry about their childs friendships and my children do get many invites to play etc , so am feeling uneasy at having etablished such links if intend to move eleswhere.

Any other opinions?