Today is my first day back at work after a week off and I can honestly say I cannot bring myself to do anything. I have been so demotivated. I previously posted about a staff member having a Halloween party and not inviting me until the last minute after prompting and now it turns out that the firm xmas lunch/drinks is being held at such a place that makes it impossible for me to get to despite my request to have it close to the office (as everyone will be working in the morning anyway) so I can go. This is affecting me more than I feel it should. Logically I should accept that the majority of people wish for it to be 10 miles away but I honestly feel like crying - I feel so left out.
I sometimes cant bear my dh 'cos he whinges constantly.
Consequently I dont feel like I fit in anywhere and am beginning to worry. When I went to sleep last night my heart was fluttering and the same today and I sometimes feel lightheaded.
I dont know what to fix first. I know really I should just jack my job in but then I feel scared that I wont want to work and fall into a pit that I cant get myself out of .