Shit mum

[Alicemtaylor]

I'm so desperately unhappy- my son doesn't speak to me and I'm suicidal- tried to post this several times

That sounds tough. Is it just you and him? How old is he?

Don't know how to use this app properly

Thanks for replying xx

You're not a shit mum. An actual shit mum would not care and you clearly do. Sounds like you need to get support for your own mental health. You can go to your GP, or there are lots of charities out there that offer support for mothers struggling with MH.

How old is your son? They can be so mean to the parent they love the most at various ages. Particularly teens and young adults as they make all sorts of comparisons and value judgements as part of their development. A health care counsellor working with teens told me that they are meanest to and really test the most boundaries on the people they actually trust the most. You don't have to share more info on here, but if you do feel you could have done things differently in the past, you are very much not alone. There are no perfect families out there. What matters today though is not the past but literally the next minute. Focus on making that better for yourself. Even if it's standing outside the back door, looking at a patch of sky and listening to the birds for 30 seconds. Then something nice just for you for five mins/ten mins that you can do when it all gets too much...a walk round the block, people watching etc, anything to change the focus. One of my DC can be mean for days when they are feeling low. Then a sudden few minutes in the park with a sandwich and take out coffee can lift everything and they chat like normal....other times, the same thing is a washout and the shutters come down for days...just have to cherish the small bright moments and endure the rest. Sorry if this sounds trite....you sound so in need of a boost....anyone in real life to talk to? Samaritans (phone free on 116 123 from any phone) are a good option when you are mentally exhausted and feeling so low. No judgement, no answers offered, just a supportive human conversation in complete privacy. I have done this twice in my life and at those points it was both the best and only thing I could have done. It can really lift you when you don't know where to turn or how to carry on.