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It’s Not Me Here is It

13 replies

SingleDad5050 · 16/01/2021 19:29

So I’m honestly trying and different approach to either consider if I’ve been ‘too sensitive’; or as I’m pretty much seeing it had a needless dig lobbed at me.

There is a very emotive situation presently, and as my fiancée hadn’t mentioned whether she’d told her parents I asked (the question being posed in a message chat we were having

Me: Have you told your parents? Xx

Partner: Of course. I tell my parents everything love xx
Partner (right after the above): They are as usual happy to support me to do whatever is best for me xx

Being honest I’ve seen my arse because there’s no reason whatsoever to drop the ‘as usual they are’ lines in accept to imply that I don’t (which is hurtful and really ungrateful given I do more for her than the rest of her family combined and only ever like to get a thank you)

I then get a message about how her mum is worried about her health (which in 90% of cases I’m there to deal with, her finances, which I’m regularly sorting with the last being £1600 in non paid council tax to stop her being summoned all wrapped off with

Partner: She has asked me to add her number to Alexa to allow the boys to ping her if I get sick xx

I admit my response here isn’t productive, but I’m mad at this point

Me: Amazing. It’s almost like this hero response could have been done years ago and is just as achievable in about 4 different ways.

Glad the person who you said you wouldn’t be comfortable to look after your kids has stepped in at the 11th hour to receive your gratitude. I’ll draft some more notes about what I do for the other 23

Not a sterling response I know, but, going back to what kicked that off, is that me?

OP posts:
WhateverJudy · 16/01/2021 19:31

I’m sorry, what? It’s incredibly unclear what you’re asking here.

Sparklingbrook · 16/01/2021 19:33

@WhateverJudy

I’m sorry, what? It’s incredibly unclear what you’re asking here.
Thought it was me. I am going to need some bullet points i think. I don't understand the question.
Blacktothepink · 16/01/2021 19:34

Well, that made perfect sense 🤣🤣

BIWI · 16/01/2021 19:34

I have no fucking clue. What on earth is this about, and what do you want to know?

Sparklingbrook · 16/01/2021 19:36

Anyone remember 321? Feel like we could win a Dusty Bin here.

truetuesdays · 16/01/2021 19:37

What are you annoyed about? That her parents are offering to help and you feel taken for granted or.....?

LastRoloIsMine · 16/01/2021 19:40

The OP is mad that his fiancé's parents are being supportive regarding the question the OP asked her.
The OP is also mad that her mum his worried about her health but not worried enough to do anything helpful which appears to be all left to the OP.

OP you sound like my BIL he is only happy when my SIL is ill (chronic condition) and he is the one caring for her. If anyone tries to help he throws it back in their face as he loves to play the martyr.

Worst · 16/01/2021 19:41

????

lljkk · 16/01/2021 19:41

I think OP is making a meal out of DP saying "as usual" in a tone of "You jackass, stop interfering" when actually OP should be cross that OP is paying loads of money to support a fairly useless DP.

It is confusing, though.

Elieza · 16/01/2021 19:47

I don’t understand the crux of this either sorry OP.

When she said her parents were supporting her as usual I didn’t take it that she was having a dig at you. I took it that her parents always support her fullstop. As all parents should. Nothing to do with you.

However it would depend on the rest of the conversation that we don’t know whether she could have been implying something else.

I don’t know what the problem is re the Alexa. Are you saying that you’re pissed off having to sort everything because they can’t do it themselves?

I honestly think if your communication is as bad at home as it is here that it could be difficult to communicate with you. I’m so sorry, just being honest.

I get the feeling that you feel nobody appreciates the stuff you do for them and you feel used and unappreciated. If that’s the case perhaps you should tell your fiancée that. It could be they appreciate you very much. Just they don’t say it. Or your communication issues mean you don’t realise how grateful they are because you see what you want to see perhaps due to low self esteem or something.

Hard to work out.

CandyLeBonBon · 16/01/2021 20:33

Could you try simplifying your op. It really isn't that easy to work out what the problem is?

YukoandHiro · 16/01/2021 20:41

Have you been drinking? I can't follow this at all.

Moondust001 · 16/01/2021 20:49

Also struggling to grasp what on earth you are talking about, but it sounds to me like you think everyone should be enormously grateful to you for supporting your fiancee, and nobody else should be in the picture. In which case, you perhaps have confused having a relationship with ownership.?

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