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Original poster

Does 'a sense of honour' mean anything to you?

20 replies

TwigorTreat · 17/10/2007 08:19

I often wonder whether that is what is wrong with modern life, no / limited sense of 'personal honour'. But then I look around and realise there are still a number of honourable people in real life.

Honour / self-respect is important to me. What about you?

OP posts:

Pixiefish · 17/10/2007 08:20

yup

screamsprout · 17/10/2007 08:21

Honour often gets caught up with pride, which I don't think is a particularly useful basis for much. Self-respect/esteem, yes, absolutely.

EffiePerine · 17/10/2007 08:23

Behaving morally and having self-esteem are different things, though. You can have a strong sense of self-esteem and still behave like a git (wasn't there a Rowntree Foudnation study on bullying that blamed high self-esteem?)

WaynettaVonBlood · 17/10/2007 08:24

Absolutely. IMHO you need Personal honour and self respect in order to be able to respect others, and there is a severe lack of both.

(shuffles off mumbling into her shawl)

bossybritches · 17/10/2007 08:24

Quite agree TT but in todays world it's the dis-honourable who seem to get on. It's a ME ME ME world & I find it an increasing struggle to teach the kids otherwise, with the role models they see around them!(in the wider world I mean not their own world!)

allhallows · 17/10/2007 08:25

Interesting point about confusing honour and pride. Thinking about that.

Original poster

TwigorTreat · 17/10/2007 08:27

no IMHO honour is about behaving the right way with regards to other people .. its a Mrs Doasyouwouldbedoneby sort of thing

self-respect is about respecting yourself to do the right thing and to be an honourable person

self-esteem is about thinking yourself as being good and worthy and THIS can get mixed up with pride and self-glorification and selfishness

IMHO

OP posts:

moopymoo · 17/10/2007 08:30

self respect and personal responsibility and accountability are really important to me and are values i want my kids to have...however i thing 'honour' can be a bit paralysing in certain situations. my brother is a big one for this and it equates for him to 'never owing anyone anything' - time, money ,favours, and is such a strong creed in his house that his kids are frightened to ask for help and dont understand that a kind thing can be just that. it slips into a sense of 'theres nothing for nothing in this world' which i dont like.

allhallows · 17/10/2007 08:33

looked up definition in an ancient copy of the Oxford dictionary:

"1.High respect; glory; reputation, good name; nobleness of mind. 2. Allegiance to what is right or to conventional standard of conduct;" etc.

Pan · 17/10/2007 08:36

Mais oui.

Supporting notions of respecting the good and potential for it in oneself and others, self-sacrificing, not always taking the easy road, facing up to difficulties.

and not snogging/shagging someone else's partner.

Original poster

TwigorTreat · 17/10/2007 08:41

"and not snogging/shagging someone else's partner" yes indeedy

OP posts:

nappiesLaGore · 17/10/2007 08:42

yep of course.

think the words are too often open to many (mistaken) interpretations.

but yes, when it comes down to it, self respect for being an honourable person is all we really have, no?

(ok, so spent many years being rilly rilly depressed and self analysed a LOT. and im flippnat b/c thats how i deal with it)

allhallows · 17/10/2007 08:42

tbh the Oxford definition doesn't do it for me. I prefer moopymoo's words: "self respect and personal responsibility and accountability" to which I would add respect for others. Keeping promises.

claricebeansmum · 17/10/2007 08:44

I see honour as standing up for what is right - morally even though it may not be the easy or preferred option.

MeMySonAndI · 17/10/2007 09:00

PErhaps I spent too much time being a Guide, but yes, it is very important to me, I don't feel comfortable with the idea of doing something unfair to anyone regardless of how they have acted towards me. Unfortunately, as not all the people think the same way, I do get a lot of occassions when I feel that I don't get as much as I give. IYWIM.

DoctorFrankenSquonk · 17/10/2007 09:01

what claricebeansmum said

Original poster

TwigorTreat · 17/10/2007 14:13

ethical self-analysis anyone

OP posts:

Lauriefairycake · 17/10/2007 14:19

I see honour as very important and what it means for me professionally (counsellor) is that I do what I say I'm going to do

3andnogore · 17/10/2007 14:27

Twigor indeed...a sense of honour and self respect is very important...and I suppose it is often lacking now...all seems to be about how something works for someone, how it will benefit them personally, rather then looking a bit further, etc...

fortyplus · 17/10/2007 14:29

I think 'honour' is as simple as always acting in an appropriate way in a given situation.

I can't bear unreliable people.

I can put my hand on my heart and say that - I make mistakes, but I always do what I believe to be right.

Flip