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If you've have a bad experience on a labour ward, come here and I'll try to help you

38 replies

hunkermunker · 15/10/2007 17:49

Every District Health Authority should have a Maternity Services Liaison Committee - in fact, a quick google of same brings up a raft of hospitals asking for parents to sit on their committees to improve maternity services.

Because that's what they're for - women who've had babies at the hospital feed back their experiences through the committees and those experiences inform new guidelines and standards of care.

One problem these committees face is getting women to talk about their experiences. I've done it, because I'm bolshy as anything and I must always have my say (you may have noticed...!). But I fully understand that had I had a worse experience, or been a less outspoken kind of person, it might have been impossible for me to have anything to do with the place it all happened.

So I thought I'd start a thread to encourage more women to talk about their experiences with their hospitals and support them to try to change things, either for the next time you have a baby, or for the women who use the maternity services after you.

You don't have to sit on the committee, you don't have to do anything other than write your experiences down and send either an email or a letter to the hospital. You can go through the Patient Liaison Service (PALS) (description of their work here).

Also,have a look here to see if your hospital is doing anything towards Babyfriendly status. There's a link on that link for you to write to the hospital to ask why they're not working towards it - the more people who write to ask, the more likely it is that they'll do it.

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SaintJude · 15/10/2007 17:53

how far back can you complain about an experience?

fishie · 15/10/2007 17:57

hooray yes all do this. i complained through PALS it was easy, i just spoke to them on phone, they drafted a letter which i edited and they sent in.

i got a written apology from head of midwifery, very satisfying and helpful to put a bad experience behind me.

hunkermunker · 15/10/2007 17:57

I would say there's no harm writing a letter about an experience years later, really. Ask that they explain how things are better now, perhaps, and apologise for the way you were treated, maybe? Will be cathartic writing it all down whatever.

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Lulumama · 15/10/2007 18:30

bump for Hunker

I am chair of our MSLC , and user rep for the monthly maternity care forums.

from what i have seen, the midwives, obs, paeds etc all very much want to provide the very best care they can, within the financial constraints of the NHS and do genuinley want to address problems and complaints re care.

even if complaining does not help you per se, it can certainly help make things better for future users of the service.

also, as hunker has said, writing it down can be really cathartic and valuable.

SaintJude · 15/10/2007 19:09

I was thinking about it from a legal point of view.....not for me....

Lulumama · 15/10/2007 19:12

i think it is 7 years to take legal action but child has 21 years if damage caused by care during birth etc

SaintJude · 15/10/2007 19:13

Damage to baby or mother?

Lulumama · 15/10/2007 19:15

damage to baby IIRC

if you ask teh question in legal/money matters, you might get a more coherent answer!!

hunkermunker · 15/10/2007 20:59

Not sure, SJ. Will google.

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Lizalu · 15/10/2007 21:22

I've always felt a bit dissatissfied with my care but there has been no obvious negligence - just a feeling things could have been handled better. For example with some help through my contractions I might not have been so stressed and tense and might not have had such a long labour. Can you complain about that sort of thing.

Lulumama · 15/10/2007 21:30

if you feel the care you received was not up to standard, then yes. i have some guidelines for our particular hospital, i imagine they are similar to everywhere else, tehy do talk about the importance of treating women in labour with dignity, respect and with respect of their wishe

minesalargeone · 15/10/2007 21:35

Does this include damage left to the Mum? Let's put this bluntly....sex is out of the question (too painful) and can't use tampons anymore (too painful) - I was badly stitched inside and out after delivering my last baby almost 4yrs ago. The woman who stitched me up even questioned whether or not she should be doing so to the midwife who'd just delivered my baby.

Lulumama · 15/10/2007 21:46

yes, it certainly does, if you had extensive tearing, it might be that it should have been repaired by someone very senior and experienced, if your sex life is affected, after 4 years, it certainly needs addressing.

hunkermunker · 15/10/2007 21:46

Lizalu, write it down - either on this thread or in a Word doc or something - then decide. It's healing just writing it all down, imo and ime.

MALO - go to the doctor and get referred - you can have an op that'll help massively. Do that and write to the hospital. They really need to remember that stitching isn't something that should be left to a passing janitor as seems to happen to a lot of women It has such a major impact on the rest of a woman's life.

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Lulumama · 15/10/2007 21:48

also see the thread in childbirth entitled 'birth trauma', there are some useful links on there

minesalargeone · 15/10/2007 21:53

yea but I'm a bit embarrassed to go and get it done tbh. I know I should've complained at the time but I was just glad to get the labour over and done with and have a healthy baby at the end of it all. My dh saw what a mess I was in when the midwife was busy with the baby (she was blue and not breathing) and really thought I was in a bad way. Because of the time of night (2am) they didn't have anyone else around to help stitch me up. It took almost an hour to sort me out. I was then left to climb down off the bed I'd delivered the baby on and told where the bathroom was. I waddled down the hallway with a big towel shoved between my legs (I was pouring with blood) and managed to climb into a shower to wash. I then continued bleeding for a few good hours and wasn't checked on again until the coffee trolley came round at 7am.

My life has never been the same since. I find tampons extremely uncomfortable and hate using towels. My sex life is non-existant and I'm only 39 and my dh is only 40.

I was told to go home at midnight on the night I delivered by dd - they told me they needed my bed and had emergency CS to deal with. I told them I was going nowhere - I'd been in labour for 3 days prior but because I was only 4cm and not progressing as quickly as they wanted and they wanted my bed they wanted me to leave. I stood my ground and ended up delivering dd at 2am, just 2hrs later and considering the hospital was 20 miles away I think I did the right thing.

I then ended up going back into hospital about two weeks later due to an infection caused by some of the sac being left behind which I had to have removed.

All in all a horrific time.

hunkermunker · 15/10/2007 22:36

MALO, is your GP any good? If not, is there another one you can see at the practice? Please, please, please don't let a bit of embarrassment stand in the way of resuming your life

Your experience sounds horrific - you poor thing Do contact the PALS at your hospital. They'll be useful, I'm sure.

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Heathcliffscathy · 15/10/2007 22:40

god hunker, have only read your OP, but why on gods earth aren't all hospitals at least working towards babyfriendly status???? WTF? London???? very depressing reading. evidently you have to live in dorset.

hunkermunker · 15/10/2007 22:47

Money. Entrenched views in high places. Chief Execs who don't put women and babies anywhere up their priority list, so won't release funds for training.

The London stats are shocking, but mostly that's because they are SO SO SO busy that the Babyfriendly stuff is pie in the sky. They're proper conveyor belts, a lot of the time. No excuse for poor treatment of women, but it's easy to see how it happens in short-staffed units with lots of bank staff.

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fishie · 16/10/2007 09:06

hm i'm afraid a lot of the staff just don't care though. i'd love to think it is all down to resources but my experience was that they were entirely content with their standard of bf support (ignorant and useless). since i was there they've introduced a buddy system, where pg women are mentored by others from same cultural background. hardly a fully trained bf counsellor is it though?!

i have written to chief exec as you suggest, will be interesting to see what the response is.

jamila169 · 16/10/2007 09:15

The reason for all this is that women don't shout loud enough - How often have you heard from someone that they had a horrific experience and then they qualify it by saying 'but my baby's fine so that's all that matters'
No it bloomin well is not!!!!!! things like poor repairs,PTSD,physical problems are called Morbidity in the world of medicine - they are the undesirable, life affecting consequences of an event (birth) which are supposed to be included in the stats for outcomes - HP's need to have this stuff shoved in their faces (esp OB's because they seem to be responsible for a great dealof it) to see that what is done or not done has a massively damaging impact on every area of a woman's life.
Grrrr - can't you tell I've not had my coffee this morning
Lisa x

MegaLegs · 16/10/2007 09:25

St Richard's Chichester were I had my four has full accreditation for the Babyfriendly scheme (Davina was there giving them a certifiate a couple of years ago as I was literally having DS4 - she didn't pop up to say hello)

My experiences were OK with 1,2 and 3 although each had it's bad moments (snappy, overstretched MWs mainly not what you need in the hours after birth though) Less happy with DS4 fiasco.

Still, they are trying, it is generally a good unit but, guess what, now we are fighting to keep it open (we're marching next Sat, my sisters and I were all born there too)

MegaLegs · 16/10/2007 09:26

its not it's, damn.

hunkermunker · 16/10/2007 12:30

Fishie, that's part of the reason women need to complain - otherwise that sort of attitude becomes entrenched and the norm and women get a worse and worse deal. It's not just about resources, I know, but unless more is done to address the resource-deficit, the attitude shift that's needed in many units across the country won't happen.

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hunkermunker · 16/10/2007 14:29

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