Need advice

[Buddy0987]

I’m. Ot sure wots going on in my head

Ok 2020 April my husband of 31 years died of covid 19 ,I totally in disbelief this could happen to us considering we lost our daughter just 3 years ago leaving my 2 sons aged 25 & 14 ,can’t quite believe this has happened,so 50 years old and I find myself totally alone,the man I chose to spend my life with is dead ,I’m left with just two sons and me we’re do I turn too,first I run to we’re it begun my mothers home no one there, sh e died a couple of years ago ( we weren’t close the last 15 years) the council estate I grew up on ( it looked so different) I found myself just feeling totally lost like a spare part,my sons are doing their best to be there for me however I’m just on my own and for some strange reason I feel I’m back there 1987 with a lad that I thought felt the same way as me ( I was wrong) but I’m finding myself searching social media for him,Hell how’s he going to help me ! He was bad news then when I was a young pretty innocent girl,now 30 years later “what the hell am I thinking” god he probably wouldn’t even recognise me know ,( iv more than likely walked past him in the street) why on earth am I looking for him , good chance he’s married and settled with children and with wife( he never seemed the settling down type) is this grief am I looking to the past to help me deal with the Present ,I have no idea what’s going on in my head Help needs ASAP thanks in advance xxxxx

Focus on your children. You should be there for them, not the other way round, especially in the case of your 14 year old.

Ye yr right ,I know what yr saying I should be there for the children ,I. Just not sure how to be there for them x

@soundsfishie

Focus on your children. You should be there for them, not the other way round, especially in the case of your 14 year old.

I must add my sons we’re 25 & 14 when my daughter died that’s was years ago their noeW 28 & 17