Hi, new on here so may be posting on the wrong but. Always been taught 'not to hang my dirty washing out' but I feel like what is the point in life at the moment.
We have 3 children, the youngest at college, he's no problem. Our middle daughter left for uni last weekend, she is the most caring & cuddlest of them & it's breaking my heart that's she's gone but I know she has to do her own thing. I've been shielding since March do the covid bit stressing me out, and her too. Not being able to visit & the doubt that she may not be allowed home for Christmas is killing me.
Our eldest daughter has always been feisty, until last year when she had her heart broken & now she has all kinds of mental health issues. I've kind of gone crazy in the last few weeks with naggy hand washing, use your sanitiser etc & with my eldest 'who are you with?' she's 23 & staying out till 4am. I can't sleep till she's in. We feel out via text 2 weeks ago & she hasn't spoken to me since. I spent so many nights laying with her & talking to her when she's been down, this feels like a kick in the guts. Last night she came home drunk with 2 friends (our home has been our safe place since march, even no grandad is allowed in) They were upstairs, in the bathroom, in our uni daughters room & I went to say enough is enough when I found our daughter vomiting in the garden. She'd had a 4 hour binge on zambuka & whiskey. She kept saying she hates this. She refused to stay home & has now been her friends for 2 nights. Now I'm panicking about her bringing covid in as where she is is like a party house (the mum gets drunk alot & charges her girls cash rent) Our daughter has alot of money of money saved & I'm worried they will take advantage. It feels like 2 weeks ago I had a loving house & now I'm alone. Struggling to see what the point of life is. My husband said he'd talk to her but kept saying he was too busy, now it's too late. I know she has to leave one day but she's so small & vulnerable.