DD on MSN

[jampot]

My dd is currently logged on to her MSN account but is away doing her homework so I've come upstairs to "sneak a little peek" at Mumsnet and see she has a message waiting. I see its from a boy she used to go to school with and who messages her virtually every day. Hes invited her to start an audio conversation but 'cos she's not here she hasn't responded so his next message is "fuck u". I am livid and really feel like telling his mum (she would be horrified) - am I overreacting?

How old is she?

How old is DD, jampot?

oh, oh - dangerous territory - I'd leave it I were you - your dd will accuse of snooping (I know you weren't but thats what she'll think).

Lets face it we all know some kids use these words - for bravado or whatever but I think if you say anything you'll end up with conflict. Its annoying but thats all (I think).

Hope no offence is taken.

sorry - I'm assuming they are teenagers?

She's still at primary school I think...DS2 is 11 and I have the impression that that age does swear in texts and messages, possibly even more than older ones do.

I don't think I'd tell his mum but you could casually mention it to DD - I mean you are shocked, so you could tell her you are, but without making it sound as if you are angry with her or with him (even though you are angry with him!)

She's 11 (yr 7 so just secondary) - She has shown me comments (not quite so blunt) he has made before with less intense words in them

Tell his mum

oh - thats a bit different then. Still difficult though - depends how well you know his mum, I mean people take offence easily and the instinct to protect your own child is a strong one - what I mean is she may go on the defensive (obviously you've got your dd best interests at heart). Perhaps if you just said 'inappropriate language' rather than using the actual word?

Or what about have a 'quiet' word with the boy - make him know you're aware - that might scare him into stopping.

Bl@@dy msn ... my two dss's are addicted to it... but then I'm addicted to mumsnet too
I'd leave it TBH, as it could cause your dd problems at school and you don't want that do you? I am quite broad-minded but even I'm shocked at some of the things they say to each other on there and some of the names - well . BTW my youngest dss was having a bit of trouble with one boy on msn, swearing at him, etc., so I sat there and had a very interesting conversation with him ... it was ages before he realised who was actually talking to

Jampot - not sure if I could let this go at your DD's age. She may be cross with you but it is awful for her to be "spoken" to like this.

MSN - scourge that it is...

Message withdrawn

Thanks for your replies ladies - I showed it to dd and she was a bit shocked (yeah right) and then I responded to it by saying "Hi X, I;ll just go get Ellie now" and the cheeky blighter responded "thx" (thanks)!!! They don;'t go to the same school but have decided not to say anything to his mum - when I next see him I'll have a quiet word with him

my daughter also 11 uses msn and the language is appauling.the computer is in the front room so i tell her to tell the (upto 6 people at once) who she is speaking to to cut it out or i will put you off. they then cut it out.

i have also typed in " this is emmas mum, cut it out or i will make sure i print out this conversation and show your mothers at school"

my kids hate me