Halloween - Is it just me or does anyone else object to trick or treating?

[Stripymouse]

I must admit that while I know halloween parties can be great fun (and have held/been to a few corkers over the years) I loathe Halloween. Every year that night comes round and I know what will happen. Early on you get a few cute younger children all excited and dressed up with parent in tow eager to collect a sweet or two. Then, after a gap of an hour or so you start to get big groups of teenagers in no costume other than horrific mask shouting and banging on the door demanding "cash or food". Ignore them and you get your home attacked, open the door and you get nothing but arrogance or cheek. Last year one group of boys were not impressed that I refused to give out money and only had a few fun bars left in the bag so floured and egged our car anyway. No point phoning police as they are being inundated with people phoning with much worse. Stupid thing is that we live in a lovely quiet village! I really feel for my elderly neighbours who are terrified so go to bed early, don?t sleep a wink and rush down in the morning to worry over any damage or clearing up that needs doing.
Why do we all allow kids to do this? I won?t allow my girls to go trick or treating as I believe it amounts to nothing more than blackmail and extortion and causes real misery. Am I alone in this or am I a "party pooper" and should "lighten up" about the whole thing as my sister suggests?

Dont tell anyone but we take the battries out of our door bell. Not cos we are spoil sports or dont think the little ones should have fun but it wakes the baby and the costumes scare the toddler. Its just too much to deal with at the end of the day

tallulah, when they do that here - we wish you a merry christmas I mean - I open the door, loom majestically above them and demand that they sing at least 1 verse of a proper carol, with all the right words, and in tune. If they can then I will give them some money but most of them can't!

Halloween was quiet last year - we got stuck with loads of leftover mini choc bars

cp3, I really don't see why you should have an embarrassed face on that post! Why the hell should you deal with all that!

When I was little you got kids coming to the door saying 'penny for the guisers'. I think it was a Scottish thing. If they wanted anything, they had to sing a song or tell a joke. If they didn't, they got nothing.
I never got to go out guising or trick or treating, my parents didn't agree with chapping strangers doors for sweets.
I do whole heartedly object to gangs of kids roaming the streets asking for money and sweets. I always ignore the door. People we know will go round the back of the house if they want in. Neighbours and friends kids get a little thing but not random teenagers whose effort starts and finishes with a Scream mask.
Anyone object to the amount costumes cost? Why don't people make them anymore?

I make my dd (3) it always ends up costing more than buying one.

That could be down to my extravagent dd with her equally extravagent mother. This year she wanted to be a witch so took her to the fabric shop and according to dd all witches dresses are made of sequins with a taffeta underskirt!

I have seen that mask stripymouse, we went to a party last year and a boy had one and all the smaller kids were terrified!

Howvever the pointy is to be scary, just wish he had kept it between him and his mates of a similar age rather than tormenting toddlers with it!

I hate it (not Hallowe'en - just the trick or treating). Thankfully, I have never been "tricked" for refusing to participate. The thing that really shocks me are the gangs of unsupervised young children dragging about the streets after dark, knocking on total strangers' doors.

I'm afraid I am decidedly Grinch-like in my behaviour on Hallowe'en - I take the batteries out of the doorbell, draw the curtains, and refuse to go to the door!

The other thing that drives me mad are the kids who just bang on my front door (as of NOW, ie., beginning of October) and go "Trick or Treat!" - not even dressed up.

my oldest son (10) is dead set on gettin one of those scream masks with blood you can pump up

He won't get one as we have a big bag full of halloween stuff already.

Nikkim, you dd sounds like a witch with a touch of Sabrina. I bet she looks dead cute!

I know Halloween is trad in Ireland, we used to have a great time if we were on holiday there to visit cousins etc BUT I don't remember anyone going trick or treating.

Marthamoo - agree with your outlook on unsupervised kids. I hate to see kids with no-one with them, do people think it is safer just cause it is halloween. I always go with my kids and we only go to houses that they are known in. As for the rowdies that let off bangers starting October 1st. Don't get me started.

oh my goodness, I can't believe their are so many people who hate halloween! Also can't believe that I lived in south london for years and never experienced a single unpleasant 't and t'er yet there are some of you who are harrassed who live in villages ! I love it and do a party for my little boy every year. My husband and I make pumpkins and put them in the window to show we are up for rings on the bell. when I run out of sweets I simply remove the pumpkin and don't answer the door. We make pumpkin pie every year and rent scary movies. I find it so much fun I really do, but it would be much less so if I was getting plagued by evil teenagers. I hope it goes well for those of you suffering, and look forward to my fix of pumpkin pie ! xx

I had no idea that Halloween was a) so popular, and b) so horrible in the UK.

I enjoy it and the kids love it. Some people do make costumes, but I always buy them, because I'm not at all creative and if I attempted it the girls would look awful! I did just buy their costumes on Ebay this year, so saved a bit of money. DD1 (5) is going to be Ariel, the little mermaid, and DD2 (2.5) is going to be Dora the Explorer.

I agree with the Americans that over here Halloween is a fun, neighbourly kind of thing. Money is never involved, but people do sometimes give out stickers or something in an attempt to minimise the amount of chocolate. People will always give out store-bought candy, not homemade, for the reasons Tex described. (Although if you know where to get those tequila filled chocolates, let me know.)

The young kids never go trick or treating without an adult. The adult will usually stand on the pavement watching while the kids go up to the front door.

And there are never any actual "tricks". Some of the older kids come in dubious costumes and just grab as many handfuls of sweets as they can and don't say thank you or anything, but that's the worst of it.

I hate it and never allowed DS1 out trick or treating

I would compromise on giving out treats, but we have a border collie / labrador cross and when the little monkeys ring the bell, she sticks her head out of the cat flap and barks ferociously (she's incredibly gentle, but they don't know that!). So they end up at the bottom of the drive. If they can stay at the door, they get a treat!

I think the tradition has been distorted in this country, and now you get trick-or-treating yob style in a way you never (or rarely) see in America. There just isn't that level of cynnicism in the US, I suppose. In addition, US teenagers usually have better things to do; they'd tend to see Halloween as analogous with childhood and babyishness and would therefore rather die than be associated with it (in general). Whereas teenagers here are fairly new to Halloween and don't have that frame of reference.

I can well understand how a native Brit would feel annoyed that this tradition had been foisted upon them. And what you describe, stripymouse, is absolutely unacceptable, and I'd be inclined to call the police under those circumstances. But I can also see how a homesick American family would want to carry on this tradition when living abroad. Halloween is deeply important to American children, almost equal in weight to something like Christmas, and it really can be a beautiful thing when done properly without the "trick" nonsense: creative costumes, imaginative parties, real joy in children's faces.

I feel like I should offer an apology for its getting out of hand in this country because it really shouldn't be the way you're describing at all.

I agree with others who talk about putting a pumpking out to signal a "trick or treat friendly" house. That's usually what's done in the US.

The American Halloween that sticks in my mind is the one in ET - that was very sweet!

Agree Jan - if it was like it looked in ET (all neighborly!) I would have no objections.

And I'm not a total killjoy - one of my friends has a Hallowe'en party every year and we all dress up and go (I made ds1 a fab Mummy outfit last year out of a ripped up sheet). It's just walking down the road to get there I want to carry a sign saying "We are not Trick or Treating: we are going to a party!"

Yes, I always think of the one in ET too The American School in London is not far from here and I know they distribute a list of friendly addresses each year and respect the pumpkin in the window message AND have lots of fun!

Blimey, I can see why lots of people hate it if the behaviour is like that, but it's not that bad all through the UK, honest! (and expatkat, I really don't think you need to apologise ). We have lots of trick or treaters, some younger children with their parents and lots of older children in small groups, but they certainly don't play tricks. They always do something- tell you a joke or a story, play a musical instrument, tell your fortune, and then they get sweets or whatever in return. It's very neighbourly and friendly- there are some teenagers, and they tend to do little song routines, but we haven't had anybody threatening. I think it's merged with the Scottish tradition of geysing, so maybe that's why it's more good-humoured.

Last year dd went as Dorothy with Toto in her basket, this year she's going to be an angel. Ds tends to be more horrible, Frankenstein or similar.

And I don't get why its just general fancy dress and doesn't have to be scary/ghoulish etc

"Halloween is deeply important to American children"

My American kids don't miss Hallowe'en at all, but then we never made a big thing of it, or decorated the house - we just went along with the school-mandated costume parties and the city-sanctioned T-or-T 90 minutes (then it was the sweets rather than the costumes that were important to them). That belongs "over there", and they are perfectly adaptable to the traditions of "over here" (Bonfire night was ace last year for them).

Hate it, hate it, hate it!

We were never allowed to go as kids as my mum saw it as begging. I dont let ds go either.
My experience of it is teenagers using it as an excuse to play "tricks" on people.

I've never understood why anyone would let their kids wander the street anyway and not know where they were or what they were doing.

I can understand America though if it is done properly.

Wow, no wonder you hate it in the UK. Around here (oregon), the big trend is to trick-or-treat the businesses for probably the last 10 years. That way the littler ones can get it out of the way earlier in the day, and its mostly the upper ages of t or t'ers that come out at night. I've rarely seen kids without their parents going from door to door, and as for vandalism, I've only seen it happen a few times, and that was mostly by drunk adults.

Have to admit I love halloween but I love any excuse to watch kids dress up and have a party. I have also been lucky enough never to have had any bad trick or treaters experiences, infact last year got loads of chocolates in and only had one caller. Something friends have complained about although I have never exprienced is kids wanting money rather than sweets. That would make me feel uneasy, it is for that reason that I don't like penny for the guy, especially when the kids have clearly gone to no effort with the guy and it is just an excuse to beg. the worst ones here are when kids are doing penny for a guy outside the bookies or pub and you see the parents come out and take the money and then disappear into the pub/ bookies again.

When I lived in Yorkshire the kids have mischief night which was a nightmare, invloved all the tricks with no treats.

My dd is three and will be having a halloween party, will be doing face painting dressing up, scary food, apple bobbing and getting marshmallows out of icing sugar with their teeth. WE thought about a few adults taking them trick or treating just on our road but am not sure. What do others think?