We've lived together for five years and it's been tumultuous. We have a near sex-less relationship. He tells me that he loves me all the time but he doesn't really show it or affection. I don't have anywhere else to go with my kids or I'd be there already but I know I still love him for some odd reason that I've yet to figure out. Yet, I still know that I am so miserable being with him and not getting what I want, trying to make him happy and never being paid attention to. It's like he is intentionally pushing me away on purpose. When something gets brought up he often says I know you'll leave me once you get on your feet like that's what he wants me to do but on the other hand he acts like a wounded puppy if I don't pay attention to him so its very conflicting. He was having ED problems but this morning I caught him masturbating so he apparently doesn't have them on his own only with me. Makes you wonder if there's no attraction or what the issues are. When I try to talk to him and open communication like doctors and therapists suggest, he says mean things and tries to say stuff to hurt me like I won't work (I do work..I pay most of the bills :/) or that I complain too much...all because I actually tried to talk to him about things that are making me consider cheating on him even though I'm not a cheating type. But, it's like when a person won't talk to you or make love to you or do anything with you and then gets mad when you say hey what's going on and how can we fix it...what other choice do you have? I won't cheat cause I'm a loyal woman with value for myself but I'm really unhappy and I'm not quite sure how to change it. But, I am like you in that I'm stuck living with someone because of financial problems or become homeless. So, I do love him but it's dying and I didn't want it to but now I'm not so sure and I don't want to be homeless. I'm waiting for an apartment to open up for me and then I will move into it with my kids but he wants to come with us and I'm not so sure I want him to now.