I spent years in private rent and the last landlord I had was awful.
For my health and other needs, I was advised by my medical team that I should apply for council housing, my experience is good all round, I applied in the 3rd week of March and was allocated a house just 4 weeks later. However it wasn't ready for me for another 6 months as needed some adaptions which by the time I had moved in, I had detoriated to past needing what was done and am now waiting for another place with is expected to be ready in April next year. I know that's not relevant to you but that's my experience.
No idea what country you are in the UK, I'm in NI. Points are allocated based on various criteria. I didn't get as far as the complex needs assessment before I got to bid on the present house and got accepted. I got offered this house at 15 points.
You are pregnant, in very cramped conditions, its causing stress to you and the baby, and your partner as the baby's other parent. There is a history of your MIL making you both homeless in the past, (as sleeping on friends sofas etc you become hidden homeless), you need somewhere secure for the sake of you and your baby and your partner has been emotionally abused over years (backed up by social service investigations). Your partner is on anti-depressants and you are living in a "walking on eggshells" situation as constantly in fear she will throw you out.
From a safety perspective, the fact there is so little room "it's at the point where we can only get in and out by getting on the bed and getting off the other side", take photos of that, use those with your application as if the room is so small, it is potentially a risk in the event of a fire for both of you as adults to be there if you have to climb over a bed to get out, never mind the risk to trying to get a baby out safely also.
Good to see you have put an application in with the council as that is the start.
I'm sure your partner is "on eggshells" as well as wants to be with you and have space for you and baby and have your life together.
Where you are is unsafe due to lack of space, the potential for emotional abuse of both of you, dangerous for baby as don't have space at all (as having to climb across beds to access room), will be in a volatile unstable situation and can potentially be made homeless at any point. She has in the past made you both homeless and that is even worse with a baby on way and potential for it to happen again.
You might be lucky and offered something fairly quickly however it may not be in the area you are in now, to be completely honest, it sounds like she is toxic in that she has made you homeless in the past and emotionally abused her son to the point to warrant social services input on several occasions during his growing up.
Between now and the appointment for council next week, make GP appointments both of you. The one for you is to ask the GP to note how the strain of all this is affecting you and in turn potentially affecting the baby (if you are constantly stressed and on edge, baby gets the effects), also discuss with Midwife and any other health workers who will know you are stressed and why, they will know the potential effect on baby.
The one for your partner is to ask for supportive evidence of the history of social services intervention due to his mother and also explain the reason he is on anti-depressants if her treatment is a factor as well as noting the stress of unstable housing.
The friends and family members who put you up during that 3 months timescale, ask them to write supportive letters with regard to what has happened in the past and their assessment on the potential for it to happen again. Even if they were only able to put you up a couple of nights due to their own tenancies, get them to explain that as you cant fall back on them, it all helps as you dont have a safe net.
The incident where you had to call the police, that was due to an explosive row (volatile living environment), even thought MILs partner was involved, as if he is triggered off rows to the point where police are needed, that is not good for both of you much less a baby in the midst. Can you get in touch with police and get an incident number for that also if possible the name of the officer who dealt with it.
" in the end, she agreed to let us stay with her again upon finding out I'd actually had a miscarriage (we didn't know I was pregnant until I went to the doctors over the whole thing and they told us both what was happening." The stress of being homeless while pregnant wouldn't have helped you overall, even you didn't know you were actually pregnant.
How is your MIL around babies? She may see herself as grandma but when a baby is crying and doing all the baby things esp as they start to become more aware of the world around them, things can be noisy. Is she really going to tolerate that esp night after night? Babies make noise, that's a fact. If her partner is staying over, how does he tolerate them.
Babies are lovely but they are also very hard work and can make noise when you least expect it and lots of smells, which if you have to keep everything in your room where you are having to crawl across it with baby literally in your arms is unsafe. Physically and emotionally.
This week your partner has lost his job, he needs to apply for JSA asap. www.gov.uk/jobseekers-allowance and also do a benefits checker together to see if can claim anything else, check also in case your area is UC area and go thru the calculator for that too.
Also when you are at 29/30 weeks, remember to apply for this - www.gov.uk/sure-start-maternity-grant and as you are on a low income and need to give the baby the best nutrients possible, www.gov.uk/healthy-start -
Contact Shelter to see if they have any other advice as in my honest opinion and I did a stint in sheltered housing and working with people on the streets, this is not a good environment for both of you as parents to bring a new baby home to.
You need a bit of space, more than you have now and what about when the baby is crying and MIL partner gets annoyed and kicks off another row which needs the police.
Even if housed temporary away from there, I think would be a weight off your shoulders, contact Shelter and also gather up as much evidence for your case that you should be on the housing list and why you meet the criteria for points. Look up your local authority as they should publish their points criteria.
Congratulations on your pregnancy
By the sounds of it, I think council housing would be your best bet as the rent is low and at least where I am once you have been a tenant for a year, you are secure and as long as rent is paid, its usually quite good from there on.