WHAT WOULD YOU DO IN MY SITUATION WITH UNPROFESSIONAL HV?

[BaffledByBabyTights]

One of my friends works in the same surgery as my HV, and last week she got very very drunk and told me that the HV has been saying things about me to the other staff, saying 'she rams her intelligence down my throat' (I have no idea what she means by that - I certainly don't go around saying or thinking 'I'm clever'), and 'It's clear she doesn't like me', and the friend says she often discusses the characters of other parents and colleagues. I am very cross about it, and would love to make a formal complaint about her, but I cannot see how to do it without getting my friend into serious trouble for repeating it. So, oh wise mn-ers, what would YOU do??!!

I agree with Cod, she was off duty and why do you give a shit anyway? She's an HV, not someone important. And you should be complimented that she's scared of your intelligence.

;look not eeryone lieks folk
just giver her a wide berth
you dont liek her
whats ht issue

If your HV was with colleagues then she was talking with other fellow professionals. It is your friend who has been exceptionally unprofessional - as well as being extraordinarily bitchy - to tell you.

She has not only upset you but is likely to also upset her colleague.

You shouldn't do or say anything.

You might wish to consider why your HV would talk about you like this. Or why your friend would choose to tell you.

Silly of friend to repeat nasty things. Doesn't sound like a really horrible thing, just a bit mean - god i'm sure professionals in our lives say the odd mean thing about us - we do about them! Try not to be upset by it - she doesn't have to like you, she just has to do her job properly. I'd probably just avoid tactless friend.

She wasn't off duty, VSS, and COD, I would love to give her a wide birth but this is a small pond. Ans I wasn't aware all issues on here had to me 'worthwhile' - just chatting and mulling it over with folk here - if it annoys you, give my thread a wide berth

er am i missing something? you and cod had scrappyscrap????

I think you probably make your friend a bit insecure because she thinks you're cleverer than her, and this was her way of telling you that. Is very playground tactics really. Take a long, hard look at the friend.

I'd just left the room they were both in after having dd's first immunisations. Friend was hatstand drunk on Tues when she told me, and was in the mood for revealing all sorts of secrets, and also told me what HV had said about other colleagues and patients.

It does break her code of conduct.

In which case it is definitely your friend who is being unprofessional

i agree with the others - sounds like your friend's behaviour has been far worse in terms of confidentiality etc.

yes, I guess you are right. Oops, better go, baby threatening to drown the neighbours telly with screams, and DH not having much success at quietening her.... Thanks for the advice guys, have a good evening.

5 As a registered nurse, midwife or specialist community
public health nurse, you must protect confidential information
5.1 You must treat information about patients and clients as confidential
and use it only for the purposes for which it was given. As it is
impractical to obtain consent every time you need to share
information with others, you should ensure that patients and clients
understand that some information may be made available to other
members of the team involved in the delivery of care. You must guard
against breaches of confidentiality by protecting information from
improper disclosure at all times.

no AND we are all entitled to our opinions are we not?

It's not confidential information, though. It's an opinion. She hasn't done anything wrong from a professional pov.

I agree that your friend is the worst offender here. How utterly nasty of her to put you in this position. I'd re-evaluate the friendship asap!

"It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you to the heart: the one to slander you and the other to get the news to you."

Mark Twain

Never has a truer word been spoken!

Completely agree that it is your "friend" who is in the wrong here. Why did she tell you? IMO it is pretty normal to talk about things like this with colleagues. It isn't however normal for said colleagues to spill. Did the HV know that you were friends with her colleague?

i agree your friend was being ridiculous

i would not complain about the hv but if it really pisses you off say something to hv next time you see her that makes her squirm a little - not sure what - maybe - 'i think you need to be more discreet - i heard from a friend you had been discussing me' - she can't do much about it as she is in the wrong - i guess she will just squirm and try to lie low!