How to help unhappy friend

[kkgirl]

Didn't know exactly where to post this, maybe relationships??

Anyway, one of my friends, who is normally like a human tornado, plenty of enthusiasm and energy, has been unhappy for over a week now. Basically, she is dissatisfied with lack of money, she works part time due to having two children.

I spoke to her this morning and found it difficult to know how to cheer her up. She is always on holiday, had 2 weeks in Florida last year, a week in Ibiza this year and two weeks in Cornwall, and camping as often as possible. She is unhappy with her house as well as she doesn't have any money to update things, what can I say to help her

Sorry the only idea I can come up with is really stupid. Buy her a lottery ticket for tonight. 9 million rollover!!!!

stop going on holiday maybe and use the money to update your house??

send me round i will depress her further

but seriously just listen and be a good friend to her, like you sound. I am sure if you are understanding it will 'just' help

message withdrawn

Blu! ikwym

Blu? did I miss something?

Blimey, I find it hard enough when two sets of retired parents tell me how bored and skint they are! those two holidays to Jamaica etc. each year really knock the stuffing out of them, and they find it very irritating that there are not many English speaking people there when they do go (but that is another story ).

I know camping is cheap but many of us haven't holidayed like your friend for years. As Twiglett suggested, perhaps forego a holiday or two and get some paint etc from B&Q instead - about £14 for a tin of D???x I think.

You must be a wonderful friend and she is very lucky xxx

i meant twiglett

he he

Phew! I thought I'd started posting without knowing it....

Kkgirl - is she unhappy for some other reason? Is she depressed? While most of us have a good maon from time to tiem about lack of new curtains/kitchen/sofa/whatever, it isn't usual for those kinds of things to cause real unhappiness, certainly not for a whole week without let-up.

It sounds as if she is in a rut or depressed and running around the woprld on different holidays, but none will make her happy because she is somehow unhappy with some other aspect of her life, or with herself.

Can you take her out for a quiet coffee and ask her some different qustions?

she sounds like she's either not sensible with her money or she's trying to cheer herself up as something else is bothering her. I know if I get quite down, I go spend money that I dont usually have to try and cheer myself up.

I don't know what to say to her. I earn more than her working less hours, but my house is a tip. We spend a lot of activities for our kids, and probably more than we should on day to day living, but I am not bothered about foreign holidays, and my house decorating programme ceased about 7 years ago. DH can't be bothered with it and I have so little time that I have started ds's room and dd's room and not finished them. It irritates me, but I don't need to keep up with the Joneses, am not jealous of other people generally, and am happy with what I have.
At the end of the day, i think if you earn 10 grand a week, you would just find more expensive things to spend it on.

I don't feel very symphathetic to my friend, I have tried to support her and emphasise that she is lucky, but to no avail

is she a single mum?

kkgirl, you sound exasperated?