Would you want to know if you were recognised??

[JeremyVile]

Because I think i know someone on MN from RL, well actually i know i do, we used to work together.
My first thought when i realised was "ooh how exciting i'll give her a nudge".
We used to get on really well but i wouldn't say we were friends as such. We had a laugh at work but that was it. She left and we didn't stay in touch.
But she's a regular poster and some of her posts have been fairly personal. The last thing i would want is for her to be embarrassed, and i know that for a lot of people the beauty of MN is that its anonymous.
It would be great to catch up and i would certainly have no intention of bringing up any of her issues but my over-riding feeling is that its probably best left alone just incase.
So if it were you would you want to know?
I cant really answer my own question as i'm a cowardly name-changer for really personal issues !(for the very fact that someone may know me in RL who i wouldn't otherwise have chosen to share my problems with).

I don't understand how you can be so sure that you've recognised people.

So far no.
(am now thinking this thread was a bad idea).
It didn't even occur to me that it might cause paranoia, divvy that i am

Only 1 person NFK.
And there's no doubt.
For what its worth i think shes fab, in RL as well as as a poster.

NKF

Just looked at your profile and nearly babbed myself!
You are a spitting image of someone I worked with but am pretty sure its not you lol.

How strange.

CAT them.

Really heifer?

I think if I recognised someone on here I would keep quiet about it tbh - well not contact them in RL anyway

I think I'd keep quiet anyway. Oh god, I don't really know tbh - it would be a real dilemna!

Just CAT them.
If they've posted really personal stuff on here, I'm sure they'll appreciate you telling them in private rather than broadcast to the whole of MN that you know her.

I'd want to know.

Cat her - she doesn't have to reply if she doesn't want to.

NBG - "nearly babbed myself" lol!!
Never had any links with your area, so i dont think so.

Have been all over though

Oh god i would never just announce, would never out someone, thats just not on.
Now by this thread i've made it seem a bigger deal than it is. The couple of personal things ive seen her post aren't anything shocking at all. Probably the sort of thing we'd all mention down the pub or in the office. The point is i dont feel i have the right to take away her anonymity.
And tbh, if i come across any of her posts, i think of her first and foremost as her MN persona just like everyone else (it just happens that i also knew her in person).

OK, i haven't seen her around.
Quick show of hands, should i ask for this thread to be deleted?
I just feel really guilty about it all now. Didn't think it through properly before posting.

Awwwww JV, you sound very considerate.
If you dont feel comfortable just leave it. Maybe in time she will recognise you and contact you.
Or maybe shes sat at home thinking of starting a thread like this

Oooh, didn't recognise your pics Nbg, but been in the London/Kent area?

Nope never

Pmsl!

I wouldn't ask for the thread to be deleted. It is a dilemma that a lot of us will face at some point. Tis a good thread to have around.

If she sees it, she may realise it is her that you are talking about and get in touch herself.

everything I post on here I do so on the assumption that someone could work out who I am. so if someone did I think I'd be neutral as to whether or not they told me. I have one very close friend who does post on here - we've never discussed names!

Nbg - I've just looked at your profile - your children are just adorable!

Actually, although I occasionally look at other peoples profiles I don't think I would ever do one myself unless I was happy to be identified.

If people put pics on their profiles then surely they're not trying to hide themselves.

Good point NKF.

Thank you Mercy

(beat that)

Blimey, how did you type that so quickly?

Well obviously, but I think it's also easy to forget that MN isn't a private club with a set of rules, etiquette, whatever the right term is.