My brother the alcoholic and over doses

[Lalameme]

Hi my brother is 51 he is a chronic alcoholic
Our father was a chronic alcoholic but violent too we grew up watching him beat out Mum badly daily for 11 years

My brother keeps asking us for money he’s had so much from me I can no longer afford to give him it. He keeps taking small over doses to get to hospital in hope they will detox him but he’s been detox twice this year alone and many times before.
This plays on my emotions that we’ve all tried to help him but he can’t atop drinking - my 22 year old son in law hung himself 4 weeks ago and my brother keep taking over doses is such a strain.
I’ve always been there for him but I can’t hekp him and he has been told by professionals to cut down the drink until another detox comes
But I don’t think they’re give him anymore he had one 4 weeks ago and then stated drinking

I’m not sure what’s the best thing to do I simply don’t ah e the money I have a family to feed ?

Google The Sinclair Method and see if you can convince him to try it.

Alcoholism is such a selfish disease. @Melliegrantfirstlady, what does that even mean? A disease cannot be selfish. Or are you just paying lip service to the idea of it being a disease, but still want to have a dig at the sufferer?

Give him the details of the local AA group they will give him support and even if he does'nt believe in it all theres people there he can talk to.
Tell him that only he can help himself and that you cant give him anymore money. Tell him what you have told us here you have a family yourself to feed and that you have emotional problems yourself to deal with.
Write it down and send him a letter or email, then you wont be getting into arguments with him.Practice saying no in front of a mirror or with other family and if hes persistant then just block him until he sorts himself out.

What a horrible statement @mellie.

My brother is an alcoholic and drug addict, and my mum struggled so much to stop giving him money and was essentially enabling him. She found a local support group for family members of people with substance abuse problems and it has really given her the strength to set healthy boundaries with him.

The NHS have a website which can give you the contact details of your nearest support group, or if you just google it there are quite a few other support systems out there like this one

www.adfam.org.uk/

I think what you need right now is someone to really talk to about everything you have been through and are going through.

Also , I also lost a family member this way last week so I understand the hardship you are going through right now x

Thankyou for all your replies and I’m sorry for those who have also suffered the effects of a loved ones addiction

He goes to AA and another group where we live he’s was dry last year for 9 months got a job but failed to stay dry

Actually that sounds a good idea me finding a group to get help for myself I’m just so drained and every little thing is making me either cry or cross atm

I appreciate your replies Thankyou xx

www.al-anonuk.org.uk/.
Theres these as well for the families of alcoholics.Hope you manage to get some support.

Al-anon for you lovely. Support and friendship in spades. That's what you need right NOW. Sending love and healing vibes.

Under the desk

I am genuinely sorry if my comment upset you.

I will report it to mumsnet for deletion