Am I unreasonable (Moi Non!!)

[Twinkie]

x2b has decided that he wants his with of a mother or my stepmonster to pick DD up from school each Friday on the weekends he has her as he can;t get there due to his new job - I don't want this at all - if it were down to me neither of his parents or mine for that matter would have anything to do with her - his mothers driving is also highly suspect and I wouldn't trust them not to ruin the few friendships I have with the other mums at DDs school.

He won't be able to get DD until after her bedtime if he has to go home from work and then drive over to me so I think he should either make arrangements to leave work early every ther week or pick her up on Saturday morning - I do feel like a bit of a cow but the court stated that he had to pick her up and he signed the papers agreeing to do so saying that his job would allow it.

What would you do??? (No point talking to hm because he will just lie to me and send them anyway and then the school is put in the situation of having to stop whoever he sends picking her up and then ringing me to go and do it!!)

I can see your point.

If he signed the papers saying he would pick her up, then I think he should, esp if you are not happy about xMIL picking him up, if you say her driving is suspect then you are worried about your dd's safety quite rightly.

I am sure others will give more advice, but I think that is what I would do.

Forgot to add that collecting her on a Saturday seems a better idea, perhaps the time that he is missing could be added on another time.

If he signed papers sayin thats what he'd do and his job would allow it, then he should follow through.

I can understand your point of worrying about what they'd say at School too

I think you are well withtin your rights to make him stick to his original agreement. (Especially so with MIL's driving too!!!)

holy moly, went through this exact same thing about 8-9 yrs ago when ds was nearly 2
his dad my xp wanted him every 2nd weekend, but wanted his mum tp collect him, she ahd a car but was an appalling driver...
I said no, he changed his plans... And collected him on a Saturday

What time would he be able to pick her up on a friday? would it be much later? if not i would still let him pick her up then. If its too late I would specify saturday morning too

My (lovely, fantastic dad, utterly trustworthy!) husband leaves work very early every second Friday to pick my stepdaughter up from school, so no, I don't think you are being unreasonable. If your expgets back so late then maybe Saturday morning is better all round anyway.
After what his mother and your stepmonster have done to you I think you are totally within your rights to keep them away from your dd's school - and serve them right!

Why does he have to drive home before coming to pick her up? Why doesn't he come straight to you (or school) from work? If that doesn't help, then stick to your guns and insist that he collect her on a Saturday if he is not prepared to abide by the agreed arrangements. If he's not happy about this, he will have to apply back to the court to vary the agreement and you will then be able to express your concerns over dd's safety.

Wouldn't let him start pushing the limits of the agreement now tbh. If you concede this, what else is he going to demand?

I don't think you are being unreasonable either. He agreed to the terms,he should have taken that into account when he started his new job. Friday night or Sat morning . Would it matter if she was a bit late going to bed?