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Original poster

My birthday and hubby is nowhere to be seen

18 replies

powderpuff · 04/08/2004 18:03

feeling a bit of a downer..my son is 2.5 and i spend much of my time playing , tending well being his mummy really..today i wanted to have 5 minutes to brush my hair apply some makeup and just look a little better than the normal streaks ..bushy haired mess i am..i asked hubby to just play with our son for 10 mins..what did he do..left him downstairs pulling the safety gate screaming..mummy..why cant he just play with his son so i can get ready.. anyway i mentioned this to him .. hubby said he was busy etc... i ended up packing baby and me off to the park... it's now 6 o clock ..no phone call no card no nothing...

nothing new.. he walked out on us both 2 days before christmas.. i took him back...fool i know... so my birthday is the same as last year.. a non event... i am so fed up.. i gave up work so he could work more hours as baby minding was annoying him ..and i know the current state he would smack our son..[he is rather naughty atm] i wont smack

he even calls him facist etc etc to his face..

i am so fed up..his mates come first..and me last.. and today is a day like every other

i wish i could see a light here as how do i take my son from his father... i am depressed at being called names..fat , hairy etc... i was once so confident..i did put on weight with baby..and i do comfort eat i know.. my family are miles away...

anyway ..sorry =[]

OP posts:
essbee · 04/08/2004 18:14

Message withdrawn

mrsflowerpot · 04/08/2004 18:20

A big happy birthday from me too. Think you should plan a belated birthday treat for yourself and your son (and not tell your husband about it or invite him).

I'm with essbee, how dare he speak to either of you like that. Bet he wouldn't take that from you.

mckenzie · 04/08/2004 18:20

so sorry to hear you're not having a good time at the moment powderpuff. I'm sticking pins in a imaginery voodoo doll at the moment that has your husband's name on it.

Do you have any friends close by who you could go and visit for a quick 'cheer me up' drink and chat?

Frenchgirl · 04/08/2004 18:21

powderpuff I'm sorry your birthday hasn't been special. Your husband sounds rather nasty and has no right to treat you and your son this way, I am appalled. I hope you find some way of celebrating today regardless of him, he needs to understand that his behaviour is unacceptable, you are worth a lot more than this!!!
Happy birthday from me anyway
xxxxx
Frenchie

coppertop · 04/08/2004 18:23

Poor you.

First of all, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

I'm so sorry that your dh is making you feel this way. No one deserves to be treated so appallingly. Even if you have put on weight with the baby (many of us do) that doesn't give anyone the right to call you names.

I know it's all too easy for someone else to say that you'd be better off without him but that's the feeling I get from reading your post. Your dh shouldn't consider spending time with his son to be "Baby-minding". This is his child - not the neighbour's! You say that you don't want to take ds away from his father but do you really think that he would be better off living with a mother with low self-esteem and a father who calls him a fascist, bullies his mother and who smacks him for the slightest thing? My heart goes out to you.

Is there any way that you could possibly move closer to your family (if you left your dh)?

Yorkiegirl · 04/08/2004 18:27

Message withdrawn

Chinchilla · 04/08/2004 20:01

Happy Birthday hugs (()) from me too.

wellsie · 04/08/2004 20:12

Happy Birthday Powderpuff.
Life is too short to be unhappy, you must live your life for you.
I don't want to say too much about your DH but I know if mine was treating me and DS like that he'd be out the door.
Tomorrow go out and treat yourself and your DS, perhaps a picnic in a park with a big birthday cake!!!!

ChicPea · 04/08/2004 20:24

Happy birthday Powder Puff, from all of us Mumsnetters.

sylvev · 04/08/2004 20:44

Happy birthday and make a promise to yourself that your next birthday will be better.
Plan something nice for yourself, no matter how small, you deserve a treat.

sammac · 04/08/2004 20:55

Happy birthday powderpuff. I'm sending you a birthday cuddle to make you feel better ((((()))))

scaltygirl · 04/08/2004 21:47

This reply has been deleted

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twogorgeousboys · 04/08/2004 21:58

Happy birthday powderpuff

Is there any way you can go and stay with family/friends with you ds for a week (at least) just to get a break from what is clearly a very stressful situation. It might give you some proper thinking time......

islandgirl · 04/08/2004 22:29

powderpuff - Happy Birthday, and a big hug. My dh forgot my birthday when I was 9 months pregnant, and then to cap it all my inlaws gave me a roasting tin for my present!. It was a low day, and I'm sorry yours has not been great. Take your ds for coffee and cake tomorrow, and toast yourself!!!

Angeliz · 04/08/2004 22:33

Happy Birthday form here too+++++

Won't go on but agree with others, he is bang out of order!

dottee · 04/08/2004 23:33

Happy Birthday powderpuff

I nearly missed it ... but my best wishes come to you.

Aren't some men dipsticks ... to put it mildly.

I do hope he's come home and made up for it.

Keep us posted!

Aero · 05/08/2004 00:44

Almost missed it too powderpuff, and I know it's been a rubbishy one, but Happy Birthday anyway! Can you plan something special for yourself - maybe a trip to the hairdresser or a beauty treatment - something just for you to give yourself a lift, as a belated present to yourself and perhaps a friend could look after your ds while you do? If not, something nice for you and ds to do - you deserve to feel special! Hugs to you.

harrassedmum · 05/08/2004 23:02

Belated Birthday wishes . Agree with everyone else, may be best to get away, even temporarily, might give him a shock! Hugs to you and ds ((((()))).

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