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Original poster

How should I thank my neighbours?

13 replies

Rowlers · 26/07/2004 17:18

I'm a first time mum (DD is 18 weeks) and have been overwhelmed by the generosity of friends and family. Perhaps most generous of all have been my next-door-neighbours! They have 2 children (7 and 5) and have been passing loads of things to us for when DD is older - books, toys etc. As they are neighbours who we chat to but aren't really close to, I'm not sure what is the most appropriate way to thank them - shoudl we buy something for the parents (wine, chocolates ...) or something for the children? If so, what? Not sure what to do! Any suggestions from mumsnetters would be gratefully received!

OP posts:
bootsmonkey · 26/07/2004 17:24

Something for the parents definately - I would be much happier with a bottle of wine in my hand as thanks than clothes/toys

mckenzie · 26/07/2004 17:26

I should think they are just grateful to be able to clear their house up a bit by giving you all the stuff that they dont need anymore!! Just kidding.

As it's children things that they're giving you then perhaps a small gift for the children would be nicest.

May I advice you not to go overboard though otherwise they might be embarrassed that you thought it necessary to recipricate and wont give you anything else?

mckenzie · 26/07/2004 17:27

my message crossed with bootsmonkey. I just thought as the children are old enough to understand that they have given their old bits to the new baby that it might be nice for the new baby to give a little something back.

But wine is always good!!!! as are chocolates!

Freckle · 26/07/2004 17:29

How about inviting them round for a drink/bbq/dinner? Children too, so it's a family thing. You never know, it might be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Tommy · 26/07/2004 17:31

I agree with Freckle - good neighbours are worth their weight in gold. Invite them round - even just for a cup of tea if you're not up to anything more and have a special thank you cake or something. Sounds great!

gscrym · 26/07/2004 17:36

How about like others have said, invite them round for tea or a barbie and get a little thing from dd to their kids saying thanks from her for all their stuff that they have given her.

Original poster
Rowlers · 26/07/2004 17:41

Really good advice - thanks everyone so far. Can I be cheeky and ask for a bit more advice? Sorry to be clueless but what sort of thing do you buy a 7 year old girl and a 5 year old boy? I know what you mean Mckenzie about not going overboard, but don't want to appear ungrateful. Chocs and wine for mum and dad is easy and inviting them round is a great idea. TA V MUCH so far ...

OP posts:
Janh · 26/07/2004 17:44

Speaking as a parent of older kids who just loves to pass things on, I agree with mckenzie's first post that they will mostly just be glad of a good home for the things to go to and it wouldn't have crossed their minds that you would give anything back.

However if they are very nice people (and it sounds as if they probably are) then inviting them round and getting to know them better is a great idea. They and the children will probably love to become important to your baby!

Original poster
Rowlers · 26/07/2004 17:50

My neighbour has commented each time something has been passed over the fence that she is just glad to get rid of the stuff so you're dead right there! I just feel rude not doing anything at all in return! I like the idea of inviting them round on the one hand. On the other, we've een neighbours for over 5 years and neither of us has invited the other round so far. We get on well, but just as "HI, how are you?" type of thing and I somehow feel it might be a bit weird inviting them round after so long. Do you know what I mean? I suppose I'm trying to take the easier option of buying a gift!

OP posts:
Hulababy · 26/07/2004 17:52

Why not use the idea of the school holidays as the ice breaker. Mum might be getting into the one "how much longer is left" mode by now, so the idea of a quick cuppa and a biscuit might seem like a real treat, which I am sure it would be And ask the children if they'd like to come and entertain your little DD for you for a few minutes.

Thomcat · 26/07/2004 17:55

I'd have them over for a bbq or it that's uncomfortable just a really nice letter saying how much you apopreciate their generosity and a bottle of wine.

Freckle · 26/07/2004 17:57

Has the little girl got long hair - or even short come to that? Bits and bobs for her hair are inexpensive and probably very welcome - not too ostentatious to embarrass the mother into not passing anything else on. Anything to do with cars, trains, Action Man, Spiderman, etc will make a 5 yo boy very happy indeed.

Janh · 26/07/2004 18:31

IKWYM about not having socialised before, but then again you weren't parents before, it gives you a lot in common and loads of things to talk about all of a sudden!

Hula's idea is good, as it is the holidays. Invite mum and kids round for a drink (non-alco!) or an icecream and some biccies - on a nice day you could sit out - that would be less formal than eg a barbecue, also shorter, and you could see how you get on with them? And if you do get on you could have them all round for longer on another day.

Babies do love children, it's amazing sometimes how they spot them in the supermarket or wherever and how differently they respond to kids rather than adults, you might be glad to borrow the girl now and again when your DD needs entertaining!

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