How does housewarming work here?

[PumpkinSpiceEverything]

I'm originally from the US but been living in the UK for nearly 3 years. DH and I just bought our first house and in America, your new neighbours usually bring over baked goods/treats and introduce themselves when you move into a new house. When my MIL's new neighbours moved in though, I noticed that THEY baked cookies and brought them round to all the neighbours to introduce themselves to everyone on the street. Is that just an isolated occurrence or is that the custom here? We move in a few weeks and I don't want to do/expect the wrong thing!

I have no experience of 'housewarming' in that way, I have heard of people having housewarming parties, but have never been to one.
I really don't think you need to do anything.

There's no real tradition here I'm afraid, I wish it was like the US.

Hmm. Interesting. Wonder how I'm supposed to meet people, considering it's nowhere near where we currently live and I'm losing all of my usually play groups/Mum friends. I'll be heavily pregnant when we move and then winter with a newborn means I won't be getting out much. Just wish I had a way of meeting people.

Never had either of those - it would never occur to me to either expect people to bring stuff round or to go round myself tbh.

I'm hugely introverted though!!

I'll be heavily pregnant when we move and then winter with a newborn means I won't be getting out much. Just wish I had a way of meeting people.

Can't you just go to new baby groups with your LO? That's how I made friends.

We always take a bottle of wine to new people. When someone moves in to the villages they usually do drinks one evening for the neighbours - just fizz and canapés nothing glitzy.

Agree with others - neither of those things happens here in my experience. I'd have been very surprised if people had turned up at the door with baked goods when we moved in! And vice versa. People sometimes have housewarming parties but that would be for existing friends and family, not random neighbours from down the road. It might be different in a close knit village type community I guess though, I've always lived in cities.

Baby groups with the newborn will be your best bet.

We've just moved house. Several of our neighbours have come round to introduce themselves. Others have sent cards. I wouldn't expect any baked goods.

It works like this here:

You move into your house. You listen to your new neighbours through the walls. You wave and say 'Alright?' to the last who lives across the street, but never, ever engage her in conversation. If you break this rule she will look at you funny. If a parcel arrives for your neighbours you accept it, and wait patiently for them to collect it. When they do, it's acceptable to smile and say 'there you go!'. When they thank you you can initiate a conversation with a casual 'lived around here long?' or 'good to meet you - we' very only been here a week so it's still boxes everywhere'. If your neighbour is friendly you can say 'we were thinking of inviting a few of our neighbours round to say Hi, you know once we've got ourselves sorted'. Your neighbour will then respond with polite enthusiasm for the hypothetical gathering and you can part with an 'OK see you soon!'

The next part is the most important. The gathering of new neighbours should never actually happen, no matter how long you live there. Thus will lead to a very British sort of polite awkwardness between you for the next 20 or so years. Enjoy!

P. S I wish it was different. I really do.

lady across the street

we've only been here a week.

Just smile and wave at people when you see them. Then wait for something to happen, bad parking, a tree falling over, other neighbours causing a nuisance etc.; that's what starts neighbourly communications. Then they ignore you until the next event.

If any neighbour gets friendly before you've lived next to each other for at least 3 years then be suspicious. They are probably swingers.

It probably depends on the neighbours. When we moved in we were invited over for pizza and prosecco that evening by ours.

I moved across the country when I was expecting ds, I met lots of people through a lovely little toddler group. I would have lost my mind without it.

We moved last year and everyone was really friendly - we got a few cards, a plant and some home grown veggies from various neighbours as well as a few popping round to introduce themselves. I then sent the kids and dh to go round all the neighbours with some cupcakes the kids had made.

I think it does depend on the area/road though - we are in a sleepy village and the vast majority of my neighbours have lived there for 20 years+ If I were you I would probably wait to catch the eye of neighbours then introduce yourself. I might even be brave enough to pop round to direct next door neighbours but probably no further!

Where have you moved to? If its a high turnover part of a big city then you'll probably all ignore each other unless forced to interact through awkward circumstance. If a small village then people might be more nosey friendly

You move into your house. You listen to your new neighbours through the walls. You wave and say 'Alright?' to the last who lives across the street, but never, ever engage her in conversation. If you break this rule she will look at you funny. If a parcel arrives for your neighbours you accept it, and wait patiently for them to collect it. When they do, it's acceptable to smile and say 'there you go!'. When they thank you you can initiate a conversation with a casual 'lived around here long?' or 'good to meet you - we' very only been here a week so it's still boxes everywhere'. If your neighbour is friendly you can say 'we were thinking of inviting a few of our neighbours round to say Hi, you know once we've got ourselves sorted'. Your neighbour will then respond with polite enthusiasm for the hypothetical gathering and you can part with an 'OK see you soon!'

This is exactly it.

When our new neighbour arrived last week DH and I looked out of the window as she was unpacking and made comments like "oooh - that looks like an expensive sofa" and so on and so forth. Then she looked up and saw us so naturally we did the only possible thing and ducked.

Well depending were you live you may have neighbours that actually speak to each other

If you live where I live/ lived previously ( barring one set of lovely neighbours ) you will probably only meet when putting the bin out which will be awkward as hell as you finally have to acknowledge each other's existence !
Honestly we English are a bit strange sometimes ! I'm honestly very chatty though but gave up introducing myself to new neighbours when on the whole they looked at me like I was mad . Clearly awkward , bin putting out at the same time meetings are much more acceptable than having an actual conversation

There's no consistent tradition so I don't think you are in danger of doing the wrong thing. We moved in to this house close to Christmas, so I made cookies, and took them with a Christmas card to each of our neighbours in our cul de sac. Similarly in our last place I made small christmas cakes and took those round. I think our next door neighbour bought us a bottle of wine. If you want to meet people and get to know new neighbours there is no harm in taking something over to say hi. Sadly I wouldn't be sitting home waiting for pots of home baked goodies as it probably ain't gonna happen.

I don't socialise with our neighbours. If you want to meet new friends then I would find some local baby groups - ask your midwife/health visitor or look on internet/facebook for local music/baby gym/baby sensory etc groups. Local churches will most likely have mother and toddler groups.
I would definitely not confine myself to the house for winter with a new baby with no friends

If it's your first baby join an NCT group (or I do know someone on their 2nd who moved to a new area and joined NCT specifically to make new mummy friends)

Here on the edge of a large town l have called and welcomed any new neighbour and introduced myself. But no homebakes lm afraid. Usually just chatted then if in garden.
Go to motger and baby clubs oor if relevaint go to a church which is usually good for meeting families.

Depending on where you are,you might be able to use the Mush app

I normally give new neighbours flowers/bubbly depending on how much money I've got.

I've thrown housewarming parties/meals when I've moved in somewhere but they're really for existing friends and family, although I have invited neighbours when I've seen them.

To meet mum friends definitely attend groups/antenatal classes/nct etc or even volunteer with a group. To meet neighbours you can knock on next door neighbour doors to introduce yourself, but anything beyond that a bit weird. Consider doing some outside jobs like weeding front garden etc at high traffic times of day, friendly neighbours might stop and chat. Also allowed to knock to ask 'what day do the bins go out' etc