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Original poster

Table Manners .. important?

80 replies

Twiglett · 27/03/2007 10:22

Do you teach your children

to use cutlery correctly
to chew with their mouths closed
to sit properly at the table
to not talk until their mouths are empty

if you don't, why not?

OP posts:
corblimeymadam · 13/04/2007 16:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

expatinscotland · 13/04/2007 16:08

YES! Very important!

chocolateface · 13/04/2007 16:08

Yes, and to ask to leave the table... unlike some of their friends.
But we don't do napkins

donnie · 13/04/2007 16:10

manners maketh the man ( and the child!)

cannot abide horrid manners.

Singapore · 13/04/2007 16:11

Yes to all four, but dd2 sometimes kneels.

GeeGee2 · 13/04/2007 16:53

Agree in theory but in practice am definately onto a losing battle. Reality is that I am sometimes so grateful that the children eat something that is healthy and that we eat without any major arguments, I tend to let a lot go. I expect more of my DD6 than my DD4 which causes no end of arguments and strops. Also by the time it gets to tea time, I have run out of energy to enforce anything apart from the really bad things (eating standing on the table).

Any help gratefully received!

McDreamy · 13/04/2007 16:54

yes yes yes and yes

Toots · 13/04/2007 18:44

My parents were actually dreadful role models for table manners despite being ostensibly cultured. My dad used to sit a perversely long way from the table and end losing half his food into his lap giving him greasy stains on the crotch of his trousers for the rest of the day. My mum and MIL share a propensity for embarking on conversation as soon as they put a large forkful of food in their mouth, like they have talkbuds instead of tastebuds. MIL is indeciperable. FIL will often say a beleagured 'what was that my love?' as she splutters something through a gobful of chicken and potato.

My grandpa was just like my dad, only slower. And more shaky. He was partial to a mashed hard boiled egg but very little would actually reach his lips. I confess to finding it fairly entertaining to watch him as a child.

bozza · 13/04/2007 18:49

Yes and on the smug lines I was asked by nursery when DD was about 15 months because she sat at the table so well they thought we must have family meals. I am often irritated when other children are up and about and distracting my DC who are still eating and they are allowed to do this. OTOH I do realise (having sat with her for more meals than anyone else on the planet) that my DD is an interminably slow eater, so do allow a bit of slack before I start judging.

littlelapin · 13/04/2007 18:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BecauseImWorthIt · 13/04/2007 19:57

Yes x 4, and we eat together every night

But I'm still irritated by how much nagging it takes, even though ds1 is 15 and ds2 is 12! It does sometimes spoil what is otherwise a rewarding family occasion.

Jamantha · 14/04/2007 20:15

When I was a child we had to ask permission to leave the dinner table. We had to say "thank you for my dinner, please may I get down?" Only sometimes, if we were in a rush (eg if Top of The Pops was on) we'd rattle it out as we were leaving the table so the words "get down" would be heard by our parents as we went out of sight!

Hilllary · 14/04/2007 20:16

Yes to evrything, table manners are essential.

roisin · 14/04/2007 20:28

Mine are good at 2,3, and 4. They also score very highly on being polite, eating well, not being fussy and particularly on being appreciative of the host/cook - to the extent that people love providing meals for them!

But they are rubbish at using cutlery correctly, and are very messy - table, floor, and clothes usually filthy after most meals ... and they are 7 and 9

yomellamoHelly · 14/04/2007 20:31

Absolutely. When I was in my final year at uni one of the girls in the house we shared had no manners. There were 12 of us and no-one (even her genuine friends) could stand being there while she ate as a consequence so we used to all get up and leave the minute she sat down to eat. Quite a handicap really.

danae · 14/04/2007 20:45

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myermay · 14/04/2007 20:56

Message withdrawn

arwen · 14/04/2007 21:23

Yes x4. My dc are 4 and 3 and always ask to leave the table. I kow some friends think I'm ridiculous but I can't bear it when the last forkful is shovelled in and they are off leaving everyone else eating. we all wait for each other to finish ( within reason) as it's a nice time for conversation.

arwen · 14/04/2007 21:23

I know, that is

funnypeculiar · 14/04/2007 21:28

no (assume they will learn by example - can't say I feel its vitally important)
no (they've never done otherwise that I've noticed)
yes (assuming you mean stay at table until finished - ds asks to get down and get things occassionally - if you mean sit straight/dont figet - no)
yes ... because I can't understand them otherwise

I think broader table manners (eg serving guests first, asking politely if you want more, thanking people for food, learning how to converse whilst eating) are more important...

hunkermunker · 14/04/2007 21:31

yes
yes
yes
yes

Bomper · 14/04/2007 23:00

I made dinner today (spag. bol.) had also done dough balls which were on the table whilst I dished up, everyone dug in whilst I was still in kitchen leaving nowt for me!!! I was pissed off, dh said I was overreacting. Am I the only person left who waits till everyone is at the table before starting?!

PenelopePitstops · 14/04/2007 23:02

yes to all of them

parlty because when you grow up its obvios who has manners and who doesnt and no mater how hard you try you look down on pepople and inevitably they one you

drosophila · 14/04/2007 23:17

Manners are important but to me the things you list are minor compared to social niceties.

I have friends who invite you to dinner and then proceed to have food enough only for themselves. They complain if our kids make a mess and often sit in silence.

One of the best part of good manners is the ability ot make people feel at home. A long lost skill I think.

PenelopePitstops · 14/04/2007 23:22

drosphilla i agree

social niceties and manners are getting lost in society
and i am only 19!

not even a moaning old MIL yet!