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How can I fake my own death before Sunday - my mother is coming to visit!?

9 replies

sweetkitty · 09/03/2007 15:15

Have just phoned my mother as she was threatening to visit this Sunday and said "are you coming to visit?" she said "if you want me to come?" I replied "it's up to you? (ie no I don't want you to come)" and she said "well yes we were planning to"

So now I have to put up with her and Step-dad for the afternoon. She hasn't seen the DDs in over 6 weeks as she is very lazy and will only come to visit if she is ferried in a car as she cannot do trains (she's only 52 and in good health although she dying every time you talk to her).

Both she and SD are very lazy the day will go like this they will come in say wow the DDs have grown, aren't they lovely?, don't they both look like DP, give them tat from the poundshop like cheap Barbies whose hair falls out and legs won't stay on (great for 13 mo DD2), or horrid clothes that really aren't my taste from some second hand shop. Then we will make them tea and SD will bore the pants off DP talking about TVs/PCs/sat nav or the latest gadget he has bought. SD rarely talks to me as I am female and therefore inferior and have no opinion on anything electrical as he is really sexist. My mother will then try to tell me how childrearing was when she did it blah blah blah. Then we will make them lunch and they will scruntise everything the DDs eat/don't eat as they are obsessed with children eating (have the opinion you have to stuff everything you can into them great when they were both BLW'd). We will make them more tea then they will go home before it gets dark. Plus my mother smokes and will moan about having to go outside for a smoke.

They don't want to do anything or go anywhere, they just want to sit on the sofa and watch the DDs play whilst we wait on them. I'm dreading it and so will DP.

I know I have to grin and bear it but argh!!!!!!!!!!

OP posts:
BizzyDint · 09/03/2007 15:18

how awful for you. i lost my mum when i was 9, and would love to be able to complain about her coming to spend time with me, dh and dd.

gscrym · 09/03/2007 15:20

Have lunch ready as soon as they walk in the door and an escape plan for 1 hour later. Boot them out the car at the train station and head home for some wine.

I dread DH's mother coming over. She just talks about all her health problems.

Swizzler · 09/03/2007 15:20

What about a forced walk? Works with my parents (love seeing them but they are very hard work). Perhaps you could say that your DDs need to get out and get some sun (if the weather's good)?

gscrym · 09/03/2007 15:21

I'm sorry you lost your mum Bizzydint, I had typed my post before I saw yours.

sweetkitty · 09/03/2007 15:22

that's fair enough and I can see you point, I cannot imagine losing your mother at such a young age

it must seem like I'm having a good old moan but this woman shouldn't really have the title mother with some of the things she did to be whilst I was growing up and I had to have a lot of counselling to try and come to terms with it all

but she is my DDs grandmother and I cannot deny her access to them so I have to put up with her

OP posts:
fryalot · 09/03/2007 15:24

We all have to do things we don't want to sometimes.

Think "It's only one day.... it's only two more hours....it's only twenty more minutes" They will be long minutes, but hey, in the grand scheme of things, soon over.

gscrym · 09/03/2007 15:25

Don't deny access, just don't go to any effort to provide it if you feel she doesn't warrant it.

LucyJones · 09/03/2007 15:26

I too am sorry for your loss BizzyDint (fab name by the way) but I think it's ok for Sweetkitty to moan about her mother on here.

sweetkitty · 09/03/2007 15:31

I don't go out of my way to visit her though as it means trains with a double buggy and it's a real hassle (much easier for a single adult).

I really hate the way she tries to make out to SD that she was a fantastic mother and that my Dad beat her up all the time and her life was so hard when I want to scream you were a drunk crap mother and my Dad only defended himself. I have issues with my Dad as well I'm not all one sided in case you were wondering. She will critise me constantly to my face yet will tell everyone else how well I've done as if it's a reflection of her parenting skills.

Last year when she phoned I told her she wouldn't be able to pick the DDs out of a line of 10 babies as she had seen then 3 times in 6 months. If they were DS's of course that would be different as she is the same as SD females are inferior.

Right I could rant all day so I'm going to stop.

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