EMPLOYERS OF NANNIES!...

[ScottishThistle]

Hi!

After a discussion with an Nanny acquaintance of mine, I'd like to know if you would be upset if your Nanny told you of your child's first time crawling/ first word/ first steps?

I've always felt that it's unfair to do so as these firsts mean so much to Parents.

My friend said she always informs of firsts!

How do you feel about it?

it may upset me, but sometimes saying something aloud, like a statement which lets me feel as if i am also a part of this 'first' is enough to make me feel ok with everything. and although i may wish i could be there for all the firsts, i am also dedicated to my work and have chosen a nanny as the best way to be able to raise 2 kids 20 months apart, and have a fulfilling career,
in the long run, i will be the one who was there for it all, the firsts, the seconds, the whatevers. so why should i let myself feel bad now.

i also try to keep in mind that i have a great nanny and if my dds are making any advances in her presence, that is great news.

i wouldnt expect her to think of me and not mention the firsts to me. instead of expecting her to do that, i just put it straight, the way i want it.

what do you think?

I'm not a Parent but I think it would upset me...You've obviously found a way to deal with it which is good...However, I won't have a Nanny because I am one!

that is really funny. i have always thought that nannies couldn't possibly ever have a nanny for their child. it doesnt make sense logically.

i think when you have a child your perspective will change. my nanny doesn't have her own children and i think thats why she would not be sensitive to the case of not mentioning firsts to me.

my dh grew up with a nanny his whole life and he is the most well rounded, sane, happy and straightforward person i know.

I don't have children either but I think sensitivity is a very important quality to have if you choose to be a Nanny!

yes but i dont think a nanny without her own children will be sensitive to such things as a mothers need to be there for the firsts.

my nanny just fills me in on all the details as they were, she knows that is what is important to me. she wouldnt omit the 'first' becuase she foresaw i may get upset. she is exited just as i am.

i think its something mothers who choose nannies need to take into consideration.

i didn't realize that until i started leaving my dd2 for full days, and feel ok with it i use the device i mentioned. it really works for me.

Maybe I'm just a very different Nanny then!

< polishes perfectly sensitive halo >

if you are, then lucky whoever is hiring you. you might as well just keep a 'first' to yourself if you can. i'm sure any child's mom will be grateful