Getting stuck in lifts & other phobias

[expatkat]

I got stuck in a lift with 20-month-old dd today. It was hot, dd hadn't had lunch (or her nap), & I'd run out of snacks long before. The telephonist on the other end of the emergency phone said it would be 30 mins before an engineer could get there. I explained about the toddler, and added that I get panic attacks. She repeated, "Sorry, 30 mins." I asked if there was a quicker way, like calling the fire brigade, but she refused. Then I noticed my mobile worked. So I called dh, who called a shop in the building, and the shop manager rang the fire brigade. They arrived quickly and got me out in no time. But all told we were in there for about 20 mins.

The funny thing is that getting stuck in a lift is something I always worry about. Whenever I get into a liftany liftI'm waiting for it to get stuck. I've gotten stuck about 3 other times--but in those cases the lift resolved its own problem and started moving a few minutes after getting stuck.

Do you think that because I go through the world expecting to get stuck in lifts, it happens to me? Or does everyone get stuck in lifts from time to time? Same with the underground. I'm terribly afraid of the train getting stuck between stations, and it seems always to happen when I'm on it. Not REALLY stuck as in breaking down, but stuck for 5 or 10 mins. Similarly, I was traveling from NYC to Boston by highspeed train 2 wks ago, and the train broke down & had to be evacuated. I was told this had only happened once before in that train's history. Does this kind of thing happen to everyone, or do I "bring it on" in some magical way?

Everyone says "avoidance" is the worst thing for phobias, but quite frankly I'd rather climb the stairs or take the bus.

My Mum is scared of getting stuck in lifts and has been stuck in one twice, once there was no answer when she pressed the alarm button. I have no fear of it and have never been stuck even though I use them all the time, although once the lift in my apartment building refused to go higher than the 4th floor and kept returning me to the lobby.

I think some of it is that you notice more when something that you're scared of happens, for instance I don't even bother to look up from my book when we stop between stations on the tube so I have no idea how often it happens to me.

The stairs are much better for you anyway .

Then there's my friend in Brooklyn, who was just emerging from the World Train Center subway station when he was told to RUN as the buildings started to collapse on 9/11. And then, a couple of years later, he was stuck on the subway for over an hour during that massive black-out that struck the East Coast. He doesn't have phobias, though. Just crap luck.

Interesting, Bran. I wondered that about the tube. Dh says it happens all the time, not just when I'm on it.

Poor you, Expatkat, that sounds horrible - and outrageous that the telephonist wouldn't call the fire brigade! Good thinking on behalf of you and your DH.
I think we all get a bit stuck from time to time - and you notice it because it is your worst nightmare!

Forgot to say that the time my Mum was stuck with no answer from the alarm bell was before mobile phones, but she got out by pushing a credit card in between the doors which triggered the opening mechanism. I think that would be very unsafe if the lift were stuck between floors though, she knew she hadn't left the ground floor.

expatkat - sounds like your friend has good not crap luck if he's still here to tell the tale!

I'm just like you expatkat. I find it almost impossible to use a strange lift (ie I could use the one at work, but only during office hours, when I knew people were about to hear me etc). Unfamiliar ones are very difficult to me, so I tell myself the stairs are healthier. As for the tube, I started getting mild panic attacks so now I never use it. It terrifies me. I stick to my car or buses. I live in a part of London that doesn't have a tube and people think it's a disadvantage - not to me it isn't!

I will always remember by mobile from now on though!

i dont like lifts, but as most of the time i have dd2 with me and she is a buggy i have tro use them. i try to avoid the glass lifts as i hate these more than normal lifts, and do count whilst in them. if theres a gap between the lift stopping and the doors opening then i can feel myself start to panic. so far so good, never been stuck in a lift.

i just dont use lifts-am bloody terrified tbh! just get ds out of the pushchair and he walks up stairs and i carry the pushchair! i have been talked into going in lifts in the past and have actually collapsed on the floor in panic!!
i can use completely glass lifts though.

when ds and i have been to hulababys he has had to walk up all the stairs-is 14 sort of 1/2 flights!

Knew you'd be here maisystar!!!

Seriously though, must be really difficult for you all.

Hulababy and other who AREN'T afraid of getting stuck in a lift:

I'm curious to know what your emotions would be if you got stuck in a lift. Annoyance? Boredom? Relief at having some time to yourself? A tiny bit of anxiety? I'm always interested to know the "normal" response to such a situation because I recognize that my own responses are exaggerated. I guess I'd like to know how I'd feel if ever I were "cured."

Aloha, I'm going to be a lot more careful about making sure my mobile is charged in the future. I'm usually v. careless & half the time my battery's gone dead. I confess I'm not a big fan of driving either so I sometimes feel a little disempowered when it comes to transport. I either bus it or hoof it, really. Do you ever feel disappointed in yourself that you can't ride the tube? I definitely do. I've tried therapy, and I've gotten a bit better, but I still tend to avoid it if I can.

And bran: I'll remember that credit card trick! Your poor mum; I really feel for her.

expatkat, I live at the top of a tall towerblock so I have to take the lift. To be honest, when we moved in I was in a bit of a cold sweat about the thought of being reliant on a lift as I used to suffer very badly from claustrophobia. But the longer we've lived here the less bothered I am. And now I'm so used to going up so many floors at home all other lifts seems like small fry in comparison! Also used to be scared of heights but now not at all.

I still have lots of other phobias of course ...

I think that 'magical thinking' thing that if you're afraid of something it's bound to happen can work both ways. I mean I tend to think that if I've thought of something it won't happen and it's only the things I never expect to happen that will happen. If that makes sense? So I spend my time obsessively going over all the possibilities of a situation going wrong thinking that that way I'll be neutralising the possibilities of it going wrong.

Phew ...

So now, by my own logic, if I no longer worry that the lift will break down that means it probably will. So I better start worrying again.

I have no fear of being stuck in a lift, and consequently (perhaps) never have. But if I were to be stuck in a lift I hope that it's with someone interesting or that I have a good book to read with me. I always carry a flashlight with me, so would't be worried about the dark.

However, being from california and having been in a very large earthquake, I am paranoid about being in a car stopped under bridges, motorways etc.

Once DH didn't want to get into a lift after a party at someones flat, admittedly it was a really juddery lift that behaved as though it was on it's last legs when came up in it. I didn't fancy the walk down the stairs (only 6 flights, but I was quite drunk) so I said the first thing that came into my head, that we'd never had sex in a lift before and there'd be plenty of time to do it if we got stuck. I had to guard the emergency stop button with my hand the whole way down.

I'm actually quite fond of lifts now that we live on the 5th floor, they're a good place to sneek a kiss, no one can see and there's nothing else to do. Also if DH has his hands full of shopping bags I can cop a feel if I want.

Probably more information than you wanted, but I'm full of wine and sleepy.

Actually, I do have a strange phobia, I have to hold my breath when I pass vents, the kind that pump out warm air from air-conditioning systems. I can't put my finger on exactly when it started because I wasn't aware that I did it until someone pointed it out - definitely connected to my Dad having had legionnaires.

The disease Legionnaires, or is that just my dirty mind?

That's very resourceful to carry a torch SofiaAmes, is that because of past experience or because you live in the countryside? It's something that I would never even consider, I'm such a city girl, but I probably should as you can get really compact ones. But then again, I expect it would sit in my bag for years and then when I needed it the batteries would be dead.

some people do belive if youthik about something hard enough then it will happen but im afraid i cant agree with them its just a coincidence that some thing happen when you thik about it to much not magical in anyway
like you i freak every time i have to go into a lift and it has broken down a few times on me and i have totaly freaked
in a way i can understand why people would say avoidence is the worst thing but my worst is high up and if i can avoid it i do it for saftey reason as i useualy pass out

In response to earlier question - if I got stuck in the lift I would probably end up panicing if for any great length of time, exspecially if i had DD with me - I would be anxious for her too. I'd also be fed up, cross, annoyed, etc. I did get stuck in Gap's lift on Monday but fortunately only for about 5 minutes - it just started working again after refusing to let me get out on 1st floor. I was just annoyed in that shrt space of time, but admit I was starting to get anxious.

I live on 5th floor of my aprtment block - as Maisystar nows it is about 134 steps from ground floor, and 141 from basement car park. Carrying DD, pushchair and bags is a nightmare - had to do it for 9 weeks at start of year as lift was being replaced. Was horrid, especially with my funny heart. But I guess if I was scared/had phobia of lifts I wouldn't lift there would I?

lifts must be a common phobia I am scared of them too

Thx, hulababy. I asked the same question of a sane friend I saw in the park today, and she said she'd just be annoyed, and that her annoyance was spur her on to action of some sort. She'd start demanding the fire brigade were called, etc etc.

And of course: now I remember about all your stairs from the heart thread! Which reminds me that I was a little worried about my heart in the lift because it was hot, I hadn't eaten that day (very bad judgement!) and was anxious too--the whole recipe for an episode of superventricular tachycardia. (I was actually in the lift in order to go and get some food.) Luckily I had my meds with me; that's one thing I never leave the house without.

bran, I'm a total city girl too. My "torch" is actually an really cool looking red led light designed to go on a key chain (it's thinner than a pencil and a about 2.5 inches long). I bought it because I thought it looked cool, not because I actually thought it would be practical. But it's turned out to be really useful every once in a while. And it's great to pull out as a plaything when the kids are bored. Because it's an led light the batteries last forever.

I don't have a serious lift phobia, but suspect I have a mild one - since taking a pushchair about and using lots of lifts, I am always astounded that people use the lift instead of escalators, or to go up one flight of stairs. Or does everyone think that? My gran had a lift phobia and also a down escalator phobia (she injured her ankle on a down escalator), but was absolutely fine on up escalators... a somewhat inconvenient combination of phobias really..