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Attention seeking - now look 'ere.

49 replies

hunkermunker · 29/01/2007 01:44

Pay attention.

OP posts:
TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 02:45

oh god, i wasn't aware of that. how awful...

can't think of anything to say except, you know, that's a terrible, terrible thing. what a shame for you all.

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 02:49

I know aitch and sorry for lumping such shitty news on you at this unholy hr but ho hum life trundles on, have a sister who has only txt once since it happened, two supposedly best friends that were more concerned that I couldn't arrange a babysitter for a meal one of them had arranged, wtf so am feeling a bit raw to say the least. Sorry won't go on, you need this like a hole in the head at this hour but sorry for being grouchy and oversensitive.

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 02:52

go on as much as you like. it sounds shitty beyond belief. i know they say that you find out who your friends are when the chips are down, but nobody really tells you what to do if you find out they're full of crap, do they?

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 02:57

I've never felt as alone as I do right now, I'm trying to be strong for my dd but apart from my therapist, yes I'm in therapy..quelle surprise........I'm also a trainee therapist.........tho having huge doubts re that now. I'm seriously fucked off with life at the mo!

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 03:04

Anyhoo sorry for going on but thanks for listening, nite or morning rather.

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 03:06

Anyhoo sorry for going on but thanks for listening, nite or morning rather.

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 03:07

therapy's good, people need support and we don't live in the same communities as we used to. (although a big part of me thinks 'thank god' about that). i suppose that's why places like this flourish.
i've never had someone i know commit suicide... i can't imagine being so desperate. it must be awful. and as for the people left behind, i can't imagine what you're going through... terrible.
i take it that because you weren't together people don't think you cared, when obviously you do? or is that wrong?

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 03:07

x-posted.

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 03:22

Oh aitch, cared does not even come close, you know I didn't have a great relationship with my own dad growing up, he used to knock seven bells out of me tbh but he is now elderly and has alzheimer's but at least through therapy I've been able to work through a lot of my issues therapy and hae been in a position in the last few years to rebuild albeit a forgiving relationship from my end with him but with my dd who is now 20, her father only turned up last year, delivering a feckin skip of all things, anyway roll on a month or two and we all met up and they then went out a few times but then he had health issues with his legs, laid off work, stopped contact with dd for a bit, gets in touch, they went out one last time, about November, I think, then dd feels a bit distant, he sent his brother into dd's shop, whom dd hadn't met before, his brother telling dd that he was very down because dd was not in touch, dd was fuming but did send him a txt saying, look let's meet up in the new year, my heads been a bit all over the place etc, her dad does not contact at all over xmas, then sends a txt in and around 2nd maybe 3rd of Jan saying sorry for being a lousy father, takes his life on Fri 12th, since find out he begged another brother to come tell dd he loves her Sunday prior to his suicide, oh God sorry aitch I'm rambling madly now but I'm so scared for dd, despite having no contact with her dad she is very like him, keeps a lot in etc, she had a thank God not major but nonetheless brief history of self harm and this evening when she came homw she had a huge blister type bur on her fingers, ok think I should stop now because it's unfair to be offloading this crap on you.

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 03:29

stop panicking. i'm fine. i'm in my house and everyone's dandy. you're the one whose not fine.

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 03:31

i can understand that you are worried about her... that's a shitload to take on board. what a (scuse me) git he is for landing all that on her.

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 03:31

how is she doing? is she talking to you about it all?

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 03:32

i'm writing short posts cos i don't want you to think i'm forgetting about you, btw.

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 03:33

He's gone and well that's horrible tragic blah blah etc but it's my dd I'm worried about, Jesus if the Fu*ker wasn't already gone I'd be tempted to do him........sorry lame attempt at humour. On a good note I'm expecting an info pack from national suicide support people in Ireland in the next day or two so hopefully can get dd some more support fast.

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 03:35

poor girl.

my dh's dad did a bunk when he was a wee boy. he met up with him a few years ago and the dad did all the 'oooh, delighted to have made cntact, your mother's a bitch, no i never hit her who told you that etc'. what was good was that dh's interest fizzled out in his dad, iykwim? but if his dad had suddenly killed himself in the middle of it all i think dh would have been heartbroken.

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 03:41

Aw listen I can totally relate to the denial etc, when we all met up that first night last year, he warbled on in this lovely bubble of denial, thought you had moved abroad bolleaux, yeah right, we lived in the same town, erm we were kids but as my daughter bless her pointedly told him, "Yes but mum didn't piss off" You know what really frustrates me though, he had since married, was with me on rebound from girl he eventually married but the man has also left behind a widow and a ds 12 and dd 8. Christ I'm trying not to judge but it's hard.

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 03:50

Oh crap, have just realised I'm sounding off on an "Attention seeking - now look 'ere" tread, have managed to hi jack hunkers thread and feel more than to be warbling on said title thread.........am heading to bed but thanks aitch for listening and turning from lighthearted to counsellor in the space of a post.

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 03:59

don't be daft. i can see why you're worried. it's a massive betrayal from someone who had only just returned to her. he must've been in a bad way, though. sleep well, you can only be there for your daughter, i'm sure she knows that you are.

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 04:00

Thanks aitch, thanks so much for listening, nite x

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 04:04

night night, sweetheart. i'm nearly finished my work too so will be off shortly. i hope you manage to clear your mind to sleep... think about white sheets billowing on a line. that's what i do sometimes.

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 04:07

Aw your too kind and pet I've no problem with billowing clouds, your secrets safe or maybe not.......forget others can see this at times.......a bit like cbb eh? nite nite

Calmdown · 29/01/2007 04:08

sheets even

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 04:52

hah! i was up later than you! and DD will rise in, what, two and a half hours..? what joy. night night, finally.

TheHunkerWhisperer · 29/01/2007 04:52

and sheets are better than clouds because they make a noise, obviously...

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