midlife crisis anyone?????????????

[happycat]

I think that my dh is going through a midlife crisis and I don't know what to do.
Questions

1. how long does it last
2. what are the symptoms 3.what can I do to help then? He is driving me nuts at the moment he is never happy with anything, seems restless and I really think he dosen't feel like being a family man at the moment.I feel like a mother with a bloody stroppy tenage Kevin on my hands.Some male input would also be great

Chandra that sounds like a good idea I will get a bottle of wine out tonight and see if I can talk to him

thanks for all your post.Has anyone elses husband gone through this ? Is it just the men that go through it ?

Happycat - think I am in the same position as you... DH turned 40 last year and is definitely having a mid-life crisis... about his career, his health, his 'role' (father/ husband/ individual)
One of the things which seemed to help him was to take up some new interests (for him it was our local Round Table - a charity fund-raising and social club) which helped him get out and meet other blokes who are at the same lifestage!

I know what you mean about we women also feeling it, but somehow just getting on and coping!

Where are you - feels like we should be having a Mumsnet Midlife crisis Girls night Out!!

omg having read this mine is having one too and I thought he was just being grumpy

I live in kent where are you?

Surrey - so not so far!

oh god mine has been having one since I met him when he was 23. I believe it started when he was about 10

I don't want to be a killjoy, as people have said some very amusing things on this thread, but you should look out for signs of depression in someone who is going through a period of questioning. I'm 42 and had my mid-life crisis a few months ago, basically over what job I want to do from now on. I went to a career counsellor, who gave me some pyschometric tests, and she told me that she thought I was close to clinical depression. I was shocked, as I knew I had been finding things hard, but hadn't realised how sad I was feeling until a stranger spotted it. I saw my GP, took anti-depressants for a couple of months, made some career decisions and am a lot better now.

My husband went through a similar thing and I encouraged him to start going out mid week it has really helped. Men are uselss at talking about things, the weekly pub trip gives them a chance to talk if they want to. I think he was just stuck in a rut, all the other suggestions about hobbies (great one about the skateboard Tom - a friend of mine nearing 40 has taken up rollerblading and loves it) are really good, sometimes we need to remind ourselves that we are still alive, and not buried under domesticity - skate board, pubs, and a live music event, that's my tonic for him. There is nothing like live music to make you feel good! Good luck

well dh has gone out tonight with his mates and I know he really enjoys this so I will see if it will make a difference.There was a chance that he might have had to cancel tonight and he got really down about it so it will do him some good.

well - I've just spent ALL DAY shopping at Bluewater - bliss! - but am having my own 'fat, frunpy, and not yet forty mid-life crisis..... why is it that size 12's just aren't as big as they used to be

m02 I live really close to bluewater so next time you do a bit of retail therapy e mail me and I will come too