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Original poster

Hmm....I think we'll have nosey neighbours

23 replies

Nutcracker · 30/05/2004 21:24

I know this isn't a big prob but it is already starting to get on my nerves and we haven't even moved in yet.

We have been around to look at the house a few times now (only outside,backgarden e.t.c) and everytime we've been round there, someone from next door has come straight out of their house and started yapping away and asking all sorts of questions.
Today we drove around there on the way back from shopping and we didn't evenm get out of the car, but this bloke on next doors drive said to Dp "you looking at that empty house mate"
So Dp says "I think you mean my house"
This bloke then starts telling us this that and the other about the old neighbours, and asking us where we live now e.t.c.
This family aren't soooo bad but not really the type of people i want to associate with at all really.
I don't want us to get off on the wrong foot, but at the same time i don't want them in my face everytime i step into the back garden. I have waited along time for this garden, i want to get some use out of it without being pestered.

I know i seem really snobby, and i probably am being, but we are a quiet family who keep ourselvers to ourselves and thats how i like it.

How can i discourage them without offending them ??

OP posts:
Janh · 30/05/2004 21:29

Is this the same family with the kids that your friend the other side doesn't want in her garden????

Original poster
Nutcracker · 30/05/2004 21:31

Yep, you have a good memory

OP posts:
misdee · 30/05/2004 21:50

you're a snob

nah, erm no idea, how about higher fences all the way round?

hercules · 30/05/2004 21:51

Plant those trees/hedges that grow really tall and block em out

Original poster
Nutcracker · 30/05/2004 21:54

No I think I must be a snob

There is already a fence on that side, but there kids have been known to climb over them.
Also there 12 yr old tends to knock the door and ask if he can come in and wait for his mom/dad when they are out.

OP posts:
hercules · 30/05/2004 21:55

Can you suddenly develop a contagious disease that is very unpleasant?

hercules · 30/05/2004 21:56

Seriously, I would start as you mean to continue- be polite but keep the chat small and short.

misdee · 30/05/2004 21:56

tell him he can wait on the step/in the front garden for them. or shove him over the fence into his garden.

Original poster
Nutcracker · 30/05/2004 21:59

LoL you two.

I am so crap at pretending to be nice though.
Think is i tend to go for the nearly ignoring them thing, so that they don't speak to us at all, but then that would be rude, and i don't want to be rude.

OP posts:
GeorginaA · 30/05/2004 22:06

Look on the bright side - it's likely to be a low crime neighbourhood as a result!!

Sorry, that sounds terribly flippant, but in my experience a nosey neighbour can sometimes be a bonus in certain circumstances...

Janh · 30/05/2004 22:07

Agree with hercules - get some leylandii planted their side! (30' before you can blink!)

Original poster
Nutcracker · 30/05/2004 22:09

Thats true GA. Apparently he has got rid of kids hanging around houses before now.

Hopefully the novelty will wear off once we've been there a bit.

OP posts:
Original poster
Nutcracker · 30/05/2004 22:10

Hmm did i mention i can't garden to save my life ??? Luckily i know someone who can

OP posts:
jodee · 30/05/2004 22:23

Try limiting your answers to nothing more than 'yes', 'no', don't know', they will soon think you are really boring and not worth talking to (we know better of course!). And agree about letting kid wait on the step, once they get a foot in the door there's no stopping them.

Original poster
Nutcracker · 30/05/2004 22:24

O.k i will be strong and stand my ground.
If they insist on annoying me, i'll set you lot on them

OP posts:
charliecat · 31/05/2004 10:12

Nutty, dont know how to keep the parents at bay but i would definetly make sure you make it clear from the start your garden is out of bounds to anyone unless they are invited in. I live in a row of 10 houses and the back gardens are all joined and only have little fences in between. Everyone else lets the kids from all the houses run riot from garden to garden and they cant have flowers or toys because the kids tread on the flowers and the toys disapeer up and down the garden and its just too much hassle to retrieve them day in day out.
I made it clear from day one I wasnt going to stand for it as I wanted to have a border with Pansys etc in and after a few polite reminders and one or two, will you feck off this isnt a playground its my garden, the kids dont bother anymore, but we do end up with an audience when we have a paddling pool out.
They all stand there 8-10 of them peering over the fence saying Penny can we come in...its a bit sad but a paddling pools only a couple of quid from the pound shop, theres not room for 14 kids in mine and I couldnt have 1 or 2 over and not the rest...and anyway, when I have invited a couple over when theres not a big crowd, they always break something or lob the sand everywhere and its not worth the hassle. Hope you enjoy your new house and garden btw...Well done!

magnum · 31/05/2004 10:17

I had the same problem with my house. Every time I went into the garden the lady from next door would be out like a shot. She even used to call me when I was in the house and wave at me through the kitchen window. We had to invest in a high fence which was quite expensive as the gardens quite big but solved the problem. You're right you can't relax in your own garden with neighbours like that. They have now moved and we've got a new family in who are totally renovating the house so its noise we have to contend with now Anyway, good luck

suzywong · 31/05/2004 10:22

get your Dp to do some naked sunbathing
Just a couple of sessions should do the trick.
No offence to DP

Charliecat is very wise. One of my mum and dad's houses backed on to an estate and it was while before the garden fence was built up, it was a new build. Anyway the neighbours would line up in the garden opposite and stare through the windows. I remember my dad and the end of his tether flinging the dining room window open and displaying his plate and telling them exactly what he was eating for lunch.
They weren't that curios after that.

Conversely the neighbours round here, some of them, blank my DH at 10 paces and that's after living here for over 9 years.

Freckle · 31/05/2004 10:33

Think up all sorts of excuses (and write them down so you don't forget and can keep refreshing your memory) and then, each time neighbour collars you going into the house, you can say "Ooops, sorry, X needs feeding" or "Oooh, I think that's my phone, must dash". In the back garden, try "Bother, I've left something on the stove" (this can be used umpteen times until the leyandii get high enough). She'll probably think you're totally scatty and disorganised, but we'll know better

Soulfly · 31/05/2004 11:03

I can't say we have really nosey neighbours. But abit like charliecat, all the kids, geesshhh. When you walk out your front door, they are watching you, like your some kind of alien species. lol. I think its because i don't let my two kids play out on there own. So its probably like wow!!.
And they get up the side of my house and walk along a wall which is at least 6foot and sit on my wall at the back and can see right into my kitchen, its most annoying.
But its not that friendly here.

noddy5 · 31/05/2004 11:36

It is best to just be polite but not engage in chat with them If you are like this from day one they'll get the message.A big tall fence helps!I would hate that too and my dp doesn't like too much involvement with neighbours so if you both agree it should be ok

Original poster
Nutcracker · 31/05/2004 22:53

Thanks guys, Suzy suggestion should work i think , it'll have them moving out nevermind stop them being nosey.

Seriously though, i've spoken to my friend (she lives the otherside of them) and she reckons that once we've been there a while they wil leave us alone. She is a bit of a soft touch so lets some of the kids in her garden. I won't as i really don't want them there at all.

Will also make a list of excuses (good idea Freckle)

CharlieCat - You sound like you've got it sussed
I will just have to be firm but friendly

OP posts:
Chandra · 31/05/2004 23:09

I agree, answering questions with yes, no or maybe are enough not to go into further conversation, the less information you give about yourself the shorter the round of questions.

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