but I can't as it was only earlier this morning where we were chatting and I made it clear to him (and I know he understood and was listening) that the decision as to whether, once we're seperated, we try and get our relationship back on track - ie try and rebuild from 'friends' to 'lovers' - was entirely up to him. I told him that I didn't see this as 'final' and he said he would have to leave it a while - to let some of the dust settle - before making any choices - which is absolutely fine by me - I don't want to force him into anything.
Anyhow - I digress - the simple thing of the above is we're just friends atm. He got a phonecall about 1hr ago from a cousin in Zimbabwe to say that his brother (my BIL) had beaten up his (new - only got married in December) wife - quite badly - not sure how bad but certainly not just a few bruises from what I can make out. Apparently he's beaten her before - but this is the worst.
Even if we were still 'normal' husband and wife all I would be able to do for DH in this situation is be there to support him - it's very much a cultural, and very complicated family, issue as to what happens now and something I would stay out of regardless of DH and I.
But he's so obviously really concerned about it and I just want to give him a hug just to say "I care and I'm here" - but it just doesn't feel right.
Sorry - didn't know where to put this, and I guess it's just a load of waffle - but needed it off my chest.