JileF - I am very sorry you were made to feel like a leper - that's just plain unprofessional as we all have a right to make our own decisions.
My experience of a "baby friendly" hospital" wasn't like that at all! While they might "encourage" certain things, they didn't impose anything!
Things like "skin to skin" contact after birth is up to the mum - if you wanted the baby to be cleaned and/or swaddled before being given to you, then that's what they would have done. I had specifically requested maximum skin contact immediately after birth, but as he was forceps, by the time they put him on me, from memory (a bit fuzzy), he was already half wrapped!
At the ante natal classes, while b/f was promoted, no-one was made to feel a leper if they were choosing not to b/f. I don't even recall them asking us! Indeed, their research had shown that to a large extent, decisions are made at a much earlier stage, even before pregnancy and much of their effort goes into outreach and talking to school kids.
They ran b/f worskhops for those that WERE interested in b/f - but again, no compulsion whatsoever to attend.
Also, after the birth, it was all very matter of fact back on the ward. The midwife would ask how you were intending to feed, and if the answer was formula, then they would simply ask if you had a preferred brand. In terms of time taken to make up the formula, from observation, it was no longer than for ready made, as it could be made up "warm" while the ready made would have needed to be heated up. The important thing was, it wasn't there as "temptation" to those people who WERE trying to give b/f a go (and it IS hard in the first few days!). I know from talking to mums who gave birth at the other Glasgow hospitals that the cupboard full rows of ready made formula was a very real temptation.
"Rooming in" is a more difficult one - but I believe is a practice that most hospitals, "baby friendly" or not, now follow. I do know that midwives/auxilliairies on my ward were always more than happy to look after a baby for a wee while if the Mum wanted a rest. Most(!) of them are in the profession because they love babies!