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Original poster

Visiting a GP about "mind issues"

45 replies

Thaigal · 29/12/2006 23:38

I have long suspected that all is not right "upstairs" with me, I'm not stupid or anything but I know I act oddly sometimes, to me it's just funny, others find it wierd and childish and I can see why but I still find it funny. I've read up on it and some of my behaviour when I look back at it seems to indicate bi-polar?

I worry over very silly things, I become all wound up and stressed about simple things like getting a different bus for the first time or going somewhere where I don't know the route 100%. I tend to avoid social situations as best as I can, I only have 1 friend and I often make excuses not to see her.

I constantly feel annoyed and angry, often about petty things that happened years ago such as me getting the blame for breaking something as a child when it wasn't me, I feel angry that I was picked on at school and I blame my mum for not dressing me in the right clothes, now I have an obsession with my own kids clothes that they always have to be "the best", I'm not a snob but I worry that if I dont buy their clothes from certain places they will be bullied and end up as "losers" when they're adults (reading it back it sounds ridiculous I know).

I don't sleep very well, when I do go to bed (usually around 1am) I daydream myself to sleep re-living a stupid dream that I had as a teenager...

I also have an obsession with violence, domestic violence inparticular, I have no idea why and I know how awful that is, especially if anyone reads this that has suffered (I am sorry ) I KNOW this is not normal.

So, I thought it was about time I got myself sorted, or at least looked into. I have an idea that this could all be down to abuse I suffered as a child but I don't know, its the only thing I can think of that has maybe made me go a bit loopy.

So, what exactly do you say to a doctor to the effect of "please can I see a shrink? I'm going mad... thanks "

Has anyone done this? a new doctor has started at the surgery, a female who is a very "lovey grandma" type (but younger!) and I would feel easier talking to her than the other male doctors.

Please help, also if you have any idea of the other symptoms I'd love to hear it
Thanks

OP posts:
lemonice · 29/12/2006 23:41

are you asking about your other symptoms [puzzled emoticon]

bipolar is mood disorder

Original poster
Thaigal · 29/12/2006 23:51

I'm asking about the symptoms plus asking for advice from anyone who has gone to their doctor with stuff like this. I'm not good when it comes to talking to people so telling a doctor that I think I'm going mad is not going to be easy!

OP posts:
lemonice · 29/12/2006 23:52

depends what you consider mad really

does it matter a lot to you or is it just thagai's persinality?

colditz · 29/12/2006 23:53

I do almost exactly as you are describing, except avoiding company - I almost constantly seek it. I do suffer depression at times.

Go and see her. Whatever it is, it's worrying you, and nobody should have to worry.

Original poster
Thaigal · 29/12/2006 23:56

Lemonice, I don't know if you are being sarky or if I'm just taking your posts the wrong way but if you don't think I'm being serious why bother replying?

Thanks Colditz

OP posts:
Original poster
Thaigal · 29/12/2006 23:56

Lemonice, I don't know if you are being sarky or if I'm just taking your posts the wrong way but if you don't think I'm being serious why bother replying?

Thanks Colditz

OP posts:
twinsetandpearls · 29/12/2006 23:58

I suffer from "bi polar" although I donlt like giving it a label and just see it as part of my personlity, I ahve some of your traits for example getting stressed about new situations and I do go through phases of being very angry atanyone and anything but myslef, everyone else is to blame but this is accompanied by a complete self loathing that leads to self harm.

I also insist that dd looks immaculate - but again I think that is just the way I am rather than an illness.

I donlt have an obsession with violence but I ahve lived with a lot of violence.

I went to the doctor and just described how I felt, I actually wrote it down and read it out as I often get nervous when I go to the doctor and forget whatI weant to say or chicken out.

Bi polar is a serious and life threatening condition which is to be taken seriously, it annoys me really that it has become the celebrity excuse for bad behaviour or a way of explaining away any kind of odd or deviant traits in people. Sometimes people are just different and that does not need ot be medicated away.

twinsetandpearls · 29/12/2006 23:59

I don't often do the avoiding social situations, infactI am quite the opposite as I am quite attention seeking, I only hide away when I am seriously ill.

lemonice · 29/12/2006 23:59

I am taking you seriously..though I did find your opening post was a bit hard to tell whether you were truly worried or not

do read this book whether you think you could be manic depressive or not

lots of good info on mind website and various others

do you have mood swings both depressive and manic?

manic being quite a clear batch of typical behaviours combined

cab · 30/12/2006 00:01

I think you souns poretty normal - but teh no harm in asking gp re a bit of counsellingxxxx

cab · 30/12/2006 00:01

But then I am pished - sorry about spelling.

colditz · 30/12/2006 00:02

I know I am not bipolar, as I am on Prozac, which makes BPD worse, whereas I feel better!

lemonice · 30/12/2006 00:03

lots of interest on this website and this about mental illness is interesting to ponder

Do you feel your life is affected badly by how you think/behave and do you worry or fear for for the future?

Original poster
Thaigal · 30/12/2006 00:06

Sorry Lemonice, I admit it doesnt look like I'm that worried in the post and I'm not really worried because I have learnt to live with it in the past but it has caused me a bit of trouble in relationships etc which is why I think I should get it sorted.

I feel very optomistic most of the time, I really look foward to my future as I'm pretty positive it's going to be great but to anyone looking in on me they'd see a young, single mum on benefits in a crappy council house...so should I be happy? is it all false? I don't think so...I know things wont stay like this forever. BUT I do get odd nights where I feel really down, not about my current situation but about other people, the way I have been treat in the past etc..bitterness about old memories again.

I do have manic moments, too embarrased to describe them really, put it this way, if anyone saw me somethimes I would've been locked away a long time ago. I never have bad manic moments though where I want to hurt anyone...just crazy happy ones but very OTT.

OP posts:
cab · 30/12/2006 00:08

Thaigal did you see the post on here about the husband trying to ruin a xmas present - white fluffy slippers? Think you would lovbe it. It's good to be manic sometimes.

lemonice · 30/12/2006 00:09

I don't think you sound bipolar..most people who are diagnosed with that or a disaffective personality disorder or bordeline personality disorder reach the point of diagnosis after some pretty scary and life threatening experiences

if you are concerned see the gp but rmemeber that personality is a huge spectrum

lemonice · 30/12/2006 00:11

and mental health is nothing to be ashamed of so don't worry about a gps response..make yourself some notes

it's a good idea to keep a diary for a few weeks if it's not urgent and that may help

twinsetandpearls · 30/12/2006 00:11

There is more to being bi polar than feeling a bit low,I don;t want to sound like someone from a monty python sketch who claims to have spent their childhood living in a pit eating coal but it took years of me being very ill and my life being in danger to get a diagnosis.

Original poster
Thaigal · 30/12/2006 00:14

Maybe I am worrying over nothing and I just have a "manic" kind of personality. I think councelling would be useful to go through some other stuff like the abuse then maybe the other anxiety would calm down a bit? confidence would grow etc?

I did read the fluffy slippers thing, sounded like the kind of thing I would do!

OP posts:
lemonice · 30/12/2006 00:14

I agree with ts&p

bipolar is not a diagnosis which is made lightly and in fact it is not made easily either

not sure what you mean by obsession with violence..that isn't associated with manic dperession

cab · 30/12/2006 00:18

Me too Thaigal - thought it was brilliant. What is normal? The world would be so boring if we were all the same. But if it will make your life better try counselling to clear up issues or some self help stuff with cognitive behaviour therapy? Personally i don't think there are enough mad folk around.

Original poster
Thaigal · 30/12/2006 00:18

the obsession with violence I dont understand myself, its like a feeling that if a man was the violent type you would feel protected by him? I know how this sounds and I really hope I dont piss anyone off, I know how wrong it is to think like that but sometimes I "fantasise" about being in a relationship with a violent person. Like I say I dont understand this myself, this is the kind of thing I really want to get help with because I know its far from normal.

OP posts:
lemonice · 30/12/2006 00:19

if you are bookish then here is another which is worth regarding and quite readable

mania...can be more scary than depression I think, or if mixed with depression very nasty

racing thoughts and not being able to think, or sleep for days and intolerable fear and anxiety and fiding it impossible to keep still or speak/read are some symptoms

promiscuity/inaapropriate sexual behaviour and spending money/taking risks and beleiving you are the life and soul of the party are other manic behaviours

cab · 30/12/2006 00:20

Right sort out that bit then and be happy with the rest of yourself. I'm off tro bed. Best of luck from another mad slipper woman.

lemonice · 30/12/2006 00:21

nothing wrong with fantasy..the tendency to act upon it and not recognising the difference and believe you are eg in a film or control other people is serious however