If I murder my children before Christmas day...

[DoesntChristmasDragOn]

... do I get to open their presents?

Only if she's after swapping a lemon drizzle cake for 3 dragons.

How about 3 dragons and 2 ducks and we can share the lemon drizzle, Soupy?

current thread juxtaposition on active convos:

If I murder my children before Christmas day...

Is this morally correct?

the dragons may roast the ducks with their fiery breath

This thread is making me feel better.

As is sheltering at the top of our house while the Inferiorettes do I don't care what downstairs.

I tell you what.... I'll take baby dragon and one duckling. In return you can have a massive lemon drizzle cake and DT2!

Can't say fairer than that really! Don't forget, DT2 comes with a gold star. Perfect for the tops of toppled Christmas Trees

has a deal been done then? I had to rush off and wash down a few walls

I already have a gold star at the top of my tree. The tree that is tied firmly to a small table with those webbing straps you secure stuff to roof racks with in order to prevent just the sort of mishap you speak of

"the dragons may roast the ducks with their fiery breath"

Doesn't matter ... saves me the job...

Yes but do I get to send you DT2????????????????????

You can all laugh at me now (but not too loudly)

the thing to is make them all be choristers and then they will busy earning their keep -

Oooh nasty Pami. Mine was last week - I arrived first (out of a staff base in the hundreds). I enjoyed the free hospitality for several hours before staggering home at 9pm just in time for the Royal Variety Performance broadcast in Oz.

I thought that getting home at 9pm was a pretty good effort until my A&E doctor nanny share mum arrived the next morning. After I'd breathed wine fumes over her and her very cute 2 year old, I escaped attempting to look professional - "meeting". I thought I'd got away with it but she caught me buying Alka Seltzer and chocolates in the supermarket 15 minutes later.

The shame .

Oh god. And might I add - on her way to her YOGA class.

And no doubt her lecture to her A&E students on liver damage.

Just had a glass of wine at a friend's house and all I want to do is sleep all afternoon - what do you all say? DVD on and kip on the couch or am I doomed to have the house trashed and at least one child A&Eable if I do?

I have three 4/5 year old girls here at the moment. They are so hyped up! I have run out of threats and warnings...

Oh no, Arfy
Most of the people there last night had never seen me drunk before. I've had loads of comments today (luckily all complimentary - people were crying with laughter at my attempts to cure my hiccups...)
I learned a few interesting things when I started the "I never" game too

Beety - give that DS1's report for music said that he sang "with enthusiasm" I don't think he's going to get in any choirs!

I felt so guilty today that I was so tired and grumpy with my lo's a couple of days ago (and probably ever since holidays started tbh....) and felt the need to post on this thread.

I was reading the local paper (from where I used to live) on the internet and saw an anniversary notice for the daughter of an old school friend of mine. Her dd was just about to turn 8 when she died from Leucaemia 5 years ago today. She died only a couple of weeks after being diagnosed and less than 2 months after her mother first noticed something was not right.... It was the saddest funeral I have ever been to, especially so close to Christmas.

So please let us all try to count our blessings and appreciate that we have our children with us this Christmas, no matter how maddening they may be....

mind you 'singing with enthusiamsm' is more than a couple of younger choristers do !!!