Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Other subjects
Original poster

Really not meaning to be judgemental but suspect that despite my best efforts I am

56 replies

Miaou · 09/12/2006 18:09

The dds have a friend to stay overnight. She is lovely, she has visited a lot before, though not since we moved house a couple of months ago. I know she has been really excited about coming and we have had several aborted attempts at getting them together.

Anyway - she came with a carrier bag full of overnight stuff, and a carrier bag full of sweets! No exaggeration, there must have been about £10 worth of stuff in there. I met the mum halfway because of the distance and by the time we got back to the house they had had strawberry laces, a milky way and fruit pastilles. Since being here the girl has eaten two Kinder Buenos and shared another pack of pastilles and some butterscotch sweets. I think there may have been more too. And she has still got a box of maltesers left!

She is lovely, and very generous - has shared all these with my dds. And for them, it is only a one-off, so I don't mind them having so much sugar (though I daresay I will be scraping them off the walls before bedtime ). But I can't help but wonder about the state of her health. She is a naturally skinny person but is developing a fat tum, and has several fillings, and only likes fatty, sugary processed food, which I know is what she gets at home.

Well I guess I have answered my own question - it's none of my business really! But she is nice and I hate to think that she is going to turn into a fat, pasty teenager

OP posts:
moondog · 09/12/2006 18:51

Yeah it wsa Socci,even down to mad French teacher!

niceglasses · 09/12/2006 19:02

Haribou = bad mother. The Devil send me to hell and burn in a ring of fire!

Fire!
To burn my soul
Fire!

WethreebobKings · 09/12/2006 19:06

My mum's been trying to get ds to eat smarties for 4 weeks now. He sweetly gives them back.

SherlockLGJ · 09/12/2006 19:09

DS gets raisins or a flapjack or a breadstick. He is unaware of the fact that he is deprived.

nutcracker · 09/12/2006 19:19

My Ds loves breadsticks too, has to stick them up his nose before he eats them mind you

My kids have sweets roughly twice a week. I don't buy them any tbh, but my mum and my brother do and thats fine with me as they brush their teeth well and don't drink squash or fizzy pop unless a special occasion.

Dd won a huge tub of sweets recently and I let them have something out of the tub after school, every day for a week, Since then the tubs been on top of the cupboard and they haven't mentioned it (much fgrin).

I do think it is a shame if you dd's friend eats like that all of the time.

Saturn74 · 09/12/2006 19:29

Re: "I don't know what these mothers are thinking when the child turns up with a massive bag of haribou sweets when they come to play. They are basiclaly sticking a notice on their forehead "I am a bad mother and I want to prove it to the world" or else they're as thick as a plank".

I send DS2 to his friends house with a bag of Haribo sweets to share.
It is one of the few sweets he can eat as they contain no sweeteners, no dairy and no gluten. He has sweets very rarely, and he enjoys being able to eat the same as everyone else once in a while.

I am not a bad mother, nor am I a plank.
I am not someone who would judge another person for sending their child with a bag of sweets to share with their friends either.

Miaou, I know what you mean about feeling powerless when you see children being fed this sort of food on a regular basis.
A midnight feast is such fun, and it's really kind of this child to share with your DDs, but I can understand it being upsetting to know this is not a rare treat for her.

SherlockLGJ · 09/12/2006 19:31

Humphrey

Xenia our resident shit stirrer/nutter posted that. Ignore it.

KimiTheChristmasCracker · 09/12/2006 19:37

My sons get haribo when we go to the kids club movies on saturday, and friday is cake day.
My sons are clean, healthy, the 10 year old has an I.Q that would put alot of people here to shame, they exercise, get coke to drink some times, eat organic stuff too and are NORMAL children.
Ok i know some kids eat nothing but crap, but by god why is everyone here so over the top if a child has the odd sweet, fizzy drink, or god forbid fruit shoot???? Oh and my sons both have lovely teeth.

Saturn74 · 09/12/2006 19:38

Thanks, Sherlock.
Been cooking wheat-free and dairy-free meals to go in the freezer all day, so my resistance is low!

Pruni · 09/12/2006 19:43

Message withdrawn

Judy1234 · 09/12/2006 20:14

I was just telling you what it makes me think. Obviously some people will say what kind friends and how lovely to give a present of basically raw sugar, look at the energy you get from that (... reading the Sugar council's web site if you want anything else to make you feel good about it...) some children are sugar addicted and others the odd sweets have no effect at all. I'm sure my ancestors were up trees trying to get at beehives with honey. I just don't like it when their friends come with all this sugar stuff because it's too rude to put it away and they never just eat one and then they don't want to eat anything else and I don't know why the mothers or fathers feel they have to make that connection - reward, pleasure equals sugar.

aliceband · 09/12/2006 20:31

we go on holiday to scotland and my kids lurve the sweety van that comes round they think they are in heavan.

worcestercaroline · 09/12/2006 21:02

We used to love that when we were children when we were in scotland and the van came round we would get lipstick lollies. highlight of the holiday!!

whensantagotstuckupAITCHimney · 09/12/2006 21:21

i am not recognising the scotland of which you speak. in our household a pack of smarties lasted two children a fortnight, and that was thirty-odd years ago. normal family, not hippies or anything.
my friends' children eat oatcakes and cherry tomatoes, cucumber and breadsticks by the dozen... i mention this just in case anyone is thinking that the whole of scotland is wild on cherry lips by lunchtime... not true i think.
and humph, is that true about haribo? no wonder they taste shite (speaking as a Scottish adult who enjoys the occasional sweet treat.)

hertsnessex · 09/12/2006 21:44

as its coming upto xmas and there are alot more sweet treats around, im easier going. but my boys have at least the 5 portions of fruit and veg a day (even if its a humzinger - which they think are sweets) nad do have some haribo or choc sometimes.

im having a 2-4pm tea and cake party for them tomorrow. ive cooked loads of diff cakes and biscuits and got some choc coins. as a treat this is fine. but i wouldnt do it every day, as im sure most wouldnt. its a shame this child east so much processed food, but i dont think ppl who allow there kiddies sweets are 'evil'!

cx

HumphreyCushiONtheFirstNoel · 09/12/2006 21:48

Aitch - no question that they're packed full of cack, but at least none of it is dairy or gluten based!

WonderCod · 10/12/2006 08:56

as ususla anotehr foo police thread has us ( wel you lot) justifying what you give your kids to coplete strangers

Original poster
Miaou · 10/12/2006 09:46

yes we've kind of wandered off the point haven't we? Yawn.

OP posts:
blueshoes · 10/12/2006 09:49

Agree that it is a cultural thing that pleasure equals sweeties. My dd does not care for pudding (routinely refuses it). But her nursery gives lollipops out as reward and now she is conditioned to pester for those sticky things. But she rarely finishes one, lol!

Sez me, who is a choc fiend, as is dd.

Is a sweet-tooth in-born or a product of conditioning? Even then, Miaou, it can't be good for a child to eat all those sweets - feel sick thinking about it. It is the parent's responsibility to moderate (not necessarily ban) intake, not indulge it!

TheWoman · 10/12/2006 10:58

I wonder if the mother of this 'sweet-infested' child thinks the OP is a perfect mother?

meowmix · 10/12/2006 11:06

DS'd be lucky to get near the Haribo, DH loves them. But then he grew up in the shadow of the Swizzles Matlow factory so is technically 84% sugar anyway.

BBWBabeLisa · 10/12/2006 11:13

I'm afraid it's definitely a culture thing. I'm from Glasgow (and yes moondog I'm one of those fat-arsed women but we've had this discussion before so nuff said), but currently posted down south. My mum was recently down to visit for a week and was quite disapproving of all the vegetables I am feeding my 11mth old! "Do ye not think mebbe all they vegetables are too rich for her wee stomach?". We'd be walking thru a shop and there'd be all sorts of candy crap and she'd say "would she not eat those?". To top it all the other day she's talking to me on the phone about my step-sister's little girl who is about 14-15 months. They were babysitting her and her mother brought stuff for them to give her for dinner. "A wee tin of sausages & beans, microwave chips, and a cake for afters" - this was immediately follwed by "are you sure you're feeding Lola enough??" Arrrggghhhhh

Stargazer · 10/12/2006 11:14

Meowmix - But then he grew up in the shadow of the Swizzles Matlow factory so is technically 84% sugar anyway. - I think that my must my DH you're describing. One of his reward schemes at work involves jelly babies, etc - and he never has any left after the team has been by

Original poster
Miaou · 10/12/2006 11:15

errr - why would she think that, thewoman???

OP posts:
meowmix · 10/12/2006 11:19

no definitely MY husband stargazer!

really I should feed him a better diet, but you know, what he likes Greggs sausage rolls and cola bottles....