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The mummy scoreboard - let's be honest

36 replies

JoshandJamie · 04/11/2006 20:23

Natural birth (score a point) or elective c-section
Breastfeed (score a point) or bottle
Attachment parenting or routines - tricky this one
Homemade (score a point) or jars
Organic (score a point) or not organic
Disposables or natural nappies (score a point)
Dummies or not (score a point)
Waiting 6 months to wean (score a point) or not

There was an article about this in the Times recently (so apologies for pilfering the idea) But it seems to me that parenting these days has become a board game, where whoever scores the most points wins (a virtuous pat on the back I think the prize is). By the way: just as a caveat, where I have said, score a point, it's not necessarily my view, but the views that seem to be commonly acceptable.

But I can't help thinking that no matter who you are or what you do, you justify what you do as right.

So being honest:
I breastfed both mine but not exclusively and only for about 4 or 5 months. My justification is that I couldn't get them full on just breast and at least I never had any problems transitioning them off boob to bottle

I had two natural births without pain relief and try to understand (and certainly pretend to) why others choose otherwise, but deep down I just think: you could have done it. Which I know is wrong but I'm being honest here.

I am a big fan of routines, but am quick to hold my baby to sleep if that's what it takes

I always cook homemade, never jars. I pride myself on making good meals for my kids but don't always think they have the best diet. Deep down I question whether people should use jars but I understand why they do.

Organic - not. Am just not fully convinced. I tend to buy organic kiddy snacks but not because they're organic, but because they are good snacks. I don't get why people are fanatical about this. I'm sure I will be convinced soon though.

Have never used a natural nappy in my life - am sure the world and environment is hating me for it, but I just can't face washing nappies on top of everything else I have to do.

No dummy with number one, dummy with number two and it's become a nightmare

Started weaning at about 5 months for both.

So I guess if you tally it up, I'm not brilliant, but not bad. But quite frankly, in general I feel like I'm doing a good job. Others might look at me in despair while others might think I'm some kind of tree hugging freak. I'm neither. Just a mum trying to raise happy, healthy kids. Secretly I do look at some mums at times and think that they're not doing the right thing - but we all do. What I would like is for us to all have a mutual appreciation for each other and stop giving each other a hard time.

I guess my point is: screw the scoreboard.

OP posts:
handlemecarefully · 04/11/2006 20:25

Yes screw the bloody scoreboard I agree totally - and throw into that points scored (positive or negative) for being a WOHM or a SAHM

Twiglett · 04/11/2006 20:28

you can't have any points at all cos I've got all of them

mwahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa

squints and holds up fingers and thumb "I crush your heads

JoshandJamie · 04/11/2006 20:29

oohh - completely forgot the SAHM v WOHM thing. Am a work at home mum part time. Therefore score maximum points for fulfilling myself and looking after children

OP posts:
handlemecarefully · 04/11/2006 20:33

lol twig, that's both ridiculous and rip roaringly funny (well it probably helps if you've downed a glass or two of cava as I have)

Big raspberry to J&J for her bonus points

FrannyonFire · 04/11/2006 20:37

Oh that I crush your heads thing is very very funny

NAB3 · 04/11/2006 20:38

7.................

handlemecarefully · 04/11/2006 20:40

[bemusement emoticon] - what does '7' mean? is it the new '4' ?

NAB3 · 04/11/2006 20:41

7 points but then i have been drinking.......

colditz · 04/11/2006 20:42

I love that 'I crush your head!' thing, it used to be a sketch on a show called "The kids on the wall", which was Canadian I think.

There was a strange guy who used to crush people's heads as they walked by (usually oblivious to the crushing process)

I was about 13/14 and found it hilarious.

lulumama · 04/11/2006 20:42

remind me what 4 is?

handlemecarefully · 04/11/2006 20:42

ummm so have I Nab!

lulumama · 04/11/2006 20:43

ooooppss! not even adding up... i know i'm a good mum!!

Bucketsofburntdinosaurs · 04/11/2006 20:46

Kids in the Hall. They all looked so pretty in dresses didn't they? Except the lanky geek with the fro and specs

handlemecarefully · 04/11/2006 20:49

Good for you lulumama

BATtymumma · 04/11/2006 20:50

pah! i need no scoreboard to tell me im a fab mum....i have LOADS of expert reports that say that instead

...excuse me while i vaseline my ears, i need to squeeze through a door....

MrsBadger · 04/11/2006 20:52

Crush! Crush! I am crushing your head! S

(Spent a good few years doing this and will now start using it again.)

moondog · 04/11/2006 20:55

Hmmm,am fully paid up member of sub committee that is Smugsnet but I don't really fo with the organic thing the whole time and would probably have died had I not received full quote of drugs in childbirth (followed up by a good year of intravenous Chablis and Claret.)

moondog · 04/11/2006 20:56

That 'attachment parenting' moniker is bollocks anyway.
It suggests that people who don't have sex in the vicinity of their adolescent children are not proper parents.

JoshandJamie · 04/11/2006 20:56

y'know, I've been having intravenous chablis and claret recently and I think it's a bloody fine thing.

OP posts:
JoshandJamie · 04/11/2006 20:57

what happens if you don't have sex full stop because you're too tired, do you get minus points?

OP posts:
lulumama · 04/11/2006 21:00

HMC.... at me or am i being over sensitive?

moondog · 04/11/2006 21:00

Does anyone really and truly care what other people think of them though??
I couldn't give a shit.

lulumama · 04/11/2006 21:03

i think i do...but i wish i didnt;!!

JoshandJamie · 04/11/2006 21:03

I think truly, what people think of me isnt going to change what I do, but maybe it does worry me a bit - certainly with first child. Second child I could give two hoots.

OP posts:
colditz · 04/11/2006 22:44

crush crush crush

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