Someone threw an egg at our door last night!

[Rhubarb]

I heard this thud at about 9pm but took no notice presuming it was next door closing the adjoining door to our back gardens. This morning we have found an egg splattered all over the door! No other neighbours have eggs on their doors!

We are newcomers to a little village where everyone knows everyone else so it's a bit strange for this happen! I'm just wondering if I should be more careful about the kids toys in the front garden being left there.

Welcome back to England eh?

Oh no, rhubs. That's shit, isn't it? Do you think it was probably silly teenagers bored with village life?

I think all teenagers should be made to go to boot camp until they are at least 25!

If I got my hands on them I'd wring their bloody necks! I'd rub their noses in the egg! I'd force them to lick the door clean! I'd...I'd....grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

I bet they're shaking in their DMs rhuby!

They're not cool enough to have DMs Scummy! BTW, on the night of the 'do', can I come an hour earlier? It'd give me more time to get ready. Otherwise I'll just wander around London growling at people!

We had this last year at Halloween - egg thrown at our back door and windows. Bastards.

Yes.
What footwear do they have, then?

That was yes, you can come whenever you like, btw!

I reckon they're probably of the hoody variety with designer trainers that unfortunately for them do not include the steel toecaps of the DMs so you can actually jump up and down on the aforementioned trainers causing considerable pain!

Scummy - I'll be there an hour earlier then ok?

We have just bought an axe.

Someone threw one at our window at 11.30 pm on monday night we'd just finished watching Silent Hill and nearly pooed are pants!

*our

Do you need an axe too?

BTW - nearly got that film for tonight, is it any good?

It's ok, not wonderful a bit silly really but worth a watch I suppose (that wasn't helpful at all really was it? I'm no Barry Norman!)

I like the axe idea but am thinking of playing them at their own game and keeping eggs by the front door. It's gone terrible round here lately one of the neighbours had their windows put through in a bundled revenge attack meant for the house of the idiot youf who wrecked his grilfriends car for some reason only they got the wrong house Luckily they got the house very wrong if they'd got it slighlty wrong and got it on the next corner house it would have been my windows put through with a 3 year old and an 11 month old in the room.

Hmmm, think you might need a cattle prod too, dh can get you one from the farm where he works, shall I send him round later?

And no, Barry Norman you are not!

Yes Please