Hi, I wasn't sure where to put this, so I'll plonk it here! It's a rant really, and quite long (sorry!).
Last year my younger sister (19) had a baby girl. At two and a half months, baby was rushed to hospital resus where it was eventually found that she had several subdural haematomas. Baby was is hospital for a while, and then released into foster care as SS were involved. My sister left her partner (babys father) a couple of months into the ordeal, and about four months on he admitted that he had in fact dropped baby in the week before she was admitted to A and E, had never told anyone (astounding to think he actually watched them working on her in resus and still didn't give the medics this info for babys sake! ) Anyhow...my sister breastfed her baby, and continued to express enough milk to sustain her throughout her time in foster care. I fully supported my sister throughout this time (though was admittedly tough on her when she floundered), had a lot of contact with the SS throughout, visited them (niece, sis and SS) several times in the country they were living in, ran up thousands in phone bills, etc! My niece was returned to my sister at the end of last year, when she was 8 months old. Early this year, her name was removed from the 'at risk' register. My DH and I encouraged my sister to move over to the UK, where she would have more opportunities, etc. She was extremely lonely where she was (very rural and isolated) and SS were happy with this move. The intention was for sister to stay with us for a short space of time, while she found housing, etc. Over the weekend, after she'd been here a month and done little but sit on her ar*e, we had a massive row. She said some awful things, and I threw her out. (Don't worry, they only went as far as my friend 'round the corner!) She came back a couple of days later, and apologised for what she'd said (won't go into details but I'll never feel the same about her now ). I accepted her apology and said we could talk about her moving back in, in a couple of days. I rang her today to see what was planned for her DD's 1st birthday to find that she hasn't even got her a present - because she hadn't got round to it.
She asked me to open her post, and it was a reminder about a vaccination discussion she's missed. To top it off, I gave my friend a lift to the supermarket earlier, and dropped her off to find my sister there, totally stoned.
I'm really fuming, I don't want her in my house (she watched my niece fall out of bed one evening because she'd been smoking - which I asked her not to do here), I'm outraged on my niece's behalf that her own mother hasn't bothered about her first birthday, irritated about the missed vaccine discussion, as though she has been cleared by SS, they will always keep an eye on how 'together' she is re this sort of thing. Furious that she's getting stoned after all that's happened, and anxious about my niece as my sister told me she has a cough again (she's borderline asthmatic and already had bronchitis once) and there my sister is, smoking around her.
So sorry about the rant, I'm not going to read back, just post as these are my initial feelings, and the ones I need to sort out! Any help appreciated.