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Original poster

I'm doing my effing best ...

33 replies

earlgrey · 10/10/2006 07:54

... would you expect a dd that's just turned 8, and one that's about to be 7, to be able to dress themselves in the morning?

I lay everything out for them. Shall I just threaten to turn the telly off untill they do it?

I don't mind doing their hair, 'cos they can't do it properly.

FGS. Sorry. Rant over.

OP posts:
Pinkchampagne · 10/10/2006 07:59

Sympathies! I have the same battle with my 7 year old DS every morning & it drives me to insanity!!
My 3 year old DS had got himself completely dressed & was brushing his teeth, while DS1 was running around the lounge naked this morning!
I, like you, always lay the clothes out for him too.
One thing that my HV suggested, which does work, is to buy a egg timer & set them a challange to beat the egg timer while getting dressed in the morning.
I can't find the blimmin egg timer this morning, but it does seem to work with DS!

gigglinggoblin · 10/10/2006 08:00

no tv til they are ready to go in this house, and if they dont get ready without being shouted at it doesnt go on at all. dont threaten, just switch it off (my boys are same age as your girls)

TheUnholyTrinity · 10/10/2006 08:00

no don't threaten to turn the telly off just don't have it on until they are dressed

Pinkchampagne · 10/10/2006 08:12

I have banned TV until after they are dressed too!

Amanda1 · 10/10/2006 08:40

Message withdrawn

bea · 10/10/2006 08:46

yup... usually the rule in this house.. no tv until dressed... (although we're slacking at the moment... soooo it's if you're too slow... tv goes off!!! )

lou33 · 10/10/2006 09:01

no tv in the morning here, it takes me twice as long for them to get ready otherwise

they have all got themselves dressed since they were about 5, apart from ds2 of course, but even he still does a fair bit himself

3sEnough · 10/10/2006 09:08

Agree - NO TV at all in the mornings - realised that it took at least twice as long to do everything as nobody took a blind bit of notice of breakfast, food, me etc etc. Telly is for 1 hr after school (if they're not doing something else) and that's it - lovely!

anorak · 10/10/2006 09:23

Another vote here for no TV till child dressed and breakfast eaten. Any naughtiness and no TV at all.

wanderingstar · 10/10/2006 09:36

I think your dds should definitely be able to dress themselves quite quickly. My dd is nearly 8 and I can't remember when she began to dress herself reliably. 3 maybe ? I don't lay out uniform either; she's good at picking out what she needs. No TV I'd say too. Good luck !

SecondhandRose · 10/10/2006 09:39

They get washed and dressed before breakfast and there is no TV in the mornings here.

HuwEdwards · 10/10/2006 09:45

Earlgrey, yes, they should. My DDs 3 and 5 dress themselves (3yo needs a bit of help depending upon what I put out for her to wear).

The rule in our house is breakfast and dressed and then tv (sometimes they don't want tv, and start playing so I just have to bellow at them)

misdee · 10/10/2006 09:49

i get their clothes out ready, for dd1+2 (6 and 4 years old), thery get up, washed and get dressed whilst i am sorting out their breakfast. (dd2 will have a paddy over not being able to pull her knickers or socks on, then fall over putting her trousers on, but she does try), once they have eaten, brushed teeth, got their shoes and coats ready (not on, but know where they are), bookbag and drinks under the buggy, its 8 o clock and they can watch lazy town, whilst i let the carer in, grab a quick shower and get dd3 dressed to be out the door at 8.30

AnAngelWithin · 10/10/2006 10:02

the telly is banned in the morning in this house, unless they are dressed by 7.30, and then its only on for half an hour and goes off 30 minutes before we need to be out the door for school. I really think that no telly in the morning has made a difference with my lot getting ready on time. I do put their clothes out for them the night before but they get themselves dressed and ready. My children don't complain about the no telly rule because they know that it means mummy doesn't get stressed at them!! It probably only goes on once a week in the morning anyway. The only day that they don't have to get up and dressed before the telly is on is on a sunday. I let them sit in front of the telly in their pyjamas eating their breakfast. I am convinced that the weekday routine means that they appreciate not having to do it on a sunday. It's their treat. Sorry will stop rambling now!! hehe.

princessmel · 10/10/2006 10:06

I agree with all who said NO TV untill they are all ready to go out the door.
I used to do it down to bags and coats by the door, shoes ready to go on feet. This always worked really well when I was nannying for 3 boys and had to get them and my baby son out the door for school in the morning.

Also if you had girls hair to do , they would be sitting still watching tv which should make the hair easier to do too. ( I used to nanny for 2 girls!)

joelallie · 10/10/2006 11:02

My DD gets up really early so I let her put the TV on. But she is very good about doing everything for herself usually. DS#2 sits and watches it with her and I don't get him dressed until just before we live so that his clothes don't get breakfast all over him. DS#1 isn't allowed downstairs until he's dressed or he gets catatonic in front of the TV . Still have a mare getting him to clean his teeth though....

Hattiecat · 10/10/2006 11:10

yep, def no tv in the morning my 7 yo dd used to have it on and it drove me to insanity cos she was just unable to get herself sorted. now no tv and the house is a different place in the morning.

LIZS · 10/10/2006 11:14

Time to get tough ! Definitely no tv at all in the mornings. Perhaps once she has a term of bothering to get herself ready then you could review but just cut it out of the equation for now and avoid the battle.

fgs our 5 yr old manages to dress herself and fidn book bag, swimming kit etc, although struggling a bit with her tunic now we've swtiched to winter uniform. Get it all out ready and leave her to get on with it. Make her responsible for the whole "getting ready for school", to be ready at the door at a fixed time, and ignore the whinging. If she won't do it properly send her off anyway and let her deal with the consequences at school, might focus her mind a little !

joelallie · 10/10/2006 11:23

Well not sure about the letting her deal with that at school. Tried that with DS#1's hw once - he refused to do it once to often so it didn't get done. DH's idea. DH didn't have to take a sobbing hysterical child to school the next morning and prize him off me when the bell rang.

Original poster
earlgrey · 10/10/2006 11:30

OK - so I'm all prepared to let themselves get dressed, and no telly till they've done so.

But how do I do it, as from tomorrow?

I can just envisage scenes of 'I hate you, mummy' et al.

OP posts:
Original poster
earlgrey · 10/10/2006 11:31

And them not doing it anyway .....

OP posts:
joelallie · 10/10/2006 11:33

Have a good chat with them this evening. Tell them that they are being very unfair and that thye need to be a bit more grown-up. You can't work miracles (btw I sympathise - I get up at 6.15 every day to makes sure we're all out of the house by 8.30 sharp!). Explain and get their opinions. And perhaps offer them an incentive at the weekend if they sort themselves out every morning this week.

frogs · 10/10/2006 11:39

Yes, my just-turned 7yo ds dresses himself in the morning, and he dresses his 2yo sister as well, and brushes his own teeth and hers. I don't lay the clothes out for him, how hard is it to open a drawer? I don't think much hair-brushing takes place, though.

Agree with others, why turn the telly on until they've done what they need to do to get ready for school? IMO you need to give them more responsibility for organising themselves -- tell them exactly what they need to do and by what time, give them a nice big clock and leave them to it. Tell them in advance that if they're not ready in time you're happy to take them to school in their jimjams or in their vest and pants.

LIZS · 10/10/2006 11:41

is H around to help reinforce it ? Tell the girls tonight so they can't complain they didn't know in advance what was expected.

kslatts · 10/10/2006 11:47

My DD's are 4 and 7 and they get usually get themselves dressed. We no longer have the tv on at all in the morning which has helped a lot. My 4 year old sometimes runs round naked and won't put her clothes on, today she told me she wanted to go to school naked and thought it would make the other children laugh. Sometimes they race and whoever gets dressed first gets to sit in the front of the car.

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