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Original poster

dd is so scared.......

25 replies

jld3 · 03/10/2006 22:04

I am a regular with a name change.
A man has been sending my dd suggestive text messages.
These include asking how old she is and what have you.
14 messages came through in less than 3 hours. I took this to the police and they claimed it may be mistaken identity and they cant do anything unless a crime has been committed.
dd isnt sleeping, she will not get on school bus, she is absolutely petrified, we have no idea who this person is.I will not let her out of my sight
She has had this new phone for two weeks.
Why dont these fucking weirdos leave our kids alone?

OP posts:

2shoescreepingthroughblood · 03/10/2006 22:05

how old is she

badkarma · 03/10/2006 22:05

Did the phone belong to someone before dd had it? Can your DH/DP call the number and tell him to bog off? Has your dd replied to ANY of these text messages?

hairymclary · 03/10/2006 22:07

it could well be a chancer, not someone who actually knows her.
speak to the mobile phone company and get them to ban the number

Piffle · 03/10/2006 22:07

Text back that the police are involved, this person is texting a minor FFS or ask the phone provider to assist with number barring or number changing?

Original poster

jld3 · 03/10/2006 22:09

She is 12.

OP posts:

2shoescreepingthroughblood · 03/10/2006 22:11

agree with piffle get the number changed

hairymclary · 03/10/2006 22:11

no, don't text back. if it is someone just hoping to annoy/scare someone by guessing a number then don't let them know it's in use.

just get it barred

Original poster

jld3 · 03/10/2006 22:12

shall I change her sim card

OP posts:

ThomBat · 03/10/2006 22:12

I had someone call me up on Xmas day asking for phone sex. He rang back on Boxing day. It carried on for about 6 months, about 8 calls in total. I just hung up each time or got my DP or any man in the vicinity to answer anytime an unknown number came up.

For this person to text you must have his (?) phone number. Get your husband or a male friend to call the number and explain that the texts must stop immediatley.

SnowBoo · 03/10/2006 22:12

Have you called him to see if you recognise his voice? Does he know anything about your dd? And i think you are right to keep an eye on her, so many weirdos out there!
We have one hanging round the infant schools in our area but same thing with the police, til he commits a crime theres nothing they can do.
I think they should have their balls cut off....

iamapieceofpumpkinpie · 03/10/2006 22:12

I'm sorry but "I took this to the police and they claimed it may be mistaken identity and they cant do anything unless a crime has been committed." WTF! So do they just wait for young kids to get abducted and then do something about it, when it's too late? How stupid. Why can't they do a 'sting' type thing, like they did in the paper a few days ago?

ThomBat · 03/10/2006 22:13

Befoe you call the number do 141 so he doesn't have your number, and yes gt her mobile no changed anyway.

iamapieceofpumpkinpie · 03/10/2006 22:14

Anyway, I thought 'grooming' was a crime?

Original poster

jld3 · 03/10/2006 22:26

pumpkin. so did I.

OP posts:

Original poster

jld3 · 03/10/2006 22:28

I presume that stinging is another word for setting them up.

OP posts:

iamapieceofpumpkinpie · 03/10/2006 22:33

Sorry yes, but then I suppose they would claim entrapment or some crap like that!

Blondilocks · 03/10/2006 22:52

I would change the number.

Just a thought I had: people I knew used to just make up random numbers to give to people in clubs that they'd pulled but didn't want to speak to them again. (I didn't really see the point). Don't know the chances of actually getting a live number though.

I had a phase of a random number leaving missed calls. One day I actually was able to answer it & the woman said who are you when I answered - I ranted back more to the point who are you, I have NO idea who you are, or whose number this is so leave me alone (although probably less politely!) Never bothered me again.

It could be other kids messing around. Simply having missed calls from a strange number freaked me out & I'm a grown up. It's like your personal space has been violated.

Whatever it does sound horrible for ur DD.

slug · 04/10/2006 16:49

Point out to the Police that harrassment by mobile phone is covered under Section 127 of the Communications Act 2003 regarding the improper use of public electronic communications networks. Also contact your mobile phone service and report the texts to their malicious calls bureau.

Thank to the 'Mobile Phones: what parents need to know' booklet I confiscated from an idle student in class today.

LadyDooM · 05/10/2006 13:10

I once called the fire dept... honestly because I smelled something burning in my house (this is in america) they told me to call the police out, so this went back and forth a few calls and I finally had it and asked them why did they have to wait for an actual fire when they could prevent one. Turns out some wires caught fire in my wall. They had to rip into it and we had to leave. If I hadn't been persistent we could have very well gone to bed and never woke up.

You need to push the police into doing something. Call back if the person wont help you, speak to someone else and point out that they should intervene now rather than after something actually happened that could damage your daughter for life.

LadyDooM · 05/10/2006 13:18

Also, some websites you can reverse lookup mobile numbers for a fee. Maybe you could consider that as an option, maybe get a name. I don't know how it is in the uk, but in america theres a website you can look up to see if there are anybody convicted of a sexual crime in your area. They show names, faces, where they live and what they were convicted of. If you don't have that here, we should really push for it. Its nice to know what dangers lay in wait. So necessary precautions, parents can take.

LadyDooM · 05/10/2006 13:19

sorry for the yoda ism. should have read so parents can take necessary precautions

Mumpbump · 05/10/2006 13:42

I agree with those who have said push the police. If it is mistaken identity, they will presumably find that out and no harm done. If not, they will be doing their job preventing possible problems and protecting a little girl. I'd do that first and then get a bloke to ring the number if the police still do nothing...

QueenEvil · 05/10/2006 13:44

It's rubbish that the police can't do anything. My dd had a chancer send her suggestive message about 4 years ago when she was 10.5 - we went to the station with the texts and showed them. They phoned the guy up and gave him a warning and we never heard from him again.

Original poster

jld3 · 05/10/2006 22:09

Thanks everyone for the replies.
Got new sim card for dd, she is feeling alot better. I have been taking her to school and picking her up as she is too frightened to get the bus even with her friends.(cant blame her)
A police women phoned the number to issue him a warning and he hung up, maybe he got the message.
There has been no more texts.
I still think the police should try and trap these weirdos and get as many of them off the streets as they can, lock them up, It would be a better place for our children.
Hugs to you all x

OP posts:

kenwood · 05/10/2006 22:21

I know its not the same but dn1 left home and went to stay with friends ,after a while she got her own place and moved out ,while she was there she got herself a new phone but kept the sim out of the old phone and gave the phone to one of her friends. Dn2 her sister [21]was waiting for a call about a new job offer when a man called and asked was that *&% she said it was , he then said what he would like TO DO to her, she was gobbsmacked has he knew her name ,she went stright to the police told them what the man had said and gave them his no off the phone . It turns out the man who had never meet dn2 was a 35 yr old brother of dn1 friend who she had stayed with when she first left home. Nothing was done the man , dont really know how he convince the police that he knew dn2 and he was just mucking about , he was asked not to do it again . My dn2 told them ,she didnt know him ,as in never met/seen /heard of him , the police didnt think it was worth taking any further has he was married and only there to visit his sister

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