Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Other subjects
Original poster

Stupid Things Non Parents have said to you

66 replies

Pennypocket · 10/04/2004 11:08

I know there is already a thread on this somewhere bt I can't find it so thought I would start another.

A 19 year old girl I sit near at work has just turned to me and another Mum and said the only reason why some newborn babies wake in the night is because they are not being fed properly in the day. I informed her when she decides to have kids she will be in for the shock of her life. I have never met anyone whos newborn didn't wake in the night - does that mean everyone I have met including myself is guilty of neglect??!!!!

OP posts:
Grommit · 10/04/2004 16:26

I went to see a daycare nursery which looked promising - nice location, converted barn, lots of space open countryside - inside was like an orphanage - a row of 12 kids around 2yo sitting in highchairs being spoon fed - the carers were walking up and down the row putting spoonfuls of food in the kids mouths one after the other like feeding machines- kids all too quiet - very depressing.

hilz · 10/04/2004 23:54

I agree its often the mother or mil who say the most odd and insensitive things. It seems as tho they have forgotten what it was like. According to my mother my ds 'would not be so difficult if he was mine'...of course she says i was so easy, reading at 3 1/2 etc etc. I have also been told that 'potty training at 3 months' nonsense. It was the 'thing' in about 1942. I think it went like this: 7am feed, 7.30 hold potty under bum, 7.40 pram on doorstep.11am feed 11.30 potty under bum 11.40 pram on doorstep....

hercules · 10/04/2004 23:55

That the one hilz.

Ghosty · 11/04/2004 02:07

A non parent friend came to see me 4 days after DS was born. When I opened the door she looked at me up and down and said, "I thought you had the baby ... "
I nearly slammed the door in her face!

jmg1 · 11/04/2004 07:47

Message withdrawn at user request

motherinferior · 11/04/2004 10:36

Parents and non-parents alike ask me 'Are you managing to get a bit of work done now?' and 'How do you manage work now DD1 is bigger?'

I tend to find that pointing out I earn more in four days (with childcare) than DP does in five shuts them up.

twiglett · 11/04/2004 10:43

message withdrawn

annalou10 · 11/04/2004 11:27

When I was pregnant, I HATED it when non parents (usually my dh's male friends) said things like, "Bloody hell girl, you're looking FAT!" I felt like punching them or bursting into tears!

AussieSim · 11/04/2004 11:33

"I've never heard of people having trouble breastfeeding before." (from SIL when my nipples were cracked and my DS was premmie and had jaundice).

moominmama86 · 11/04/2004 12:01

When ds was a few weeks old, colicky and sleeping about 3 hours at night, and I thought it was a good day if I managed to get out of my dressing gown by 3pm, a gay male friend said to me 'So, are you not getting any writing done at the moment, then?'

FFS!

musica · 11/04/2004 12:37

Oh I've got the best one. I was 37 weeks pregnant and was singing somewhere, when someone I knew but hadn't seen for a long time asked if I was still working in the same place - I said yes, for one more week, and then I'm off to produce....patting my HUGE bump. Male friend carried on obliviously " Oh right - is that for the BBC?" - as everybody else in the room collapsed on the floor hysterically.

musica · 11/04/2004 13:26

...when I say best one, I don't actually mean that....just thought it was funny. Didn't mean to say it was better than the others!

Angeliz · 11/04/2004 13:32

lol musica......you sound like me, ..

(justifying your comments)

merglemergle · 11/04/2004 13:48

2 days after I went back to work, missing my son all the time etc...

One woman said to me "I wish I could work 3 days a week.".

(but you could-you too could take a 2/5 pay cut and spend most of the remainder on childcare...)

Same woman a few days later-discussing luxury and non-luxury items (relevant to job,long story). "Of course, childcare is a luxury, even for working parents.".

(Who needs a nursery when you've got a nice tree and a length of rope?).

When I was about 20 though I did once say "Do they really need all that stuff?" to a friend who had a newborn baby. Thus I think my karma is coming back to haunt me. She was very understanding and just swore a bit at me.

motherinferior · 11/04/2004 19:26

When I was pregnant with dd1, someone wanted me to do some work travelling round the country the month before she was due; I said I just couldn't face it, and she said 'oh, yes, you'll still be pregnant'...yeah, right, obviously the minute I've dropped the sprog I'll be back on the treadmill!

Actually, thinking about it, she obviously did think that way because three days after I'd had the baby - and she'd got my birth announcement - she sent me a letter saying she hoped I was enjoying my baby and, by the way, she wasn't going to pay my invoice in full.

melsy · 11/04/2004 19:39

Some of these are soo funny but sime just make you wanna go gggggggrrrrrrrrr!!

A fiance of a friend said "you rather anal" , to my writing down of all my dds feeding and bowel movements in the early stages when she wasnt gaining wieght. I felt I had to justify my reasons.

The same girls future husband &my dhs oldest Uni friend. said that her dinner made him "feel sick", he then sat there wretching, the silly sod . I sooo wanted to pour the lot over his head. but my dd 's need was greater. Lets say they have both come down HUGELY in my estimations.

Babsy · 11/04/2004 22:16

My daughter is autistic and whenever it rained a large hole on the grass verge just next to the playground would turn into a muddy puddle.
The teachers says to me one day " we are having a real problem from stopping your daughter from trying to jump in the puddle every time it rains. What can we do to stop her ?"
I just replied " You could try filling in the hole "

champs · 11/04/2004 22:34

"why cant you come out?" friend always asked me when ds1 was a baby.... erm and where did they want me to put him... in a backpack?

champs · 11/04/2004 22:35

to a club that is

Paula71 · 11/04/2004 23:03

"I am a stay at home mum."

"Oh so you are not working then?"

I have toddler twins. Noticably the working parents on hearing I am a SAHM, roll their eyes in horror and ask why I am still sane!

nightowl · 12/04/2004 02:25

ds was three weeks old in SCBU, ex dh had been holding him for about an hour (very nervously) due to all wires, tubes etc attached to him. ds started to cry. midwife strides over "well he doesnt like YOU much does he?" with no hint of mirth. Stupid cow.

buzzybee · 12/04/2004 08:25

I'm personally a great fan of the "your baby's crying" or "your baby looks cold" brigade of helpful people ever on the lookout down every high street in the country!

juniper68 · 12/04/2004 08:46

nice one babsy. And did they fill the hole in?

I just say to those who ask if I work 'yes i've just said I'm a mum'

Goingcrazy · 12/04/2004 22:55

Quote from mother when DD2 was a very difficult 2 year old. " Well you and your brother never behaved like that" or "You'd have got a smack on the bottom if you'd behaved like that" Thanks mum!

Bugsy2 · 13/04/2004 16:31

Mine are just coming up two and 4.5 and a non-parent said "Ah yes, they're so adorable at that age!" ..... not, on my planet they're not!!!