Life "hacks" - ways you secretly stay ahead of the pack?

[tarquinandjocasta]

By this I don't mean those crap Take a Break tips that are going round the internet - use a trouser hanger to hold your recipe book. More like things that you do, that give you a bit of an "edge" no matter how trivial.

I am having a crisis of confidence day - feeling a bit like I'm not good enough.

I'm just wondering if others have secret ways of feeling better about trivial stuff that doesn't really matter in the big scheme of things.

Obviously MN itself is a bit of a secret and a great way of finding stuff out/researching without "letting on" to people in RL….

If I am feeling lazy, I buy plain fairy cakes and ice them myself fancily filling with lemon curd and piling on the buttercream and pass them off - people think I am quite the domestic goddess.
I warm shop bought biscuits in the oven too.

There must be other things that you don't 'fess up to in RL?

Ah thanks may I have your housekeeper

Sure thing - it's the best £50 I spend each week. (She does 2 mornings, we are not in downtown abbey.

I lie down for 30-60 minutes every afternoon - I don't sleep but read in peace. This gives me a massive energy boost for the rest of the day.

Good haircut that suits your hair's natural inclination so you can wash and leave with minimum having to fiddle. For me, that's a messy blunt cut bob with a fringe.

Sunglasses, powder, lipstick....quicker than make up and always looks good.

Trench coat. Goes with everything. Chuck on over anything and belt tightly. Bung on sunglasses and lippy. Always looks presentable enough for the school run.

Be choosy about who you spend your time with. People who are very needy/dramatic are very wearing. (I don't mean otherwise lovely people who are having a crisis and are totally deserving of your support vis, my friend who is nursing her DH with a very painful terminal condition, makes less fuss and demands on friends than another person for whom not getting a prime car park spot at the supermarket is a disaster of epic proportions).

Pay it forward with play dates etc. Get in first and have a few kids over for teA etc, then when you need a favour you will feel more able to ask.

I know MN is full of shop around for bargains type advice, and I am on a fairly tight budget myself, but shopping around is very time consuming. Find one or two reliable suppliers and then stick with that for say 6 months, before setting aside a small bit of time to see if you need to swap to someone else.

Only offer that which you have. This includes time and skills. I don't bake for cake sales ever because I don't have that skill. But I can offer to tidy the accounts up at year end because that's a skill I do have. Also just because you've volunteered once doesn't mean you have to do it again if you don't have time.

Opt out of stuff early so no one relies on you or thinks you 'might be persuaded'. When my eldest joined a school at 5, I said to the PTA lady "I can't help as I am often away with work. But I will always buy raffle tickets". She thanked me for letting her know. I was never asked again but was always a generous buyer of raffle tickets.

On a similar note, keep an updated CV that you review every 6-12 months, so that if you end up in a position where you want or need to look for a new job, it's not such a mammoth task.

Also helps with appraisals etc.

Love this thread (esp. the escalator shoe-cleaning and house full of animals tip)
My ones would be: take a healthy breakfast to eat at work while checking my emails first thing- it mean I can leave home 10mins earlier and saves about 20mins extra on the traffic jams
Also try and fall for someone who has lived independently and sees cleaning as a joint responsibility, not yours to organise or allocate.
Learn to ignore a low level of everyday chaos but be organised about the big stuff. Don't care what other people think about the way you live so long as it works for you and yours. Also I have a regular 3 weekly meal plan rotation with linked shopping lists which I wrote while on maternity leave with my 2nd DS a few years back. I hate meal planning and because some things feature every week and others don't and I rotate through seasonal veg my other half hasn't noticed yet.... All I have to do is add the everyday/ packed lunch/ breakfast stuff to the list and I don't have to think about what to plan. It has saved me hours over the years I think.
Also a bread maker with a fast programme and keep the ingredients in- for those evenings when you realise you have no bread for the morning. Flour etc. keeps for ages

I do escalator shoe cleaning.
Our yard is pretty wet and muddy in Winter, I often realise my shoes are out of place in the town.

thesaurusgirl, I think the success of the cutting out depends on your attitude to it. Genuinely committing to not using up energy on the toxic individual or worrying about what they think has no impact on 'social capital', and doesn't need to affect your relationship with a wider group, if that's what you're referring to.

I've done it successfully twice in my life and am better off for it (although I am an introvert so may find it easier than most to disengage).

Reviewing objectives regularly and keeping CVs updated are also very good tips.

I don't know if this counts but I have a life plan in excel. I have our mortgage, savings, monthly expenditures all there. I have projected childcare costs for next few years and we used it when relocating, it really helped us work out where we could afford to live. Ive adapted it slightly and now I'm using it to budget for possible house renovations and retirement, even though they are decades away.

Before we moved i started looking up nurseries and childminders shortly before we put our house on the market. It meant we could take our time and didn't feel pressured to accept anyone because we had a house lined up.

Also I keep a half-arsed eye on what the interest rates are doing, and always try to overpay even just a little bit of the mortgage each month. That way I know if hard times ever hit, we have some reserves already with the lender to help tide us over.

Don't iron and buy a 9kg washing machine

Be respectful and supportive to people lower than you in the workplace hierarchy. Sounds obvious but it is really important, firstly for being a nice human being and secondly for receiving support and information from them when you really need it.
For presents, buy adults vouchers for experiences - theatre/movie tickets. days out etc rather than things. There is too much stuff.

Don't gossip. Develop a reputation as a person who is really trustworthy and does not pass on information or speculate about others. This reputation is gold compared to the cheap thrill of having a bit of gossip to pass on.

Sorry, one more.
Be politically aware. Vote. If you are a woman, your right to vote was precious and hard won. Use it. Talk to your DC about local, national and global issues.

My life hack would be this:

If you come across a thread on mumsnet that looks really interesting but you just don't have the time to read it all, post a random message as a way of secretly marking your place.

No one will ever guess what you are doing and you can sneak back tomorrow and read the whole thing properly

Night x

Seagull

Get gadgets that use the same couple of types (eg USB / micro USB) and have them in useful places around the house for everyone to use.

Similarly for xbox etc, chargers that plug into the controller from the box, so they are always ready to use. And get headphones.

Family calendar on the wall, forms and letters on the fridge.

Don't meal plan or online shop if you pass a food shop everyday - takes 5 minutes to pop in and choose whatever you fancy, and that fits the time you have to cook it in. And buy something to sling in the slow cooker for the next day, if necessary.

Drive an automatic if you spend time in crawling traffic. Listen to the radio, mix up the stations, so you get local, national, books, current affairs, drama and music and random stuff you weren't looking for

One of my mother's. When doing a supermarket shop put the white wine in the bag with the frozen food and it will be chilled by the time you get home.

I research recipes when commuting or waiting for the children, take screenshots and then use them as my meal plan for the week.

My phone gallery is kids, recipe, dog, kids, kids, recipe.

Also this is more of a long term life hack: I am eternally grateful I taught the kids to cook when they were little even though it was a pain in the arse at the time.

It is paying off now big time

My life hack (which I realised far too late) is: look at how your (successful) male colleagues are doing their jobs, and copy them. I used to do so much of that extra "wife work" kind of work - admin, busywork, people work, extra bits of stuff, being available, being nice, being super-prompt on email etc. Then I had a baby and no time and looked at what my colleagues were doing, and they sure as hell weren't doing all that extra busywork stuff. Now I just don't do it, no-one has noticed, I get just as much work done and funnily people seem to think I am more important. Finally, I'm doing my job like my male colleagues are doing theirs, and I don't know why it took me so long!

When I don't have a lot of time, I Google Bookmark web pages to read later.

Like this one...

planet waves you are dead right. I noticed that far far too late. I was "Mrs super nice washing up all the tea cups" even though I was a senior manager. I just became exhausted.

When you're on a training day or somesuch tedious event, and you know they will pick on everyone eventually to "volunteer" for something embarrassing, volunteer early on. They always make the reluctant volunteers do the really shameful stuff.
If you want to get information out of soneone, leave an uncomfortable amount of silence at strategic points in the conversation. About 5 seconds is usually enough to make them crack. Look interestedly at them throughout so they know you are still in communication, but wait until they talk.
Walk fast, spot the gaps between people and dodge into the gaps. I always arrive at places feeling I've already won a bit, because I beat the plodding pedestrians on the way from the station.