Wedding anniversary today and i feel........

[kimi]

well i dont know how i feel tbh.
DH and i split in may, i have a new DP and DH and i are getting on better then we have in years, but i dont know how im ment to feel today, we are still married, got to sort out the divorce still.
But it feels so odd, no cards no good wishes from family and friends, been thinking how i felt 14 years ago, and where and why it all went wrong.

We looked so young and full of promise in our wedding photos, i feel sad, sad for what we have lost and sad for all the things we did not do.
Am i being silly?

Cant say as i hanvet been there, but your life is full of more opportunities than it was in may......theres a whole different furute out there for you.

good luck

cx

Thank you, DSs wanted to know if it was still ok to say happy anniversary

You're not being silly at all.

Just because you've split up and met someone else you are still entitled to grieve . You wouldn't be human if you didn't feel strange today. Can you talk to your DH or your new DP or would that cause more problems?

The first year after a break up is always the worst, after that it does get easier.

keep your chin up, get through today and it will all seem better tomorrow.

thank you , i guess it sounds silly but i do feel like im greving for something i lost

Hey kimi, I am here for you.

I don't think marriages can be deemed failures just because they come to an end. They are only failures if they were never happy and nothing good came from them.

Your marriage was a good thing and a lot of good came from it. It ended but your relationship with your DH hasn't and you still have your DSs and the love of your extended family (this bit of it anyway!!)

Remember your wedding day with happiness. xxx

thank you anorak, just being silly i guess,

Not silly at all! It is like a bereavement in a way. Although your ex is still around, you have lost something and things may never be the same. The love you felt for him will be different to any love you feel for anyone else. No one relationship is ever the same. So I would say that you are still grieving over that relationship and you should be nice to yourself, give yourself a treat today. Next year you will feel a little better about it all.

I think about the good things and im so greatful that i got to spend 21 years of my life with such a wonderful man, that i was blessed with two wonderful boys, and that i got such nice people in my life (you,L and N and your familys).
I am sad i did not make it work.

It takes two. Don't be sad. You have nothing to recriminate yourself for.