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Original poster

religious playgroups..when you're not religious

25 replies

MissChief · 14/09/2006 08:45

does it matter if you don't believe?
Went along a couple of days ago to a church playgroup with baby and was rather overwhelmed (mainly with boredom, tbh) to find that a good 30 mins was spent on "Jesus loves you" type songs (hell, not even proper hymns) followed by prayer before the LOs could even get down and play!
To be fair, everyone was v friendly but i felt rather hypocritical to be there when i'm not a Christian (i had said up-front that I wasn't tho). Thought crossed my mind that i can't be alone in thinking this, unless i live in an unusally god-fearing community .
What do people think? Do you go along anyway and hold yr tongue or do you avoid these gps like the plague?

OP posts:
FioFio · 14/09/2006 08:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
MissChief · 14/09/2006 08:50

that's what I thought, OTT for LOs, isn't it? mine wdn't/cdn't stay still and so i thought, sod it and just let him have a good crawl around thro all the happy-clapping. Bit actually as not exactly mainstream and it's in a really small place where we cd do with a more relaxed group to go to every wk. Sure many mums are put off!

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 14/09/2006 08:54

Can you turn up late?

We used to go to one that had the songs at the end. We'd leave early

Original poster
MissChief · 14/09/2006 08:55

did that last term once but was gently reminded by several helpers of the start time. maybe i should brazen it out though!

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 14/09/2006 08:56

Sing rude words to the songs?

Original poster
MissChief · 14/09/2006 08:57

ooh, you are naughty! I live in a very, very small place (in more ways than one!)

OP posts:
roastrootveg · 14/09/2006 14:39

some inside information!
The church 'playgroup' that is named after
undersized sea creatures, was always known
as the 'pram service' and was more a sort of
service for toddlers with playing, craft,
socialising afterwards I think. It used to
say 'prayer and praise' on the posters but
it changed its name recently and I don't think
it does anymore. Sounds like the format is the
same though. Not really my thing - I went once

  • but some of my friends were regulars. I'm sure you would be welcome there, but if you don't feel comfortable, the Monday morning baby and toddler group is a great place to meet people.

Hope that is not too cryptic.

lucy5 · 14/09/2006 14:39

I used to go to church play groups but relgion was never mentioned.

lucy5 · 14/09/2006 14:41

or even religon.

lucy5 · 14/09/2006 14:43

or even religion, god I have pregnancy brain!

roastrootveg · 14/09/2006 15:12

MissChief,
should add that the Monday group is not a
a church group - its in the memorial hall -
or always was -
and hey, it's not that small

roastrootveg · 14/09/2006 15:13

btw how is it going? Is your child
settling in ok at school?

Flamesparrow · 14/09/2006 15:16

The one I went to put the songs and praying right in the middle before the poor kids got their juice and biscuits. They had to sit nicely and thank jesus for food for a good 10 mins before they got their juice

Stopped going.

Original poster
MissChief · 14/09/2006 16:27

hmm, think i might give it one more chance (and be late again) and go elsewhere if it's no better. Time's too precious tbh as I work most days and want to do things we both enjoy on my days off.
btw, hi RVV - thx for the inside info (don't worry, not too cryptic!) Yes will try that one when I can, sounds more me! Sch's fine so far, how are you & yrs?

OP posts:
Original poster
MissChief · 14/09/2006 16:28

RRV even, can't keep up with yr name, there's a theme going on there

OP posts:
chestnutter · 14/09/2006 16:32

I once turned up accidentally at a church play group - I was trying to find a music session nearby but I got mixed up and just followed the buggies in, thinking I was in the right place. By the time I'd got in and realised my mistake I felt too embarrassed to turn around and walk out, so I stayed in the church and stuck it out - despite being Jewish and not having a clue what was going on!!

HRHQueenOfQuotes · 14/09/2006 16:35

Sounds a bit like the format the one at our church is. We start of in the church itself,

Open with "here we are at toddler church" (sung to the tune of here we go round the mulberry bush) complete with actions for each verse.

Then have a short story, usually with 'props' for the children to get involved with. (This week was Noah and the Ark - cue large cuddly ark and big colourful story book and lots of animal noises).

We then sing our 'prayer song' (complete with actions) and say a really short prayer. Then we have another children's (religious) song based loosely around the subjectc for that week (this week was "rise and shine" - lots of actions of course.

Then we do birthdays and bapitism anniversaries (complete with singing happy birthday and blowing the candles out on the 'cake' - round cardboard cake LOL).

Then it's time to get the instruments (drums, tambourines, shakers etc etc) out and march round the church (usually) to We are Marching in the Light of God........usually very noisy and not much singing.

Get back, take the collection (and sing thankyou for the world so sweet). Say another very short prayer (the Toddler Church prayer) and then finish with "Two little eyes to look to God" - lots of actions.

Notices (Family Service, Afterschool Service etc etc) and finish with "I'm a little teapot short and stout"........

Then off down to the church hall for juice, biscuits and play.

HRHQueenOfQuotes · 14/09/2006 16:35

Sounds a bit like the format the one at our church is. We start of in the church itself,

Open with "here we are at toddler church" (sung to the tune of here we go round the mulberry bush) complete with actions for each verse.

Then have a short story, usually with 'props' for the children to get involved with. (This week was Noah and the Ark - cue large cuddly ark and big colourful story book and lots of animal noises).

We then sing our 'prayer song' (complete with actions) and say a really short prayer. Then we have another children's (religious) song based loosely around the subjectc for that week (this week was "rise and shine" - lots of actions of course.

Then we do birthdays and bapitism anniversaries (complete with singing happy birthday and blowing the candles out on the 'cake' - round cardboard cake LOL).

Then it's time to get the instruments (drums, tambourines, shakers etc etc) out and march round the church (usually) to We are Marching in the Light of God........usually very noisy and not much singing.

Get back, take the collection (and sing thankyou for the world so sweet). Say another very short prayer (the Toddler Church prayer) and then finish with "Two little eyes to look to God" - lots of actions.

Notices (Family Service, Afterschool Service etc etc) and finish with "I'm a little teapot short and stout"........

Then off down to the church hall for juice, biscuits and play.

HRHQueenOfQuotes · 14/09/2006 16:35

ooops - sorry didn't mean to post twice

Original poster
MissChief · 14/09/2006 16:39

that's all right. Sorry, hope i haven't caused any offence,HRH - or indeed to anyone .
it's just it's not for me and i had been to church groups where we used to live which were much more low-key and therefore, for me, less off-putting. I suppose i thought this one wd be similar.

OP posts:
HRHQueenOfQuotes · 14/09/2006 16:42

no offence caused - the one you've gone to sounds rather 'heavy' handed - the two women that plan each week work really hard to make sure it's not all 'sitting around listening' - lots of 'action' songs, the drums, - and as the toys and squash etc are in the hall there's no children clammering for those before it's time.

MagicGenie · 14/09/2006 16:59

In your shoes, I wouldn't go again as I'm a non-believer and wouldn't feel comfortable a) cos of the religious content and b) cos I'd feel like I was offending those there who do believe.

I went to a playgroup held at and run by a local church, which had no religious content and you didn't have to be a church member to go.

For their last meeting before the Summer holidays they had an 'extra' session where we were all asked to go into the main church; some of the children appeared dressed as sheep. Me being naive thought people had been asked to come in fancy dress as an animal and that I'd missed that request, so I kicked myself for not putting any effort in!

However, it turned out to be a sermon (effectively) on how we are all part of Jesus' flock etc etc and the kids were encouraged to sing religious songs in praise of God and Jesus.

I was furious. I appreciate/accept that many people do believe and have faith, but I felt this session was pushed on everyone and I had absolutely no control over whether my son heard it or not.

I left and have never been back.

jenkel · 14/09/2006 17:10

I go to a church playgroup and it is not at all religious, its a Baptitst church and the playgroup is in the church building. Perhaps the christmas party is a bit more religious, but then thats not a bad thing, its good for children to know the true meaning of christmas. But at the normal playgroup, no hyms, no prayers just a normal playgroup and it is really a lovely playgroup.

I think I would feel slightly uncomfortable in the sort of playgroup that you have mentioned.

texasrose · 15/09/2006 19:14

hi! I actually run a "religious" (well, church-based anyway) playgroup and when I first started running it I tried to introduce Christian toddler type songs but pretty soon realised that I was the only christian there and the other women were just being polite by trying their hardes to sing along! What we've ended up doing is doing all the normal playgroup stuff and singing nursery rhymes but finishing off with the same little rhyme "God's love is like a circle". We also have flyers out with times of our church services for people to take if they want to. Do you think that this is a better approach? If I asked the other women here they'd just be polite (they are a lovely bunch!)

MagicGenie · 16/09/2006 12:52

texasrose, I do think what you've done is a better approach.

I don't know the song 'God's love is like a circle', but admit that type of song would scare me (no offence to your faith intended )

However, if you feel strongly that there should be some 'religious' content, how about songs that are based around Bible stories e.g. 'Who Built the Ark?' or 'Peter Hammers with One Hammer'?

That way the Mums can explain what the songs are about in their own way, if they want to. That's what I'd prefer, anyway.

(Probably not explaining myself very well but hopefully you follow my drift!)

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