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Original poster

Does it matter what month a baby is born?

44 replies

beansprout · 12/09/2006 15:25

We are trying [sic] to have baby number 2. I have it in the back of my mind somewhere that it would be "better" if a baby is born earlier in the academic year rather than later. I'm really not sure what that is based on. Everyone in my family is a winter baby, so it may be that but also I think I am concerned about a child being the youngest in class or year.

Please feel free to tell me I am being irrational because at the moment I think I should put everything on hold and only go back to ttc somewhere around Christmas!

And I am really not making any comments on anyone I know that was born in July / August, so please, please don't take offence as I am really not trying to upset anyone. I'm just a bit mad but would appreciate your thoughts - if anyone knows what I am talking about!!

OP posts:

bea · 12/09/2006 22:05

my dd1 was born in july and i was heartbroken at the thought of her starting school so young but it hurt me a lot more than it hurt her... she took to it like a fish to water and like i said it was more traumatic for me thane her... so i've had such a good experience with her i base my opinion on how she settled in... also it's quite nice her being the youngest of the class as there is no pressure on her... and everything that she does is great because she's coping ever so well being the youngest and all that!

ds1 was born in feb so he'lll basically be in the middle so no probs there....however...

no3 due in beginning of oct will be a winter baby.... something i'm not really looking forward to, already mentioned for dark nights,,, get up in dark... go to bed in dark... cold and wet... can't get out... not to mention it'll be one of the oldest of it's school year... etc etc...

but then again trying to put a positive spin on it...

due beginning of oct... then there's halloween... then there's bonfire night... then mad rush upto christmas... so it should take my mind off that tiny baby satge (something i'm not too fond of!)

ideally if it were up to me... (if all went according to plan but these things never do of courase!!!)... i would like to have a baby in april... just as it's getting warmer and i love spring... getting lighter... leading upto summer etc...

sigh! i think i've waffled on enough!!!!

re: school etc... it basically comes down to the sort of child they are... tehy will cope whatever...

eidsvold · 13/09/2006 03:11

i personally think it depends on the child as to how they take to school not what month they were born in.

ghosty · 13/09/2006 04:27

Haven't read all the posts ...
As an ex teacher I would personally prefer a winter baby (if you are in the UK) ... There is a big difference (not academically, but maturity wise) between a 4, nearly 5 year old child and a just 4 year old child IME.
Having said that, I didn't think about that when I got pregnant with my two. DS was an 'accident' (born in November) and I didn't care when DD was born as I was desperate to get pregnant and have a healthy pregnancy/baby - having suffered a miscarriage ... (she was born in Feb fwiw).
My niece is just 4 (born at the end of August) and has just started school which, in my opinion is far too young for formal school ...
If if really matters to you and you can orchestrate and successfully plan the birth date of your baby (give or take a month or two) then I would go for a winter baby.

Now I am in NZ, none of that is really relevant as all children start on their 5th birthday regardless of what time of year it is.

threebob · 13/09/2006 05:08

We are in NZ and Ds was born in Feb, which is great for me - because I'm a music teacher and so he goes to school at the same time my academic year starts and I can increase my hours, add extra classes etc. when people start to look in Feb/March. It will make stuff all difference to him though - he'll be ready when he's ready.

belgo · 13/09/2006 05:44

My first baby was born end february, a lovely time of year as we had the whole summer to look forward to and the mornings and nights were getting lighter. She wasn't ill for seven months, when it was winter. My second dd was born in september and that was totally different. We only had the cold dark days of autumn and winter to look forward to and from the age to two months she picked up every bug going. Things only started to get better from the following spring. Next time, I will certainly try and make sure my baby is due in spring.

Charleesunnysunsun · 13/09/2006 07:18

I don;t mind when my kids are born as long as it's not September! That's more becuase i already have ds, dp, mil, and pil's birthdat this month all within 2 weeks of each other!

Luckily im not due untill November!

1Baby1Bump · 13/09/2006 07:39

my eldest is july and youngest sep!

throckenholt · 13/09/2006 07:55

haven't read the rest of the thread, but ....

academically - if they are born September or October they are older when they go to school (in current UK system) so they are old for their year and consequently often find the work easier in the initial years - so maybe that helps boost their academic confidence. Anecdotally I know a huge number of PhD people who have September birthdays (me and DH included). MY DS1 is a July baby, started school at just after 4 and was nowhere near the reading etc level of the older (particularly girls) in his year - luckily it so far seems not to bother him.

On a more immediate practical level - it is much easier getting up in the night in the summer than the winter - I have a July and a January and July was by far the easier at 3am !

jenkel · 13/09/2006 08:15

Proabably long term it makes no difference, but August birthdays are so young to start reception, my dd turned 4 in August and is now in full time reception and she does seem very young, I'm certainly not ready for her to go to school and I dont actually think she is.

However, we have always managed to have lovely outdoor birthday parties for her.

DominiConnor · 13/09/2006 08:20

At DS school they do interviews for entry at 4. Yes, really welcome to the British education "system".

They say they allow for the fact that kids may be 25-30% younger than others, but only 2 in his class were born after Christmas.
Selection is an increasing trend, and you buy your kids a few % on getting to where your want them to be by getting them born in September.

singersgirl · 13/09/2006 08:34

I've heard the same of selective schools here. One highly regarded girls' independent, which selects in the January before Reception (so summer-born children are still 3.5) says it chooses "the best of the summer born children" and invites them back in a separate cohort to re-assess them. But in my friend's daughter's class of 22, only 5 birthdays are after Christmas and only 2 after March.

It makes sense, since, however bright a child, a 3.5 year old can't do what a nearly 4.5 year old can. Just think of our own children....

It is the emotional readiness side that is more of a concern for me than the academic side - from my own experience. My boys both have had no trouble keeping up with the school stuff, DS2 particularly, butthey were simply not ready by Y1to sit still and write for large parts of the day.

Bozza · 13/09/2006 08:43

DS was born Feb and DD May. It was lovely having all summer off for my maternity leave. And so much easier to get out of the house. And DD has been able to have some outside parties. She is a few months away from being the youngest in the year. Also since we have January intake here she will be a very similar age (ie 4 1/2) to what DS was when he started in the September. But will have lost that term of schooling. However she could well be celebrating her 18th birthday by sitting an A-level if they still have them then. The problem with DS's birthday is the lack of outdoor parties. But it generally falls at half term so we quite often have a family day out and then have his party at the weekend.

belgo · 13/09/2006 09:00

my birthday is late august so was always the youngest in my year. Added to this I was put up a year so was two years younger then some of my classmates. This caused no problem for me, but I have always felt older then my years. And it meant that I graduated uni aged 20.

foundintranslation · 13/09/2006 09:02

I have a mid-May baby. It was nice being out and about with him in the summer, but the first 4 weeks (lovely weather) I was stuck inside anyway due to first, him being in hospital, and second, terrible trouble establishing bf. His starting to walk coincided with this summer, which was lovely.

I've just miscarried - was due in April So you really can't plan it.
(I'm not going to say be grateful for what you've got because I don't imagine anyone on this thread is not grateful for their babies, autumn, winter or otherwise)

Now I am hoping for an autumn baby. I imagine it will be lovely to be cuddled up inside for long feeding sessions. And then when they start becoming more aware of their surroundings and interacting with them, crawling etc. - spring arrives. Not thinking about the school thing very much at this stage tbh.

curiosity · 13/09/2006 09:03

Two late summer babies - both flying academically.

One Autumn baby - struggles.

Depends on the child.

DominiConnor · 13/09/2006 09:07

I think behaviour is a big thing in our school selection, though we did get notes beforehand telling us not to hire coaches for the interviews at 3.5 yo.

I felt uncomfortable about the whole thing. I went to crap schools and DS place is about as different as can be.
Being pushy parents we therefore played the game to win.
The point at which I realised it was having a negative effect upon us, was at the interview stage. Was a gang of 3.5 yos.
One wouldn't let go of his mummy, another wasn't at all happy to go with the stange lady, and another started screaming in the classrom. At each stage Mrs. D and I exchanged knowing, smug looks, since the ration of boy applicants to places is very high, and there was one less to beat.
What sort of system makes normal nice people like us (well, usually), wish 3.5 yo kids to fail and be unhappy ?

prettybird · 13/09/2006 09:18

... depends on where you live: in Scotland the cut-off date is the end of Feburary, so a March baby would be the amongst the oldest in the year. I say "amongst", as in many case, kids who are born in the second half of the year (ie from September onwards), if they are not ready, don't start until the following August, so they are the oldest in the year.

Ds' birthday is in Sptember and we knew we had the option of not sending him but he was ready (or rather, would have been bored if we'd waited; he is still "young" maturity wise for his year). His best firend is nearly a year older than him - his birthday is in December and his parents decided to wait a year before sending him to school.

wanderingstar · 13/09/2006 09:41

I have 1 in each season !
Ds1 (July) is a bright boy but a bit immature compared to some of his peers; but otoh if he'd been born just 5w later he'd have had to wait an extra year for nursery/school, which he'd have found boring I think. He's now 13 and at a highly selective top of the league independent school in London. We weren't told as such, but they must make allowances even at 13+ for the immaturity factor. Looking at his year list, there are lots of June, July and August birthdays, which is clearly a different scenario to that flagged up by some other posters.

Dd is 7 and has just joined a selective girls' school, again very high performing. She's an Autumn birthday. At an open day before her 7+ exam we were told they did take the children's relative ages into account, so not to worry if your little girl was, say, a late August birthday.

It's quite obvious, especially in schools which select for their reception intake, that a child of 3.5 is simply not going to be able for the most part to do the same things as a child almost a year older. Schools will be aware of this; if they aren't, then I'd recommend finding another one ! My experience so far is that in terms of assessing for school intake, while there's nothing to beat simply having been alive and experiencing a happy day to day life for a few months longer than your peers, there's no need to worry that your summer babe won't cope. In fact, they usually just get on with it without worrying at all !

In terms of the seasons generally, there are pros and cons for all. Interestingly, I generally feel a bit low when the nights draw in (don't we all !). But when I had dd in late October, that was the one year I didn't experience any of those usual SAD symptoms, either at the end of the pregnancy or while she was tiny through the winter. Hormones ?

pollydoodle · 13/09/2006 17:11

Apparently there can also be long term effects on the health of the child dependent on the month the baby was born in. All sorts of things from cancer risk, schizophrenia, suicide, epilepsy, even alcohol dependency. Different months, different risks so I guess it all evens out in the end . And it is only a slightly increased risk, sorry, I don't want to sound to negative!

I do think it is interesting though; apparently they think it might be something to do with getting different illnesses or different amounts of daylight etc that have effects on the developing baby as well as the mother. Everybody's known that rubella while pregnant can be very dangerous for the baby, now it seems that even things like colds or flu can have subtle effects on the baby's development.

Here's an article from the bbc - bbc article . Unfortunately I couldn't find the one I was looking for but this one has lots of general info in even though it is nominally about suicide risk.

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