Dilemma: ds just started reception - do I have to invite whole class to his b'day party!!!

[zippy539]

Straw poll, please.
As title says, ds started in reception two weeks agO. He knew absolutely no one when he started but is starting to make a couple of 'vague' friends - though their names still seem to evade him.
Anyway, it's his birthday in three weeks and because we're going to be moving house around the same time, he's going to be having his party at the local adventure/soft play place. The question is who the heck do I invite? If it was further into the year I'd just ask about six of his friends, but given that he doesn't really have any yet what do I do? Do I have to invite the whole class (gulp). Can I get away with just inviting the boys... Frankly I'd love to forget about the whole thing, but he's been short changed on the whole party thing every year for one reason or another, plus I think the event might help him feel more settled at school.
Also - in your experience, if I DO invite the whole class (22 of them....) what's do you reckon the take-up rate would be. Hopefully not 100% or I'll be in penury for the rest of the year...

Any advice much appreciated.

Yes you're right marz - it'll have to be something manageable.

Maybe I could get a rubber stamp made 'THANKS!' and stamp their foreheads on the way out.

I hate dealing with large numbers of other people's children though; it makes me feel queasy. Especially when - no pressure - they're supposed to have 'A Fun Time', so you have to look like laid back carefree mum and not get steamed up.

Oh god, I've said it before, the only way to get through a birthday party is ever so slightly p%$$£d.

I think when it's early days in reception - you sort of have to invite everyone. My heart always breaks on those threads where some little one has been inexplicably left out and knows it. Once they've all settled in, you get to know who they've all made friends with, but those with September birthdays haven't worked all that out yet.

for thankyous - do something on the computer (maybe in word with a photo from the day). DS gets to write thie name and his name on it - that was more than enough for my 5 year old !

We didn't have the option to write the specific present - someone else opened all the presents before we got to them and we had no idea who gave what .

We did invite the whole class - but there are only 9 of them ! And if we had only invited boys it wouldhave only been DS and one other .

I think it is nice ot have a mixture of boys and girls - there is so much stereotyping at such a young age - it is my moment of protest. But then DS has also been the only boy at an all girl party recently - that's what comes of being in a classfull of girls

Just maybe bring a little something (bag of jelly babies and a balloon) for ds to hand out to everyone in his class and invite 3-4 round for tea.

The play areas near me hire out for up to 20 children, after that it is £6 a child.

But you don't have to do anything apart from turn up with a cake which is a major bonus imo.

Invite the class, you will get to know the parents then.

Tiny....I LOVE the stamp idea!!!
As for other people's children....I am so glad it is not just me!!! It is not that I do not like them , infact I do have good relationships with some...(!!) but I do feel it is hard to deal with them without feeling and looking like the uptight mum that I am, I would give an arm and leg to be able to be more relaxed.
throckenholt
I tend to agree on the boys only thing...surprisingly, as I am a bit nervous about the energy of boys in big groups, (I have 2 girls and am girly myself was educated all girls too) BUT I don't want my girls to have to be girly, so I try very hard to not stereotype. (Well, I just did by saying the boy group thing!)

Personally I am not in to the "invite the whole class" thing - and fortunatelt no-one esle at ds' school seems to be either (he is just going in to Primary 2).

If you invite the whole class now - at the beginning of Recpetion, then yuo are setting a precedent that the other parents may feel obliged to follow, whether or not they can afford it.

If your boy is a "boys' boy", I would go with just inviting the boys, if you really can't get any names out of him.

Or alternatively, cold you go along to school with some semi-completed invititations (ie everything bar the child's names) and get ds to point out who he wants to come.

Ds' own birthday is on Sunday - and although the Scottish schools start in mid August, this meant that last year he hadn't really made any friends. We had got organised beofre the summer holidays and got contact details for his friends from nursery (Scottish equivelanet of pre-school) and invited them, plus a couple fo other friends he has from outside school. Because he hadn't yet made firm friends, it wasn't a big deal. Does your ds still have friends/conact with kids from pre-school/nursery?

This year it is totally different, with the majority being anemd by him for us and are from the school, with a few extra from "outside" school. Interestingly, he has chosen to invite a few girls - one in his class, one the wee sisiter of a boy (who is also invited) in the year above him, who he knows from After School club - and two Primary 7 girls who apparently dote on him!

There are going to be 16 in total - the house wil be in chaos! Fortunately we have a big enough house (amd main room) to accomodate them all. Silly Billy is going to have his work cut out!

Re thankoys I took a photo of my DS holding a large thank you sign . ( It was even in TAB magazine on top tips LOL ) I have also taken a photo of each child with ny DS ie when they are eating and sent these as thankyou notes but then again I have even been known to email thany you notes as well . Hope some of these ideas help .