child at risk

[mslucy]

Hi there.

I was wondering if other mumsnetters might be able to help me.

I rent out a flat near where I live to a young couple with a baby (similar age to mine).

The mum is nice, works hard and always pays the rent on time.

The dad is another matter.

I have now seen him several times PISSED out of his head while he's supposed to be looking after their baby.

I had an embarrassing encounter with him in the local Sainsburys about 2 months ago where he was off his head and nearly phoned social services but gave him the benefit of the doubt - it might have been his birthday or he might have had some terrible news and been in a bad way.

However, I saw him yesterday in an even worse state, sitting outside a back street pub near a busy road, pissed out of his face with another seedy looking bloke while the baby crawled under a table screaming.

I phoned the NSPCC last night and they said I should phone social services as the child is at risk.

The alternative is to phone the mum, but I'm scared he'll abuse me if I do.

I have thought about asking them to leave the flat but that would only cause them problems and make matters worse for the child.

What should I do?

I should follow NSPCC advice & phone SS. I assume that they would keep the identity of the person who told them confidential anyway ??

Phone social services, it is all confidential and there shouldnt be any need for them to know it was you that phoned. The child is the paramount priority.

definitely phone social services

Agree, with the previous posts. Just think how awful you will feel if you do nothing and something happens to the baby? It is a horrible situation and I don't envy you.

This is a horrible horrible position for you to be in and I dont envy you at all but you HAVE to do the right thing and call the social services,the baby's safety and well being is paramount

Yup, phone SS, he's obviously not coping with being a fulltime dad and the family need to change their whole way of life. Although it may be give her the impetus to kick him out so you may then find the rent gets late while she sorts out childcare/benefits etc. If rent does become an issue point her to here or even offer to help her if she doesn't have access to a computer.

to be honest I don't think he brings a lot to the party, so I doubt it would make much difference to her financially if she kicked him out.

And money is far less important than a child's safety.

I'm going to phone them today - wouldn't be able to live with myself if I didn't.

You are doing the right thing, there should be more people like you in the world

Good for you

you should phone social services

Oh God mslucy this post has really shocked me, I'm sitting here shaking having a flashback to what my life was like with ex. It was only when I split up with him that people said to me "you know, I noticed sometimes that he smelled of drink when you were at work and he was with the baby". Or "sometimes he left him alone while he went out". To which I thought "well why the fuck didn't you tell me then, or do something about it?

All I knew, was that his behaviour was bizarre and odd and incomprehensible and I felt helpless and frightened and utterly bewildered. If someone had phoned SS, it would have forced me to face up to what the fuck was going on in my household. You are doing her and the child a favour by phoning SS, don't feel guilty about it - I wish someone had done something as positive for me, it would have made me face up to stuff months earlier than I did.

Phone social services. Do it now. You can be anonymous - just let them know that you are concerned.
Also if you see him alone with the baby while obviously drunk then phone the police - they would take this very seriously - they have their own child protection units as well so you could always phone and ask to speak to someone from the child protection team - they're very good.

Ring Social Services. NOW.

How did you get on mslucy?