I'm falling for someone I hardly know...

[Realitycheck]

and it's a woman!

I'm a happily married mum of 3 but I can't get this lady out of my head. She's funny, strong and very cute looking. She's also single and vulnerable and I want to be her friend but also have these strange feelings when I see her or talk to her.

Starting to think I'm going mad - I've never had the slightest romantic/sexual feelings for another woman before.

Wow!!

Sorry not sure what to say to this - not happened to me before??

Hope it goes the way you want it to!!

Blimey. Are you going to act upon your feelings? How would your dh react if he knew?

I can't comment on the confusion of finding you might have feelings of a different orientation.

All I keep thinking is that to do anything about it is as much a betrayal of your marriage as if it were a man you harboured these feelings for.

If you are a happily married mum of three please try and resist and avoid breaking four innocent hearts.

This has happened to a friend of mine!She has now left her dh and is blissfully happy-caused a few raised eyebrows at school to start but now just part of the furnitureGood luck!!!!!!!!!

This happened to a friend of mine. She had always been in heterosexual relationships before, had children, then met a woman she was very attracted to and it was reciprocated. They had a relationship for 2 years but in the end it didn't work out.

BUT...she was a single parent when she met her partner, she wasn't happily married. It's a lot to risk, as it would be if it was a man you were attracted to. Plus, coming on to your friend is likely to freak her out big time if she isn't attracted to you/that way inclined.

FWIW, my friend said she had never been attracted to another woman either - she said it was the person she was attracted to, and that she didn't know if she would ever have that strength of feeling towards another woman, or if it was just a one off. So no, I don't think you're going mad, and I don't think it's that unusual, but I think your pseudonym is very apt - you need to really think about what a potential mess this could be. Take care xx

are you sure its just not a fantasy, like a forbidden fruits sort of thing??

What does she think about it? Have you told her? Is she gay?

No I've not told her and I've no intention of doing anything about it - I guess I'm just trying to understand why this is happening.

The more I think about it, the more I think that it's coz of what's going on in her life right now - she has been to hell and back in the last 6 months and I admire her so much.

I do love my husband and kids but she is so bright and funny and she makes me feel more alive just by her personality than my husband does.

She definately isn't gay and I've no idea how she'd react if I told her.

It' all too wierd to inderstand really.

These things happen. If you've no intention of doing anything about it, I wouldn't worry about it. Just continue enjoying the friendship and put it down to the mystery of life.

realitycheck - am in a hurry so sorry if I repeat what somebody else has said.
This happpened to me with somebody I used to work with. It is normal so dont start worrying about it, the more you stress about it you will convince yourself of all sorts.
Could it be that you just see qualities in this lady that you admire, and indeed find attactive qualities? (hope that makes sense.) Perhaps she is in a similar situation to you, you can relate to her, and admire her. But as a friend?

Dont do anything......you would hurt too many people and you dont even know if she feels the same. If you were to act on it then she might reject you and you would lose her as well.