Once upon a time there was an ordinary girl living in a normal family in a typical town. She never had any particular career in mind but she always knew she wanted a family. Before any sort of fairy could click her heels, the girl found herself to be a happily married woman with perfect (!) children. All was well. She worked part time in a job that she enjoyed ( "I have the best of both worlds!" she said.) Before too long she was walking home from school in the morning alone, her head full of good intentions now that she finally had "time to herself?
But.. where was HERSELF? For the woman felt herself to be a mirage: a juggler, a mother, a wife and a worker; doing all things well and nothing properly. She found it hard to remember what she enjoyed. Cooking, cleaning, shopping, washing, ironing, loving and working seemed to have left her drained. Perhaps she had given too much of herself away and forgotten to keep a little in reserve? Life was good, they were happy and she felt lucky, but when she looked in the mirror she couldn?t see herself, just a composite of the roles that a woman does. Perhaps if she worked full time it would be easier to get job satisfaction and self esteem.. but each day her children grew more independent ; if she missed their precious childhood now, surely she would regret it in the future? She could return to work properly when they were older; people will be more accepting of older workers then surely?
Backwards and forwards she went lacking the confidence to contemplate real change. Time spent doing something for herself felt like a betrayal of her children.. foolish she suspected but her feeling nevertheless.
Others around her made it look easy and few would suspect that she felt so drained, so unsure and so uncertain of the ending her story deserves. Will she ever find herself .. does such a thing as Me still exist? Might any other woman feel the same or is she totally alone?