Silly 'said's'....

[Levanna]

I know there are similar threads, but it's so funny to read of silly or funny things that have been said to people (by anyone at all). So, has anyone heard any crackers recently?

Mine have to be:
My sis when travelling in the back of my car with my v.young DD at the time.

her: GASP "Lev!!"
me: "What! What is it!"
her: "She's (baba) got a hole in her head!"
me: Slam brakes on "Whatdyameanshe'sgotaholeinherhead!!!!"
her: voice escalating in panic "There, there, on top of her head...see?!?!"

Yup, it was her (perfectly normal!) fontanelle

When pushing my (white) DD and her (black) best friend of the same age in a trolley, a lady at the supermarket commented on my beautiful 'twins'!

Today my DD's first words were "mummys baby's in mummy's tummy"
me: "yes darling, and it's your baby too"
DD: "No mummy! My baby's in my tummy" )

p.s. my DD is 22+ months, and her first few attempts at saying vinegar (today)came out as "sillybugger"

Today I was telling my ds, age 4, that I'd won a mumsnet competition and we'd soon be receiving three of his favorite videos. He asked how I won the contest. I explained that "we won it by writing about your favorite videos."

Suddenly very excited, he said, "You mean I won because I watch the most videos of ANYONE?"

Er, I hope not, darling.

lol
i asked my 3 year old dd last night if she was tired,she said
"my legs are tired but my face is not"

My Mum is good at this!!

She once shouted at my 3 brothers and me for 'running up the stairs like a herd of ENVELOPES!!!!!'

She also slapped my brother for singing 'When the going gets tough' because she thought he said 'Go and get stuffed!!'

Sounds like a tough childhood but it wasnt....honest!

ROFL collision,

Once when we were living in Greece and my mam was working in a local bar, she refused to serve a guy who wanted a Fernet Blanca as she thought he was taking the mik and asking for a Thermal blanket!!!(She actually said to her boss,"Oh get rid of this idiot asking for a blanket in this heat)

I told dd,(ages 3), that a pen had ran out the other day and she said," But it hasn't got any legs"
The other night we were lying watching telly and she said," D'ya know mammy, i'm beginning to feel really nice about you!"
(I didn't know she'd gone off me!)

Message withdrawn

Mum is great at these too.....classics include
'Which left arm?' (I said my arm hurt - I'd broken my left arm some months previous...)
In response to my father 'Listen to those guns' - 'You know I can't take my eyes off the road'.....

Friend told me her dd had stomachache which she described as 'a headache in my tummy'

Over the last couple of days stepDS2 (10) has come out with these beauties....

DS2 - "I had tea last night at Jack's"
Me - "Did you ? That's nice, what did you have ?"
DS2 - "Chips and keith !" He meant quiche !?!

We went to the safari park today at Bewdley, and we were talking about the last time we went. It was summer 2002 and I was heavily pregnant, he was remembering his cousin playing with the pigmy goats in the "PETTY zoo section" !?!

Our chemistry teacher at school told us how he thought Bananarama were obscene. We thought perhaps he didn't approve of the way they dressed or something. Turned out he'd mis-heard the title of their song "Venus"!!

Overheard DD1's teacher explaining this to another mum last week, so don't know how it happened but:

She explained to the children that she (mrs B) would be away on a course the following week.

She then overheard one child tell another that Mrs B would be away on a horse the following week.

Then had a mother approach her asking her why she would be weighing a horse the following week!

Priceless!

Years ago, in his twenties, dh ordered a Pernod in a Paris night-club. They brought him........... a bowl of prunes (pruneau) .

Just last week my ds1 (aged 3) was sitting on his balding granddad's knee & said "Granddad - you haven't got enough hair on your head" !!

The funny thing was that he wasn't even looking at his granddad at the time as he was watching TV, so had obviously been thinking about it for a while before he said anything.

PMSL Tetley!

My Nanna told me this today about her friends grandson. The little 3 year olds Nanna let him put his own shoes on, as he wanted to. When he'd finished, she looked down and said "That's very clever darling, but they're on the wrong feet".
He looked confused and said "But Nanna, they're the only feet I've got".