oh I can't stop deliberating whether or not to go back to work...uninteresting to anyone except me tbh

[Enid]

we could manage on dh's salary although things would be tight and nowhere near all the 'luxury' things

going back would mean, after childcare, the grand total of £20 a week for me, but once dd2 started school next Sept my income would increase

the STRESS of finding suitable childcare for three kids..arararaggggggggggggg

the STRESS of the juggling act...

BUT will I regret giving up my job, possibly the only vaguely interesting one in the area, there are NO interesting jobs in Dorset unless you are a teacher adn I am too old to retrain

work does drive me mad and the politics are so stressful...

I have loved picking the kids op from school and being at home

please feel free to ignore confused rambling

can you not career break for a year?
£20 does not seem a lot for the stress you will be under
dont forget childcare goes up in the hols

I dunno, personally I feel if you are onto a good thing (your job) then you should keep hold of it. I regret giving up mine (though that doesn't mean you will feel the same!).

also don't think you are too old to retrain if that's what you wanted

i know

three lots of childcare in the holidays

and also I am enjoying this summer holiday and dont like the idea of this being the ONLY one where I am at home with kids

no dont watn to retrain

would be crap teacher

but (playing devil's advocate) once you are out of the job loop, if you felt like going back later on, would it be impossible to find a suitable one nearby?

what is your job?

You don't sound that passionate about your job, why not do something more fun for less money next September when the money won't be such an issue? If you're an ambitious professional and spent years training then yes, stick with it but if you just kind of wandered into it and potter along, life's too short. If you can afford ot be a lady of leisure, any work you do must be worth the time away from your kids.
I've promised DH I'll find a part time job once my youngest starts playschool - on my list of fun jobs to fit school hours are dinnerlady, Sundays on a checkout at Waitrose (and only Waitrose, mind [grin[) or working in a very quiet bookshop. Ooh and evenings stacking shelves at M&S at Christmas.

get a job at m&s
next door neighbour works there and gets 80% off food every night
she brought me a bag of food yesterday should of cost £35 and cost me £4 odd

Enid, I think you should go back. iirc you weren't very happy as a sahm and as you say, it is the only interesting job in Dorset. I think you need to rope dh in to being involved on the juggling and stuff then I bet it would be a whole lot less stressful. Atm I do morning drop offs of ds and dd and dh does evening collection since I can't always guarantee finishing on time. For you I don't think it's about the money. And I think you should go for the merged job (will it be more money?). If you don't get it then decision made but if you do, well. I think you loved picking up and school run and stuff partly because you aren't doing it all the time and because you have perceived choice, i.e. a job to go back to.

Agree with www. I loved playing at sahm whilst on maternity leave, because I didn't have to do it forever.

i'll be your friend fio fio
bring you little food parcels etc

If it were me, I would go back to work (yes I know it's a hoo ha setting up the childcare etc etc), give it x amount of months and then review the situation. You might say, "great, I'm back at the only interesting job for me in Dorset, and it is worth the juggling,", or "bollocks, I don't give a shit about this being the only interesting job in Dorset, I am jacking it in as this isn't working for me".

I too agree with www. I think she has got where you are at. And she has experience of both.

i gave up work after my third child was born and do slightly regret it (in fact I'm looking for another job now). For me too it wasn't about the job (I definitely didn't love it) and it wouldn't have made me much money, but it is about the independence and the time out away from the children and alot of other things. I wish now that I had just asked for a career break. Is there any chance of you extending your maternity leave or doing fewer hours?

You can forget yer diptych candles in the loo too so, can you live without them? Puff is very right, you can always resign if you don't like it.

yes and stingo esque trainers
god where is she

I wish i had a job outside the house, I am considering getting a nanny when DS2 is a year old. So I would say go for it

I was in a similar situation after two children and decided not to go back to work for what would then have been £100 per month taking into account all the added extra expenses that go with a job (not just childcare but lunches, and transport costs), and I was not sure that £100 would cover childcare problems should they arise, the expected contributions to various social events (calculated according to salary rather than how much of it I would have been getting iyswim) and the occasional necessary bar of chocolate.

Pollyanna has a strong point about the loss of independence, but I would do your sums very carefully. www sounds like she has a good arrangement, but those cannot always be negotiated - would your DH be able to cover one end of the day reliably? (Mine wouldn't ).

I feel my children have had some benefit from my being around to deal with any problems and be there for big occasions, so I don't regret my decision (if I can call it that given it was rather forced on me).

Oi enid, what are you thinking on this?